Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

I guess one's defintion of "long" may vary from person to person but I am leaving tomorrow for something work related (I can't get specific - sorry!). I will be away (in another state) for two weeks straight, then home for one full day and then away for one more week and then that's it.

For us, that is a lot. The longest we were apart since we became a couple, got engaged and then married was ONE night (the night before the wedding lol) - So, as you can imagine, this is hard for him and I.

Anyone else been through this? Whatever the reason may be - travel, work, school, etc. How long for you? How was it? What did you do to make it easier? Tips? Advice? HELP!

I wasn't upset until NOW!

Message edited 11/24/2007 6:08:05 PM.

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

We'd been married about 6 months when we decided to move back to LI from Boston. I accepted a job offer but since he needed a home office for his, we had to wait until we could get into the house we were buying, so for 6 months, he stayed in Boston, and I lived on LI in a corporate apartment, and then with his grandmother in Queens when my time in the apartment ran out. We spend 6 months traveling back and forth on weekends. It wasn't easy but we survived. Having cell phones with an unlimited family plan helped!

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

Dh goes away with his father once a year for about 4-5 days on a camping trip to Watkins Glen. I don't go, and I stay at home. I cope by going out with friends and keeping my mind off the fact that I'm alone.

Now that I have a dog, it makes life a little easier for companionship/protection.

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

DH moved to NY one month before our wedding, while I stayed behind. We were together for 9 days for our wedding/HM, then he went back to NY and I joined him after I finished a work contract. We were apart for 1 month the first time, then 1.5 months the second time.

He just started a new job so work kept him busy. I was busy with wedding details the first month, then I had family and friends to keep me busy the second month. We missed each other a ton, but it went by fast.

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

Thanks for the advice/help. It is comforting

I think it would be easier, for me, if I was staying home and he was going away. If I had my family and friends to see and my dog to spend time with -- and all the other creature comforts of home I think that would make all the difference... but because I'll be the one away staying in a Hotel room by myself I think that will be the hardest part.

Thankfully, in the grand scheme of things, it is not that much time apart - but it's hard.

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

DH and I had to be apart for months at a time when he deployed to Iraq - the longest ever was 10 months at a stretch. Nothing I tell you is going to make it easy, but some things I did to help cope were:

1. start a count-down. I used post its for every week he was supposed to be gone, and it felt great to rip one down at the end of each week. You can do every day, since your separation will be shorter.

2. keep busy. Very busy. Idle time will only make you more sad than you already are.

3. do some stuff just for you that you might not have time to do normally, or wouldn't do with him around. Bring a great book you've been dying to read, or give yourself a facial in the hotel room one night, or eat a pint of Ben & Jerry's for dinner!

4. agree upon a regular time when you will talk to each other each day. (This is something we do now when he goes on business trips, since obviously we couldn't talk on a regular basis while he was deployed!) When you already miss each other, it's nice to know you have that time already set aside, rather than having hurt feelings if you call unexpectedly & he's busy, or he calls and you're still in a meeting, etc.

5. understand that it will not be fun, but that you will get through it and be stronger for it.

6. understand that in the grand scheme of things, this is not so bad. It actually helped me keep myself in check to tell myself to buck up - other wives had to be apart from their DHs for 13 month deployments, so I was lucky to only get 10.

7. tell yourself that the next time you have to be apart for only a few days, it'll seem like a piece of cake in comparison!

8. look forward to your reunion. Plan an outfit to wear when you see him again for the first time, plan something special to do on that weekend in between your weeks away, etc. Homecomings are the BEST!

Hope this helps...

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

Joe was in the National Gard so we spent 1 wkkend a month apart and then 2 wks in the summer. We talked as much as possible, and I made his coming home special.. I went to Victoria Secret and made his favorite dinner the night he got back. It is really hard, but it was hardst for me because my step-father died while he was gone for 2wks. He died the day after he left so we had unique challenges anyways. Just try not to dwell on it and have friends come and get together with him. Take a shirt of his you can sleep in and a picture of you guys. It's not as bad you think, but it does have it's moments many for you

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

I used to work for a company where I had to go to Cleveland for 2 weeks, and then Phoenix for 2 weeks, all within 2 months, for training. It was the hardest thing ever. I hated being away from DH that long. The best advice I can give is to try and keep busy as best you can. I read a book, magazines, rented a few movies, went to the local mall, went on the computer, etc. I didn't really hang out with anyone on the Phoenix trip so it was really boring at times. On the Cleveland trip, I was spent time with 3 other people in the same position, so we all kept each other's minds off missing our spouses back at home. I know how hard it is- good luck to you!!

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

JessinCA gave great advice.

Im sure you will do fine (you might even start to love the ME time for yourself )
maybe write him a journal that you will bring back to him, a poem, a letter...

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

we have been together for eight years and this is the first night i wont be spending it with him because of a wrong decision to make, i told him to leave and he did and despise myself for doing it, because i really miss him


I hope that you can deal with it better than me

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

Can he do a weekend trip to see you?

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

Last summer...I was 6 months pregnant and I took a job in Las Vegas (I'm a consultant). I flew out on Sunday afternoons...came home on the red-eye and landed on Friday mornings. For 2 months (it was supposed to be 3 months, but baby decided to come early!). It was stressful....being away from home all week, and only have 1 real day to ourselves (Saturday). We made it through....you will too!

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

Posted by anna

JessinCA gave great advice.

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

Posted by BJandDan

Can he do a weekend trip to see you?

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

good luck with the test

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

Dh and I have been away a lot from each other.... we were away our first summer together for 7 weeks and then 2 summers after that for 6 weeks.... With my career that is what needs to be done... Just talk when you can... it will def be ok

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?

We have been aprt for 6 months when we were first dating, two times for 3 months when we were engaged, and 2 times for 1 month in our marriage.

The only thing that keeps me going is there is an end in sight. It was really hard on us b/c of the time zone and we couldn't talk every day.

Try to think, it won't be that long and enjoy the time you have to yourself.

Re: Has anyone ever had to be away from DH and/or home for a long period of time?