Having a Bad Day

Lately I've been feeling really down.

I still cry and I don't feel like doing anything but sleeping. When I'm out doing things I'm okay but when I'm home and by myself I just want to crawl up in a ball and cry.

I am still waiting to get results back from the testing we had done. I still don't know why this happened and everytime I think I am getting over it I have to remind myself that it's going to feel raw again once we get the results back. I am dreading the results which we should get on Wed. I am anxious and scared to know.

For awhile I thought I was doing okay. I was fighting the feelings. Just last week I was on cloud nine. Now I feel like I am in a rut.

When will these feelings go away? I hate feeling sad/angry.

Re: Having a Bad Day

i cant give you an answer but i can sympathize since i am going through it now. its only been a little over a week for me and i thought i was feeling a bit...just a bit....better and boom....misery again. i do know that chemically you are going to have your high and lows...its only natural. you went through a devistating thing! try to take deep breaths and think positive thoughts...it will be ok...when? i dont know but from hearing from others it seems that with time it gets better...vent if you need to..you can fm me as well if you need...

xoxo

Re: Having a Bad Day

Re: Having a Bad Day

Re: Having a Bad Day

I totally understand how you are feeling. I def have good days and then boom Im sad and cant stop crying. It will get better!

Re: Having a Bad Day

I'm so sorry for your loss. All I can say is take it day by day. It's very tough. It's 6 months later and while mostly I am ok, every now and then I will just break down crying.

I have just allowed myself to let it all out and usually I fell better after. Then I feel guilty if I don't think of my loss, like it never happened. It did and devastated me.

My grandmother told me in between my dad and aunt, she had 2 miscarriages (this was over 50 years ago). She said when I was having a tough time she remembered all the feelings and said it felt like yesterday. She told me you never forget, you just move on because it's all we can do. I don't know why but I found a lot of peace in what she said.

All I can say is be patient with yourself and give yourself time.

Re: Having a Bad Day

Thanks

I am having such a tough time with this. I should be getting some of the test results tomorrow and I have a knot in my stomach and a lump in my throat over it.

I just want all of this to be over. It feels like I am living in a nightmare sometimes. I went out to do some shopping and I was fine but then out of nowhere I had to keep myself from crying in the middle of the supermarket. The feelings just strike out of nowhere.

I am getting antsy to try again and at the same time I am scared to death. I feel like I am in purgatory when it comes to ttc again.

Re: Having a Bad Day

I know how your feeling and EVERYTHING that your feeling is completley normal. I had my loss in July & I thought I was "over it" and dealt with it and still some days are just really difficult. Time definitley heals but it doesn't make it go away. One day you think your fine and the next it hits you all over again. For me, I don't think I'll be completly okay until I get a BFP again and know everything is okay this time around.
Lots of hugs to you. I hope each day gets better for you.

Re: Having a Bad Day

So sorry!!!
My family and I took a planned vacation to the Caribbean and Fl for 2 weeks on Jan 1st. Obviously not planned due to the MC just happened like that. I can tell you I feel 99.9% better then I did prior to my trip. I feel relaxed and ready to start over. Perhaps you and dh can take a long weekend away? It really just made all the difference.
I also got my results back and even a few more on the trip. What we realized was that A) we did nothing wrong. In fact ours was the most common for miscarriages B) we would not have been able to handle a very sick child. IMHO if you are feeling really down, its OK to go see someone for a few months. You experienced a loss. You will get through it either way!