Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

Please no flames. I'm feeling like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place and I would really like to know what other Moms would do in my situation.

Let me start off by saying that DS doesn't go to daycare and I am a SAHM so he is home with me every day. Ok..

DS just turned 2 last week. About 3 weeks before his Birthday he had his first febrile seizure from a fever of around 102. It was hands down the worst moment of my life, and I've been through hell and back over the years.

My son has had all of his vaccines on time, except for MMR. Our ped gives the MMR vaccine at their 18 month appt, which is something I was not comfortable with, so we talked it over with the him and he allowed us to delay it until his 2 year well visit. Ok, no big deal.

His 2 year well visit is scheduled for the first week of September, and now that he had this seizure I am NOT comfortable with him receiving his MMR until he is a little older. I'm thinking 2.5-3. I say not comfortable, but really I am petrified and it is crippling me.

Now here's my predicament.

Last November I enrolled DS in a twos program. He is supposed to start in October. It's only two days a week for 90 minutes each day. I just got a letter from the school saying that children cannot attend the program unless they are fully vaccinated. I really want him to go because I think it would be a great experience for him.. but I can't see compromising my Mommy instinct for this.

This is where you ladies come in. What would you do if you were me? I plan on sitting down with his ped and talking this over with him but they are so nonchalant about febrile seizures I'm afraid he's going to tell me I am being irrational. The thing is, I don't WANT to be irrational. I've always been the cool calm collected Mom who never freaks out.

I don't want to not send him to school because *I* am scared to give him a vaccine that he will eventually get. But is a 90 minute twos program really worth compromising my gut instincts? What would you do? I am feeling so torn.



If you've gotten this far, I really can't thank you enough. I am just feeling really alone on this.

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

im a bigggggg supporter of going with your mommy gut....sp my answer is to do just that

Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

Go with your gut in the end but talk to the ped, do your own research and see if and how this seizure could be triggered again by getting the shot. What are the risks? Could the shot do more harm them good??

As far as the program goes, if you do decide to delay the shot, maybe you can get documentation from the Dr about the seizure explaining the delay and why? Obviously no one can force you to give him the mmr if there is a medical reason not to.

Good luck in you decision!

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

No flames but it does sound like you're asking for both sides....I'm a big supporter of vaccinations... do it... Our Mommy instincts can be strong and I understand you are a little scared because of the past but it's been proven time and time again that the MMR is more beneficial than not.

Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

My boy had a seizure at 15 mos. I nned counseling to get my head right after seeing it. I delayed mmr till 3. I would find a different activity of you are feeling like delaying

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

I would set up an appointment to speak with your ped about your concerns.

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

ultimately i think you should go with your mommy instinct. however, since you are asking for advice, i will offer my personal opinion.

i think your son could stand to wait another 6 months to 1 year until he starts a pre-school type program. would it be great to get him out and interacting with other children? sure. is it necessary? no. at the age of 2, most children are still engaged in parallel play. i would get him involved in other things like playgroups, outings, etc.


at my son's 15 month appointment, my ped asked how much my son was talking. i told her not so much, and she actually said, "well do you want to wait on giving the MMR because i wouldnt want you to think he has any issues because of it?" i did not give him the MMR that day (nor has he received it to this day at the age of 3), and I'm so thankful that I went with my gut. no questions in my head or "what if's". i do plan on giving my son the MMR vaccine at the age of 4.

good luck with your decision!

Message edited 8/11/2012 6:57:11 AM.

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

Go with your gut... find some other class or mommy and me. I think twos programs are great to give you a much needed break but not essential at all!

Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

My daughter had a febrile seizure just before her second birthday, yes it is terrifying, but your doctor is nonchalant about febrile seizures for a reason. You medicate alternating with tylenol and motrin alternating at the first sign of a fever and go on with your life. They are predictable and controllable. You are vigilant, you are going to be able to keep him safe. You give him the vaccine and dose him with fever meds just in case for 48 hours.

Measles Mumps and Rubella are far more dangerous to your child then a second febrile seizure.

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

I would talk to your ped and then go with your gut instict.

My niece has febrile seizures and she had them up until she was 6 every time she had a fever. So i don't see where delaying the MMR a year would make a difference. My big concern would be the febrile seizures and school, over the vaccine and school. Kids in preschool always come home with something and with the febrile seizures i would be worried about the temperature rising and another seizure. Personally I would think if after I talked with my ped about my concerns with the vaccine and the febrile seizure, and the ped still recommended the vaccine, I would do the vaccine. But in the end you have to make the decision but make sure that when you discuss it with your ped you find out what the side effects are with the vaccine and with the seizure.

Good Luck, and I hope your child doesn't have any more seizures!

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

I just read in a magazine called "Bottom Line", that the US logged something like 222 cases just last year of the measles, where in the past it was something like 60. They say because people arn't vaccinating as much the outbreak is worse. My daughter got the MMR 2 weeks ago, no fever, no nothing. I understand the fear of this shot, but when I see the other side and all the good it does by vaccinating against some horrible diseases, that outweighed all these studies that have no proof to back them up. The studies that have been done are theories, if there was hard evidence our children would not be allowed to receive this shot. But that's my opinion.

ETA: I received the MMR, and so did a lot of us when we were younger.

Message edited 8/11/2012 8:41:08 AM.

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

You have to do it sometime....
Way I see it is you will feel better when it's over.

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

My son also never got a fever from it.. My friends son who also has febrile seizures also never got a fever from it.. As scary as a febrile seizure is, thankfully they aren't dangerous like a regular seizure.. Still scary I know.. I have seen plenty of them.. If it was my child, I would it down with my pedi and discuss it, then I would probably just do it.. Good luck!

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

Don't confuse your mommy instinct with anxiety. All the best scientific research says the MMR is important.

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

I think only you can make this decision. Only YOU will consider your child's individual disposition and advocate for him. That said - there ARE many 2's programs your DC can go to without being fully vaccinated. My DD is starting a 2's program in the fall, she has not received the MMR and they do not require immunizations. We are in an affluent area and this is a very popular program so I am sure there are many like it.

It's a fact not a hypothetical - MMR can cause high fevers which do cause seizures in SOME children - i.e. your child. And, no, they are not dangrous most of the time. However, for us, the risk of 1. getting M, M or R 2. combined with the risk of it being bad and causing some long lasting effects was NOT greater than the risks from this shot at 12 months old. Therefore, I delay it. I know that as my child gets older their reaction to the shot will be minimized as will their risk of febrile seizure. My DS got it at 2yrs 8 mos. I probably willl not give it to my DD until she is 3.

Bottom line - I would do your own research and make your own decisions. Make sure the info you are going by is valid and correct. Discuss it with your ped in an educated way. THAT will lead you to the right decision. Much of the stuff posted on this this website and even some stuff posted on this thread is not even accurate. Only you can know the right decision for YOUR child. Good luck - I know it is a hard decision

Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

I would say talk to your ped. I dont know of any specific link between febrile seizures and MMR shots. If your DC is prone to have fevers following shots, maybe consider using tylenol before the shot as febrile seizure are caused by sudden increase in temperature. Febrile seizures may not be of a huge concern to your ped because for the most part they dont cause damage. However, if you have them you are more likely to have another. I would say your first line of defence then would be to try to avoid a sudden rise in DC's temp. Personally, if it were me, thats what I would do. Your ped is your ped for a reason...you trust them with your DC's health, so talk to them. Dont stop the discussion until you are satisfied one way or the other.

Re: Help! [MMR/Febrile Seizures/I need Advice!]

Sorry to hear about your son. I know how scary it is to see someone you love have a seizure since my dh is epileptic. I can't even imagine seeing one of my babies go through that.

I am a huge believer in going with your gut. However sometimes our guts are really controlled by fear.

My dd needed to have surgery (tubes in her ears) I was freaked out and I put it off for months. She has asthma and I just felt like her breathing issues would some how be affected by anesthia. I was convinced she would be that less than 1% of children who die under general anthestia. Yes in my head I knew it was irrational but every time I thought about them putting her under I would cry and get anxious. The ENT tried to talk me into it over and over again. Finally my ped sat down with me and helped me to sort through my fears and reassured me she would be fine. Ultimately I didn't want her to keep getting ear infections and I choose to take the risk for her own health. Trust me I was a sick to my stomach for weeks leading up to the surgery and a huge mess the morning of.

I don't think your fear is irrational, I think its normal. However you should sort out in your head what the real complications could be. Will delaying the vaccine prevent him from having a reaction? Do you think your fear is going to decrease as time goes on? I think talking to the pediatricain is a good step.

Hope it all works out