How do you deal with someone who constant reminds you how depressed they are???

Everytime I speak to this person I feel terrible. She is constantly crying - (She went through a terrible breakup)

Her depression brings me down. I cant help but to feel miserable after I speak to her It totally destroys my day. Theres no helping this girl. She just has to let time heal her wounds.

Re: How do you deal with someone who constant reminds you how depressed they are???

Personally, I would strongly suggest she see someone professionally to work through it. If she is that depressed, it's the best thing she can do. I would hope she would be open to it bc I think it would be helpful. I don't know how you say to someone that their depression is a downer. I guess you don't but you could keep some distance when you need it - don't always take the calls, or shorten the length of time you speak. I would find this hard to do if I had a friend in need but without knowing your friend, I can just go on the fact that it sounds like it affects you adversely, in which case I see nothing wrong with setting limits for yourself. But it sounds like she needs an ear or shoulder and would definitely benefit from a hired ear who is trained to help people work through stuff, KWIM?

Re: How do you deal with someone who constant reminds you how depressed they are???

As someone who struggles with anxiety and depression, best thing you can do is be there for her. Help her to see what she can do to get better - make a dr appt , work out, just meet for coffee once a week...I know, it's hard to take but when I was really bad I felt really alone....

Re: How do you deal with someone who constant reminds you how depressed they are???

I dont know how often your friend crys to you, but I would just say try to be there and remind her of the positives in her life instead of dwelling on the bad. I agree that you should encourage her to talk to a therapist too. Coming from someone that also went through a painful break up, I cried many times to my sister and best friend. Did it bring them down? Maybe? But they never let me feel that way and always made themselves there for me. I know that I could have never made it through that time without them.

Re: How do you deal with someone who constant reminds you how depressed they are???

My In law's are like this, always depressed. I used to work with someone like this too. I feel bad for people who look at life so stressed out and complain about everything. I try to just listen but after a while it does bring you down. I realized some people are just like this and hopefully a good thearapist can help them try and look at things differently. GL