How do you "let things go"

i find that there r a few situations in life that altho i have made "some" piece with them a part of me still carries it around..either by hurt..guilt..sadness..

at times in my life i feel like im walking around with small boulders chained to my leg and each thing keeps weighing me down more and more and somehow even tho im still walking--i drag it all with me..


its healthiest to let things go--but some pain in life i dont think u can ever just release--and while i do mean breakups partially..im talking death in general of someone u love...friendships lost..moments u wish u could relive..

how do u just let it go

Message edited 12/28/2006 11:04:34 PM.

Re: How do you "let things go"

I wish I knew....there are many things that I cannot and will not let go of...things that really hurt my feelings...I just don't have it in me to let these things go

Re: How do you "let things go"

I wouldn't say I actually Let them Go!
But I Deal & Go with the flow of everyday life and in time things just get easier!
But make No mIstake of it These Things do Tend to Haunt Me now & then!
I hope all is well with You

Re: How do you "let things go"

I also find it difficult to just "let things go"....I think about things that have happened in the past and at times wish I could relive certain situations....but what I do try to do is learn from each one of my experiences and try to make myself a better person because of past experiences, situations, disappointments, ect......You can not change the past but you can learn from it to create a better future for yourself.

Re: How do you "let things go"

I wish I had the answers for you, Michelle

I don't think you ever truly 'let go' though. You move past situations and tragedies.. you learn from some things, and remain a little bit scarred and perhaps tainted by other things. I do think that ultimately, all of these collective things that occur in our lives only make us stronger.. and if nothing else, we learn from it all. Things that occur in our lives make us the people we are now.. and hopefully we can only become better people from whatever life throws in our path. Sadly, the negative incidents just make us more realistic about life and I think you lose some of that 'innocence' that you have from younger days.. But all in all, there isn't anything that can make you fully 'let go' .. (esp. when the situations are ones that leave us truly hurt)

All I can say is that in time, the feelings somewhat fade.. the pain lessens.. and you just keep on moving forward.. after all, what choice to we have. But to fully 'let go' .. well IMO, that's impossible ... you just need to strive to be a better person from all that you've endured

Message edited 12/28/2006 11:20:10 PM.

Re: How do you "let things go"

i have a problem with this. it is very hard for me to do...

Re: How do you "let things go"

Posted by FeliciaDP

I wish I had the answers for you, Michelle

I don't think you ever truly 'let go' though. You move past situations and tragedies.. you learn from some things, and remain scarred and perhaps tainted by other things. I think that ultimately all of these collective things that occur in our lives only make us stronger, and we learn from it all.. and sometimes, they just make us more realistic about life and I think you lose some of that 'innocence' that you have from younger days.. All in all, there isn't anything that can make it easier to 'let go' .. (esp. when the situations are ones that leave us truly hurt)

All I can say is that in time, the feelings somewhat fade.. the pain lessens.. and you just keep on moving forward.. after all, what choice to we have. But to fully 'let go' .. well that's impossible ... you just need to strive to be a better person from all that you've endured

Re: How do you "let things go"

the death of a loved one I hope in time gets easier...I have no real solution for letting go, and don't think you can for that matter. It is not something you can just erase out of your mind

but time heals all wounds I believe

Re: How do you "let things go"

You just do. You distract yourself- focus on other things. Then you think about it less. Eventually it is just let go.

as for a death- I lost my dad 10 years ago. I don't think I will ever "let it go". Especially with the birth of my daughter- I miss him more than ever. I just know how much he would enjoy her and love her.

When he died my attitude was that I was lucky to have a dad like him for 21 years. I had a lot of friends with crappy dads they had no relationship with, or coudn't please or what not. My dad was great. So I always saw myself as lucky to hae a man like him in my life. It made it easier to deal with the loss. I will always miss him and love him. But you just go on with your life. I feel like he looks down on me and my family. I still rely on the advice he gave me and feel blessed to have had such a wonderful man as my father.

Re: How do you "let things go"

you will find you just stop thinking about them!
Others brought up the good point of they might always be there, but not thought of too often!

I really don't think you can totally forget your past...it's what makes you who you are!

Re: How do you "let things go"

I have this problem as well. I deal but, then there are days that it hits me.

Re: How do you "let things go"

I agree that you don't completely "let things go". These are the things that shape your life, positive or negative. I too find myself looking back on past events with sadness, but I do believe that even though it hurts, the pain does fade some what. A very wise person told me "we all survive something"...it is our lessons, what shapes us to be who we are, and maybe even makes us a bit stronger or helps us find what we are looking for. I have experienced many painful things in the past, but I find it helpful to concentrate on what's in front of me...that whole "if you keep looking at what's behind you, you'll trip over what's in front of you" thing. It's not fool-proof, but it helps. I think the key thing is to not let it weigh you down, but look at it as something you "survived" and was made stronger by. Just keep looking ahead

Message edited 12/29/2006 9:33:59 AM.

Re: How do you "let things go"

I don't think you ever completely get over some things.

I do think that you can move past the pain of most of them and take the things you learned and move forward.

When I notice that the hurt from whatever it is, is keeping me from moving forward, making decisions, etc that's when I know it's time to make an effort to "let it go". I don't want to wallow in my sorrow and get stuck in a painful place.

Re: How do you "let things go"

Oh, I don't know.....DH says I make my own stress and paranoia because I either worry or stress about things I can't control or "invent" scenarios where I think people are mad at me or don't like me. It's true. I tend to do this.

As far as letting things go, I'm working on it. It isn't easy, but sometimes when you know in your heart you have done your best and no wrong, you must free yourself of ill will.

Re: How do you "let things go"

I am bad at letting things go too so I usually wait for the right moment for personal closure even if I get it YEARS later.

Re: How do you "let things go"

I made a decision a few years ago that I had to rid the poisin out of my life and let a lot of things go.

I wrote everything down that I was mad or angry about (and I mean everything, I had a lot of baggage) I let it sit for a few days then wrote about everything that was good in my life and let that sit for a few days. I then walked down to the river with the bad list, set it a flame and just let go. I watched all the bad things just disappear. Then I went and had ice cream!

Am I cured? NO!!! But I feel a hell of a lot better then carrying all of this baggage around with me!

Michi- Good Luck in 2007!