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Shorty
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Member since 5/05 30390 total posts
Name:
really
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How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
I had quite a few people not come to my shower...even had a no-show. It was really embarassing, upsetting and insulting, but whatever. I'm almost over it. And yes, my wedding guestlist has changed because of it.  I have no idea who my friends are.....that's disgusting.
anyway, topic at hand.
How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you and said that they "owe you a gift" ?!?!
Just say, "Thank you"?!
I mean, if you purchased a gift for someone, wouldn't you give it to them when you next saw them?  Not just go out of your way to tell them that you "owe" them one?! Some of these people live just a couple minutes from here!!!
I've heard this 5 times in the past 2 weeks, and I don't know how to react! 
I am CERTAINLY NOT expecting gifts - in fact, I was never the one that brought up the subject of my shower and/or gifts - it was the other person in each instance.
I just feel like I'm in an awkward spot - I've just been smiling and saying thank you, don't worry about it, etc.
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Posted 8/18/07 9:46 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!
Member since 6/06 14437 total posts
Name:
C
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
That is awckward... ...if you "owe" someone a gift, you don't tell them. You usually just buy it and give it to them. Do you think it's that these friends just dont have the money right now, or just haven't taken the time to buy you a gift even though your shower has come and gone?
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| Posted 8/18/07 10:16 PM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
From my personal experience, people who tell you they "owe" you a gift did not actually buy it and will most likelly won't. That's just their sense of guilt talking!!!!!
Don't hold your breathe!
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| Posted 8/18/07 10:21 PM |
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LulaBell
:)
Member since 1/06 3508 total posts
Name:
J
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
I would probably respond by letting them know that the gift isn't the important part - that you'd rather see them/spend time with them etc. I would have a hard time not being sarcastic though!
Good luck!
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| Posted 8/18/07 10:37 PM |
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IrishTracy
Believe!!
Member since 5/05 15167 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Posted by smdl
From my personal experience, people who tell you they "owe" you a gift did not actually buy it and will most likelly won't. That's just their sense of guilt talking!!!!!
Don't hold your breathe!
ITA
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| Posted 8/18/07 10:44 PM |
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Shorty
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Member since 5/05 30390 total posts
Name:
really
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Posted by IrishTracy
Posted by smdl
From my personal experience, people who tell you they "owe" you a gift did not actually buy it and will most likelly won't. That's just their sense of guilt talking!!!!!
Don't hold your breathe!
ITA
Oh trust me, ITA too!
I just find myself stumbling on my words....
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| Posted 8/18/07 10:46 PM |
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BaroqueMama
Chase is one!
Member since 5/05 27530 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
While I agree with not holding your breath, I had a few people say the same thing to me, and every time I would respond with, "Oh! Great! I love gifts!"
If people are stupid enough to say that to me, I'm smart enough to let them know I'm expecting them to deliver
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| Posted 8/18/07 10:49 PM |
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Shorty
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Member since 5/05 30390 total posts
Name:
really
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Posted by prncss
While I agree with not holding your breath, I had a few people say the same thing to me, and every time I would respond with, "Oh! Great! I love gifts!"
If people are stupid enough to say that to me, I'm smart enough to let them know I'm expecting them to deliver
and that's why you're awesome
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| Posted 8/18/07 10:52 PM |
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BaroqueMama
Chase is one!
Member since 5/05 27530 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Posted by Shorty
Posted by prncss
While I agree with not holding your breath, I had a few people say the same thing to me, and every time I would respond with, "Oh! Great! I love gifts!"
If people are stupid enough to say that to me, I'm smart enough to let them know I'm expecting them to deliver
and that's why you're awesome
And also why I have my coffee pot
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| Posted 8/18/07 11:04 PM |
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tourist
Member since 5/05 10425 total posts
Name:
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Posted by prncss
I had a few people say the same thing to me, and every time I would respond with, "Oh! Great! I love gifts!"
That's an excellent response. I went with Shorty's response of " No, problem, don't worry about it. . . "
I didn't care that she didn't give a wedding gift (she attended the wedding, not the shower--no gift for either), but it was the pretending she was going to that was annoying. She kept saying, " I have a year , right?"
And this was a co-worker, so I saw her everyday, and still do, almost 3 years alter. Eventually she would ask me what I wanted (Dude, look at the registry), and that was when I really just wanted her to drop the whole subject.
Thankfully , she eventually did.
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| Posted 8/18/07 11:57 PM |
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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A
Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
My BIL did this to us for over 8 years...oh yeah, I still owe you a wedding gift...and he has oodles of moolah.
It got tired quickly...I said nothing in response.
After 8 years we got a Home Depot gift card which was really great..now was that our housewarming too?
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| Posted 8/19/07 9:05 AM |
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mikeswife06
Drama Momma
Member since 9/06 9947 total posts
Name:
Anne
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Well my BFF came to my wedding and said she "owes" me and wants to have my DH and I over for dinner. I will be married a year next month and I still never even got a CARD!!!!!! I sent her a thank you and said "thanks for being a part of our day" Short and sweet. I just sort of give the "okay" with that bewildered look or tone in my voice like ..It's not like I bought you lunch and now you OWE me one.
I don't get too sassy or sarcastic because then I look like the gift seeker but I let them know it bothers me. A card, a $5 gift, just something to show the person means more to you than that. Mind you this same person came to my wedding with a new dress and full head of highlights 
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| Posted 8/19/07 9:51 AM |
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sasha96
lovin' my 2 little ladies!
Member since 5/05 7401 total posts
Name:
Julianne
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
whether they give you a gift or not, they have shown themselves to you and exposed their view on your relationship, IMO. Most of the time I expect that if they had a good or strong relationship with you this would not occur (though I'm sure their are circumstances when someone close does this without the same intent). Lesson learned.
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| Posted 8/19/07 12:36 PM |
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Posted by smdl
From my personal experience, people who tell you they "owe" you a gift did not actually buy it and will most likelly won't. That's just their sense of guilt talking!!!!!
Don't hold your breathe!
ITA 100% - this was my experienece with people who owed me gifts...its better if they just kept quiet about it...
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| Posted 8/19/07 12:37 PM |
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PrincessP
Big sister!!!!!!!!!!
Member since 12/05 17450 total posts
Name:
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Posted by lipglossjunky73
Posted by smdl
From my personal experience, people who tell you they "owe" you a gift did not actually buy it and will most likelly won't. That's just their sense of guilt talking!!!!!
Don't hold your breathe!
ITA 100% - this was my experienece with people who owed me gifts...its better if they just kept quiet about it...
absolutely! I didnt receive gifts from people who told me they were sending them after dd was born. But I do like Rachels idea...make them feel foolish. Maybe a follow up call..."Didnt receive your gift" haha 
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| Posted 8/19/07 12:58 PM |
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Moehick
Ready for the sun!
Member since 5/05 30339 total posts
Name:
Properly perfect™
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Call them up and say your right by their place and can stop by for your gift to make it easier on them
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| Posted 8/19/07 2:56 PM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: How do you treat people that have called/emailed/seen you
Posted by smdl
From my personal experience, people who tell you they "owe" you a gift did not actually buy it and will most likelly won't. That's just their sense of guilt talking!!!!!
Don't hold your breathe!
I agree with that. no expectations... this way if you do get it, you can be surprised.
the next time someone says that to you, just say "ok"
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| Posted 8/19/07 6:27 PM |
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