I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

I was really looking forward to the Level II, thinking that I will finally feel closer to the baby, and connect with it. But, nada. Zilch. Zippo.

DH was like, that was amazing.. I am like, um, yeah.

What the hell is wrong with me??? Or is it just the sleep deprivation???

Maybe it's a defense mechanism in case something still goes wrong. I don't know.. I can't figure it out.

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

I have been the same way with both pregnancies. I rarely get choked up or amazed by it all. But I also had a M/C so I think it is a protection thing.
Have you felt the baby move yet? That is the only thing that seems to move me. Hearing the heartbeat, seeing the level two scan, nada.
I don't think there is anything wrong with you Ummm...unless something is wrong with me!

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

NOpe nothing is wrong with you............. It's not easy to connect with a picture....things still seem so surreal.

My mom said that it took a few days for her to connect with us. It was like one minute she was pregnant adn teh next she was in chanrge of this little life.......... A lot of women I talk to say the same thing, Its a taboo subject but its not abnormal to take a little time to connect to this letter person you have never met.

TO be honest, I know i'm pregnant, some dasys I don't even feel pregnant. I feel the baby moving at least 1 x a day. My bloating has gone away so my belly is even smaller than it was in my first trimester.....its strange and I feel horrible but I don't have a connection yet with this life linside of me..........

WIll I connect, absolutely, but I know that it may even take a few days after the birth to feel that connection.

You are fine, you are normal and these are normal feelings

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

I know how you feel. it could totally be a defense mechanism.. Good thought!

I havent bonded yet either with my baby. I think it is cause I'm afraid something might go wrong and I dont want to get my hopes up!

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

When we first heard the HB, DH was amazed, I was like um OK...it didn't do anything for me, I was honestly more freaked out than anything, and it was totally a defense mechanism in case something goes wrong..now that I feel her moving, its definitely a bit easier for me to connect to her, and I always get a smile to my face when I do feel her rocking on in my uterus

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

Ok, at least I am not the only one.

I mean, I am not a gushy person anyway. So, it's not really a surprise to not react a certain way, but I just feel so COLD.

I have felt some little things which has to be the baby, but I did confirm today that I have an anterior placenta, so the baby is cushioned more so which is why I can't feel much.

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

I have this same problem......I guess it all feels too sureal......like how could this really be happening.....I was hoping that after we found out the sex that is would get alittle easier to bond.......I guess we will see.

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

See if you can get a 3D pic-that may help. But don't worry about it. Some women are just not the mushy type

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

If I didn't find out the sex I wouldn't feel a connection either. I didn't before my Level II. But now that I know she is a girl and she has a name, I def feel a greater connection.

The Level II pics did nothing for me. I didn't even understand what I was looking at except her spine and her little alien eyes

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

You're not alone, DH tears up at every sono...me, dry as a bone. I think it's exciting, but no, I don't feel a connection either. Yesterday was the first time I felt what I think are the "flutters" that everyone talks about, but today nothing.....so again, still no solid connection. To be honest, I don't even have a longing to walk through the baby clothes in the store, and I've been by the sections many times, just no like, "oooh, this is going to be so cute on him/her". None of that. Right now I have a very rational, almost straight scientific feeling about it all. I know there's a baby growing inside, I research the ins and outs, I look pregnant now, but no special emotional bond. I felt bad about it until my best friend confided that she was the same way with both of her babies and even was the same the day they were born. She said she didn't have that "holy crap I'm in so in love with you forever" feeling when they first gave her the baby. She said it wasn't until they came home from the hospital and she had alone one on one time with the baby that she finally felt a connection, so don't worry.

Message edited 9/23/2008 12:59:22 PM.

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

I am with you - I am not the warm and fuzzy mushy type at ALL -

I really don't feel any different other than being exhaused all the time - and when we went for the 9w sono and saw the 'baby' .......DH was SO excited and gushing about how he loved this baby so much already and yadda yadda .........and I was like It's a bean in my uterus ..........it's not a BABY yet - And sadly, to me, I feel like it's not going to be a baby until it's born and there's this actual living breathing person I am responsible for -

I think even when I DO find out the sex, I'm sure I'll be a bit more excited - but I don't think I'll ever have that instant 'pregnant woman' connection to this kid - I really think I'm going to one of those people who has to hold this baby to feel anything real -

Don't get me wrong, I'm doing everything I'm supposed to do and not doing what I'm not supposed to and taking care of this pregnancy as if I were taking care of an 'outside' baby , but I really don't feel all warm and fuzzy about it -

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

I was exactly the same with DD and probably even more so with this pregnancy because my level II was awful and didn't really give me the reassurance I was looking for.
I know it's silly to think we're not attached because deep down we are but I think for me I don't want to get too attached in case something goes wrong, at least that's what I tell myself.
I will tell you when I heard DD cry and held her for the first time though it was amazing and for me the bond and love was instantaneous.

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

I felt the exact same way with both pgs. But unlike the PPs, even when DD was born- I didn't get that "rush of love" that so many women describe. Thankfully, I have a wonderful mother who put it into perspective for me.

In a way, this little being is almost like a parasite..... it saps you of nutrients, of energy, of hormonal balance. There is no tangible return for the hard work- just bloating, cankles, and exhaustion.

Then, this helpless little being is BORN and requires 24 hour care. Again, with no immediate return on all the hard work other than WORSE exhaustion, poopy diapers, and an overwhelming sense of confusion.

Right now- your DC is just a picture on a screen, or subtle movements in your belly. DC has no identity.

Then, he/she is born, and although you've known him/her for 9 months, you are virtually strangers.

It took me awhile before I felt that overwhelming feeling of love for DD. Now- my heart aches for her and sometimes I feel like I can't breathe because my heart is too full. Do I feel that way for DD#2 while she's in utero? Nope. I sometimes wonder how its possible that I'll have enough love for her since my whole heart is already filled with Maddie. But I know I will.

Don't worry about feeling indifferent- you are certainly not alone in that.

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

placenta anterior here - i feel you! my obgyn said i should feel definitive movements from 27-28 weeks! hang in there, we're slowly but surely making our way there!

Re: I am really starting to worry that something is wrong with me.

I know that for me.. Im a pessimist and I am trying so hard not to get too attached as a defense mechanism. The appts definitely put me at ease, but it's still scary. I also think it has a lot to do with the belly bump and physical symptoms. I've been feeling so great during the 2nd tri (knock on wood) and I still don't look that pregnant... sometimes it's all so surreal. Feeling the baby move has definitely brought me a whole lot closer, personally. Dont worry... everything will come with time