I could use some sleep advice

Luca is 3 weeks old today, and even though I've read plenty of times that you can't spoil a newborn, I think we (ok, mostly me) are spoiling him. He really only sleeps one of three ways- in bed with me, while being held, or in his swing. I don't want to instill poor sleeping habits, but if he's not in one of those positions he doesn't sleep for more than 20 minutes and then wakes up screaming. Neddless to say, the less sleep he gets, the crankier he is.
After a very restless, sleepless night two nights ago I had him in bed with me last night. He was an angel. He would wake up every 3 hours to be changed and eat and then would go back to sleep. After falling asleep on the boob today and two failed attempts in the P&P, I had to put him in his swing to sleep.
I just can't see the point in letting a 3 week old CIO. We've let him cry, but after 5-10 minutes of him screaming I wind up picking him up and soothing him. I think he's too young to let him cry in misery, but I want him to be able to sleep when put down.
Do any of you have any suggestions on what we can try?

Re: I could use some sleep advice

3 weeks old is definitely too early to worry about spoiling him and also too soon to CIO. It's JMO but I think plenty will agree with me that there's nothing wrong with letting him sleep in the swing at that age. I know Ellie did. As far as sleeping with you in bed, that's your choice. Is the PNP the only bassinet you have? The bassinet feature on our PNP was a bit too large at first and thus not snuggly enough for her at first. Oh, also forgot to ask are you swaddling? That helps enormously!

Re: I could use some sleep advice

DD is close to that age- she sleeps best swaddled- i'm loving those swaddle blankets- she fights when I put her in it- but once I got her in- she calms RIGHT down- maybe try that?
otherwise you really can't spoil a newborn and need to get sleep anyway you can (I too let DD sleep in bed w/ us at times)

Re: I could use some sleep advice

Swaddling is a really great idea! Also, there is nothing wrong with co-sleeping if everyone involved gets a better night sleep! We co-slept for a while and my husband slept in the spare room, which suited me just fine!!! But whatever gets you sleep is fine and dandy!!! For us, we waited until he was 6 months old to change any sleeping issues, at that point we felt he was old enough to cry it out, which worked great for us!

Re: I could use some sleep advice

My suggestion is to try to relax. Sounds to me like you've been doing a very good job paying attention to what your baby needs at this point. A swaddle may be helpful as well. You are correct that it is way too early to think about CIO.

Re: I could use some sleep advice

3 weeks is def too young to be spoiling him and def for CIO in my opinion.

For the first 4 weeks of DD's life, she only slept at night next to me or on my chest at night, I know bad and dangerous, but it was the only way for us to get 2 hours sleep max a clip.

Basically if that's what working for you right now, go with it.

We thought we were spoiling her too early too, and there's no way sleeping habits can be started that early.

Even with all that sleeping on us and in people's arms, DD has been sleeping through the night since 5 weeks old, and sleeping 10-12 hour clips at 8 weeks old. At 6.5 months, i put her down in her crib and she goes to sleep on her own.

Totally do what works for you and luca and worry about the rest later

Re: I could use some sleep advice

Re: I could use some sleep advice

I don't think you can spoil a child that young. I also don't think you should let him CIO at all either. When babies are that young they do not have the means to soothe themselves.

Have you tried swaddling? It is a lifesaver. If you have and still does not work, try the Miracle Blanket.
The Miracle Blanket It worked very well for us. Liam would sleep no problem but only when swaddled snugly. But if we used a regular receiving blanket he'd be able to kick it off and then he'd be upset it was off of him. Actually now we don't use it, but while we did it was very helpful.

Also do not be too upset about him being in the swing to sleep. I know moms that did that all the time. Just keep him buckled. Try the bassinet or p & p first - one day soon he'll finally adjust and stay in it.

Message edited 11/16/2006 3:02:03 PM.

Re: I could use some sleep advice

another vote for swaddling here. My son also really took to the pacifier to settle down to sleep (if you want to use that). He doesn't NEED it to sleep now at 3 months, but it relaxes him sometimes when he is tired but can't calm down. I wouldn't let him CIO that young and would let him sleep in the swing or wherever he was comfy.

Re: I could use some sleep advice

Ok- I have to say I agree with all the other posters... @ 3 weeks old - he cant be spoiled, and CIO is def. not an option...

I cant begin to tell you how many of these identical posts I have written and read on this forum, and others as well...

There are few babies who like to be alone in the PNP, crib or bassinett- He wants to be in something tight and warm, or close/held by you.... and if it works for you- than so be it...

Once he hits around 3-4 months old- he might start forming habits, and you can decide whether or not you want to continue co-sleep ing or whatever... but right now- you wont be doing anything wrong by letting him sleep with you...

Have you tried swaddling him?

My DS would only sleep if swaddled and in his carseat carrier... (I actually put the carrier right in the bassinett so he was eye level with me at night)
Have you tried that?

He def needs his sleep- and him becoming overtired will def. make it harder for him to go down, and will make him cranky...

So I say- let him sleep wherever he is comfy (and you are comfy as well)

On a lighter note... can we see some darn pics already- We waited long enough for him to get here- no show us the goods!

Re: I could use some sleep advice

I went through this w/Peyton too. She would ONLY sleep in the infant car seat. She eventually out grew it. I say if you found something they can sleep in, use it, they will eventually sleep in the crib. Don't beat yourself up over it. You need sleep too.

Re: I could use some sleep advice

I really felt that swaddeling made a big difference. But my boys wanted no part of having thier arms swaddled, so I wrapped it tight around the rest of their body with their arms out and they slept great like that.

Good Luck!

Re: I could use some sleep advice

I guess I'm in the minority in that I wouldn't want DS in my bed. I would just be way too paranoid that me or DH would roll over onto him. I do agree that 3 weeks is probably way too young to CIO, though. Maybe you should try one of those cosleeper thingees that attaches to the bed??

Re: I could use some sleep advice

Re: I could use some sleep advice