I just need some hugs please

I posted a couple days a go that DS's teacher at daycare is 10 weeks pg and we would have been due around the same time DH has been picking him up every afternoon because I just cant look her in the eye...I am so sad thinking that she is pg and I am not anymore Anyway, DH has a meeting Monday after work so I have to get DS. I hope that I can pick him up without crying my eyes out in front of her. BTW, she knows that I had a miscarriage and feels terrible. I just cant help feeling a little bit angry and very sad Thanks for letting me vent

Re: I just need some hugs please

I am so sorry...it sticks to feel like that, but sometimes you just can't help it. I hope you start to feel better soon- in my experience, once your beta goes down and the hormones get out you will start to feel less raw about it. Right now, it is just about impossible to feel anything but pain....

Re: I just need some hugs please

I hope it goes ok when you pick up your son.....today makes 1 week since the D&C and I'm not feeling quite as much anger/bitterness when I think of other pregnant people. After day 3, I forced myself to get out of the house at least once a day- well one day I was in Macy's and another in Target- both times there were 8 or 9 month pregnant women walking around.....and then yesterday at DMV this woman on line in front of me had this beautiful little girl in her arms, maybe 9 months old, and she kept looking at me, it was like this little girl knew all of my hurt and she just stared at me. It made me sad and happy at the same time, she was such a beautiful little girl. Sorry I didn't mean to hijack your thread.....its ok to have the feelings you have, they will get better day by day. You might already be feeling differently by Monday when you have to pick him up, and if you're not than just try to get in there without having to talk to the teacher, b/c since she knows she might already try and reach out to you and say sorry and that alone might make you emotional. I'm so sorry you have to be face to face with this, its not easy.

Message edited 1/24/2009 9:35:00 AM.

Re: I just need some hugs please

Posted by HelenZ

I hope it goes ok when you pick up your son.....today makes 1 week since the D&C and I'm not feeling quite as much anger/bitterness when I think of other pregnant people. After day 3, I forced myself to get out of the house at least once a day- well one day I was in Macy's and another in Target- both times there were 8 or 9 month pregnant women walking around.....and then yesterday at DMV this woman on line in front of me had this beautiful little girl in her arms, maybe 9 months old, and she kept looking at me, it was like this little girl knew all of my hurt and she just stared at me. It made me sad and happy at the same time, she was such a beautiful little girl. Sorry I didn't mean to hijack your thread.....its ok to have the feelings you have, they will get better day by day. You might already be feeling differently by Monday when you have to pick him up, and if you're not than just try to get in there without having to talk to the teacher, b/c since she knows she might already try and reach out to you and say sorry and that alone might make you emotional. I'm so sorry you have to be face to face with this, its not easy.

Re: I just need some hugs please

Posted by GenLCSW

Posted by HelenZ

I hope it goes ok when you pick up your son.....today makes 1 week since the D&C and I'm not feeling quite as much anger/bitterness when I think of other pregnant people. After day 3, I forced myself to get out of the house at least once a day- well one day I was in Macy's and another in Target- both times there were 8 or 9 month pregnant women walking around.....and then yesterday at DMV this woman on line in front of me had this beautiful little girl in her arms, maybe 9 months old, and she kept looking at me, it was like this little girl knew all of my hurt and she just stared at me. It made me sad and happy at the same time, she was such a beautiful little girl. Sorry I didn't mean to hijack your thread.....its ok to have the feelings you have, they will get better day by day. You might already be feeling differently by Monday when you have to pick him up, and if you're not than just try to get in there without having to talk to the teacher, b/c since she knows she might already try and reach out to you and say sorry and that alone might make you emotional. I'm so sorry you have to be face to face with this, its not easy.

I appreciate so much everything that you said...and no...you were not highjacking my thread

I thought about just getting in and getting out as fast as possible. I also know that I cant avoid her forever. The reason that this whole situation is really upsetting is our similarities..she has a son that is 1 month younger than Jacob and she herself is around my age. I just feel like why can she have this pregnancy go well and I cant. I know there are no real answers but it still bothers me. I do physically and emotionally feel better since finding out that I miscarried on Sunday and since the D&C on Wednesday but its going to be tough watching her progress in her pregnancy just because of her situation being like mine and because of how close our due dates were. I know that only time will make it better and it already has but it still really hurts...I always feel like I am going cry

Re: I just need some hugs please

Posted by HelenZ

Posted by GenLCSW

Posted by HelenZ

I hope it goes ok when you pick up your son.....today makes 1 week since the D&C and I'm not feeling quite as much anger/bitterness when I think of other pregnant people. After day 3, I forced myself to get out of the house at least once a day- well one day I was in Macy's and another in Target- both times there were 8 or 9 month pregnant women walking around.....and then yesterday at DMV this woman on line in front of me had this beautiful little girl in her arms, maybe 9 months old, and she kept looking at me, it was like this little girl knew all of my hurt and she just stared at me. It made me sad and happy at the same time, she was such a beautiful little girl. Sorry I didn't mean to hijack your thread.....its ok to have the feelings you have, they will get better day by day. You might already be feeling differently by Monday when you have to pick him up, and if you're not than just try to get in there without having to talk to the teacher, b/c since she knows she might already try and reach out to you and say sorry and that alone might make you emotional. I'm so sorry you have to be face to face with this, its not easy.

I appreciate so much everything that you said...and no...you were not highjacking my thread

I thought about just getting in and getting out as fast as possible. I also know that I cant avoid her forever. The reason that this whole situation is really upsetting is our similarities..she has a son that is 1 month younger than Jacob and she herself is around my age. I just feel like why can she have this pregnancy go well and I cant. I know there are no real answers but it still bothers me. I do physically and emotionally feel better since finding out that I miscarried on Sunday and since the D&C on Wednesday but its going to be tough watching her progress in her pregnancy just because of her situation being like mine and because of how close our due dates were. I know that only time will make it better and it already has but it still really hurts...I always feel like I am going cry

that's definitely rough that both of you have so many similarities......my godmother's daughter is due August 22nd (5 days before I would have been).....she just got married 4 months ago- her husband really wanted a baby, she has admitted she didn't think she was ready.....and what KILLS me is that I heard from my sister she's still smoking 2 or 3 cigarettes a day she thinks b/c she used to smoke a pack a day that its ok b/c she's cut down so much. I'm an ex-smoker, so yes, I know how difficult it is to quit, but hearing that she's still smoking really gets me irritated. I felt like I was doing all the right things and yet I miscarried. Sometimes this is just how things happen, we have no control over it....as much as both of us want to be pregnant right now, I can only have faith that this is what was meant to happen to me, because there's really no reason I can understand why I'm not pregnant right now. it sounds like we're both going through the same wave of emotions, I hope things get better for us and we both get pregnant again as soon as we're ready!

Re: I just need some hugs please

its the worst having someone similar in due date to you.. my first loss i worked in an office of 10 and I had to face my coworker- due 7 days apart from me- talking about her baby plans to others every day, boy was I glad when she transferred offices.... after my second loss I avoided my little niece & nephew for a little while since it was so tough- why could my sister have 2(no losses) and here i am struggling...

i guess its just our way to grieve, take some time away... hopefully you'll have a quick pickup of your son

Re: I just need some hugs please

Re: I just need some hugs please

Re: I just need some hugs please

I am sorry you are going through this. I totally relate as my friend was on the exact same cycle as me and we would have been due 2 days apart. It really sucks.