i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

if not, how are you getting around it?

my job cant let me work flex time. so either i come in or i dont get paid (if i had sick time, i'd get paid but i dont have anymore).

is there anything that's working for you?did you find telling your boss helped? i plan on telling my boss that i have a bunch of appts coming up in the next few months that i wont be able to predict. she's not going to like it. i dont want to tell her what im gonig through because its not going to make her anymore sympathetic to the rules- they are just that, and she doesnt have any power to change them. plus did i mention she's a big mouth?

The doctor's hours are pretty limited so that's not helping me. plus i dont live very close to the office.
tia

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

Not sure but I think its illegal for her to tell anyone about your medical issues so if u do tell her perhaps stating that you are sharing in confidence to get the point across? Gl!

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

Aww so sorry you are dealing with this. Ok so are you mad about not getting paid or are you just scared to miss more days and piss off your boss?

Can you apply for FMLA time? You may be able to do intermittment FMLA...as long as you have been at your job and you are a big company (or more than 20 employees I think?) I am not sure if infertility treatments would be considered FMLA or not bc you arent technically sick. It may be a grey area but worth researching, do you have an HR dept?

Also I have missed 3 days so far (for my miscarriage) + taken another 1-2 days for dr. appt and this is just the beginning - I JUST started seeing the RE. I am probably going to need 2 days for surgery and more time for dr. appt. I may take it unpaid or try to use a vaca day here or there but I dont have many left to use. My boss sort of knows my situation but I still dont have a game plan though and dont intend to tell him if I need IUI or IVF - not sure what I will tell him if it comes to that. PLUS if I do get pregnant I am going to need more time off for dr. visits! OY VEY!

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

I think the big thing w/me is the fact that my RE office is about 7 min away from my house & my work is also close by.
I have not & will not tell my bosses what I am going through. I do try to make my appt first thing in the morning & I try to make up the time by working a little late or not taking a lunch break.
Either way, I do get paid but I do it so that I dont need to explain my situation to them b/c they just would not understand.

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

I did explain my situation to my boss (principal).

He was VERRRRRY understanding (good thing too since this has been going on as long as its been.. with times where I've had to take a week off like when I was pregnant with the triplets, was on bedrest, and then had the d&c!)

I think it all depends on the dynamic where you work and mostly your comfort level. I just came right out and said I was dealing with fertility issues and would need the flexibility. I didn't tell him what was gong on at first and he kept asking me if I was alright.. thinking there was something seriously wrong with me since I was asking to leave early so often. I felt like I sort of had to tell so he wouldn't think the worst!!

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

Not sure but I think its illegal for her to tell anyone about your medical issues so if u do tell her perhaps stating that you are sharing in confidence to get the point across? Gl!
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I would consider telling her just so that she knows WHY im missing so much work so she doesnt think I'm slacking- not because I feel that I have to. They are well versed on medical issues with staff, so I know they dont need to know what's going on.

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

Message edited 6/29/2011 5:14:58 PM.

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

I told my kid hating boss and he was surprisingly very supportive and sympathetic.

I do however make up missed time and try to schmooze with his favorite cookies, candy, etc.

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

I told the family that I babysit for before I took the job that getting pregnant was my first priority. My job came second. I went through 3 IVF's while watching 2 kids a 2 yr old and a 4 yr old. After my 2nd IVF I went back right away after my ET and got a BFN. The 3rd time I told the family right away that I was taking a week off after the ET. I had to do what was best for me. I work in Hewlett and my doctor is in Woodbury so there were many days when I had to leave early. I never got paid when I didn't work. I didn't get paid when I was not working so the time that I took off I lost pay. It was hard but the family was very supportive. I was very honest with them and ended up with a BFP in the end. I do special things for the kids and Im always thanking them for the support they gave me.

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

I picked my dr based on hours and if I could get to work. That is why I left one Dr. I ended up going to soemone in the city so I could get to appts before work and still get to work ontime.

As important as getting PG was I couldn't lose my job over it.

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

Are you using Dr. B? If so, he really has the worst hours for an infertility doctor. I use him and have made it work so far (and since I'm a teacher, I'm using the summer wisely!!). But, if it's really stressing you out - perhaps consider switching doctors? I know my friend at work uses one of the large LI practices and she'd get appts as early as 6:45 a.m.

Hang in there.

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

do you have an HR department where you work? Maybe they can give you some advice on what you can do to protect your privacy.

I dont think its illegal for your boss to tell your business but it certainly is not nice.
Instead of telling them that you are going thru IF treatment maybe just tell them you are going thru something and that you want to acknowledge your attendance is important but so is this.

My boss knows I have something going on but not specifically what. And they are not asking. TG

Re: i know i posted about this yesterday but are you missing a lot of work?

I am feeling the same way and I think that I want to change my dr to one in the city. The only thing is I don't think DH is comfortable with going in "the party room" and likes to have his "parties" at home. I don't think you have any obligation to tell your boss something that private. See if you can make up the hours.