I know people don't know any better, but...

We went to a dinner at a friend's house yesterday who had a baby 2 months ago.
She was like you hold the baby, you have to practice. When are you going to have one? Its your turn...
I have to admit it stung a bit, especially as I had just come from my HSG a few hours before.
If it had been just us, and not a bunch of people I would have said something. But I really didn't want to broadcast my problems for everyone. So I just bit my lip and held the baby.

Then a little later in the evening the baby topic came up again and the husband of another couple was talking about them having a baby and was like, "yeah, I figure we'll pop one out in a year and a half at the most." I want to scream at him "YOU DON'T KNOW HOW LONG IT WILL TAKE!!!! YOU DON'T KNOW!!! DON'T BE SO IGNORANT" Considering it was almost a year and a half ago I went of BC, I am proof of that.

Re: I know people don't know any better, but...

It truly amazes me how ignorant people are. I say this all the time, normally the reason why people do not have children is because either A) they cannot B) they are trying and having trouble or C) the don't want them.

Any of the above is truly nobody's business and people should keep their questions to themselves - obviously when a couple is ready to share news, they will. Before that, they are either not ready or have nothing to share!! ARGGGGGGGHHHH

Re: I know people don't know any better, but...

honestly, they just dont get it. Im sorry, it must have been a difficult night for you.

Re: I know people don't know any better, but...

So sorry you had to deal with that.

People can be very ignorant. But in some people's defense, nobody ever thinks infertility will be their problem. I never thought I'd have an issue and BAM here I am. I would even go so far as to say that many men are removed from the thought of IF moreso than women. There are exceptions as we have seen here. I have gone in and out of my RE's office eleventy billion times and each time I see at least 3 or 4 men looking like deer in headlights making their way to the andrology lab to drop off a sample. Their emotional investment, though painful, is very different than ours.

It is hard when people through it in your face whether they understand or not. I went to a bris on Christmas and I was convinced that my ILs would be worried about me because it should be my child soon. I just want to be left alone and deal with things my own way.