I need a professional opinion..Please help.

School related issue....

Can you help me sort this out...

Thank you so much...

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Re: I need a professional opinion..Please help.

Well, I deal with high school girls and not 10-year-olds, but in my experience... some kids are just weird. When they're in high school, the girls try to imitate the most popular girls, and kind of do the same thing as Mary, but not as overtly. They buy the same clothes, same bag, try to have the same friends, follow them around (trying to sit at the same lunch table) etc. Mary just sounds too immature to hide it, and is going overboard. She's a ten-year-old girl so I don't think she's a threat to your daughter. But if your daughter is uncomfortable by all the attention (and I know I would be!) it's perfect that it's the summer now and they don't have to have any GTG's. Maybe they'll be in different classes next year. If not, and the behavior continues, I'd talk to her teacher. But for now, I'd say to ride out the last few days of school, try to ignore Mary over the summer and hope she matures a bit before fall.

Re: I need a professional opinion..Please help.

i replied on the other thread.

Re: I need a professional opinion..Please help.

It seems to me that this girl may have some social/emotional issues. I would not describe a 10 year old as stallerish! She is probably a very needy little girl who is starving for attention/friends and is feeding off of the niceness your DD has shown her. I felt bad for that little girl.

Message edited 6/19/2009 9:52:49 PM.

Re: I need a professional opinion..Please help.

Looking at it from a teacher's POV...Mary could have an social/emotional/developmental issue that you are not aware of. Your daughter may be the only one that is kind to her.

middle school is a real awful time for a lot of kids. hormones are raging...they are beginning to think abstractly (but some not as well as others)...there are feelings of invisibility.

I think let the summer come and they might not even be in the same class(es) next year.


From a parent POV - I think this is the perfect time to praise your daughter for being kind.

Message edited 6/20/2009 10:11:28 AM.

Re: I need a professional opinion..Please help.

Mary sounds just like a girl I have on my caseload. "MY Mary" is severely LD and extremely immature socially. This girl would think nothing of saying the same exact things that Mary said about your daughter. She has a terrible time understanding appropriate social cues. When she was younger, it wasn't so bad because ALL the kids have the same lack of control/inhibitions. But now, "MY Mary" is in 4th grade and dealing with the fallout of her immaturities.

Perhaps contact the school guidance counselor if it continues next year to find out what the deal is.

I don't know what other advice to give you other than to continue teaching your daughter the morals and values you've obviously taught her so far. I cherish girls like your DD because they're the only ones who I can count on to be nice to "MY Mary". It's so hard for them too- they don't want to risk getting made fun of by being nice to Mary, but they KNOW it's the right thing to do. I LAVISH those kids with praise and attention when I can.

Sorry I'm not of much help in guiding you about how to handle the situation- but wanted to tell you thank you for raising such a good kid.

Message edited 6/20/2009 7:23:41 PM.