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I need some advice ,Please

Posted By Message

KartveliT
...

Member since 1/08

8363 total posts

Name:

I need some advice ,Please

Message edited 3/29/2008 8:16:06 AM.

Posted 2/22/08 11:00 AM
 
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2BEANS
wow time is going fast.

Member since 9/07

16106 total posts

Name:
Tina

Re: I need some advice ,Please

Not sure you can do much. If you really dont want to be friends, i would just not talk to her, and maybe shell take the hint and not show up to the christening.

Posted 2/22/08 11:02 AM
 

MsMBV
:P

Member since 5/05

28602 total posts

Name:
Me

Re: I need some advice ,Please

Eek that is tough. I mean you can un-invite her if you really feel strongly about it. I am so sorry that she brought negativity into your home. She sounds like a toxic "friend" and definitely not someone you need in your life with a new baby.

I would wait it out and see what happens. From the way it sounds she might do something severe enough to cause major issue & might not come anyway.

Chat Icon

Posted 2/22/08 11:03 AM
 

Stefanie

Member since 5/05

23599 total posts

Name:
Stefanie

Re: I need some advice ,Please

What kind of negative comments could come out of having a new baby?Chat Icon

I would tell her that the christening has been postponed.Chat Icon

I would NOT want her at the christening at all.

Posted 2/22/08 11:07 AM
 

KartveliT
...

Member since 1/08

8363 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some advice ,Please

Posted by BabySammie

Not sure you can do much. If you really dont want to be friends, i would just not talk to her, and maybe shell take the hint and not show up to the christening.

I thought of doing thatChat Icon but knowing her , she may not take the hint,lol..

Posted 2/22/08 11:08 AM
 

CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!

Member since 5/05

14021 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some advice ,Please

I have a "friend" very similar to you. As far as the christening, there really isn't too much you can do unless you uninvite her but that makes you look bad.

What I have done was slowly stop encouraging and doing the things that make a friendship. I don't do playdates and decline invitations to dinner and whatnot.

Posted 2/22/08 11:22 AM
 

KartveliT
...

Member since 1/08

8363 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some adviSe ,Please

Posted by Stefanie

What kind of negative comments could come out of having a new baby?Chat Icon

I would tell her that the christening has been postponed.Chat Icon

I would NOT want her at the christening at all.

well here are somecomments that she made:
Does your DD have a cross eye? you should get that checked ,when in fact ,my DD doesn't have a cross eye or any eye problem(not that there is anything wrong with that if she did),, and just to let you know my DD has big beautiful eyes and longest eyelashes and people always comment how beautiful they are.
Oh why did you name her a jewish name ,couldn't you think of anything else?(I didn't ask for your opinion about the name)
Your DD doesn't look like a girl , she looks like a little boy.(all babies look the same she is not even 6 months and barely has any hair)
thats just the part of it, she went on and on throughout the day with her stupid comments .

Posted 2/22/08 1:13 PM
 

Stefanie

Member since 5/05

23599 total posts

Name:
Stefanie

Re: I need some adviSe ,Please

Posted by beckywecky

well here are somecomments that she made:
Does your DD have a cross eye? you should get that checked ,when in fact ,my DD doesn't have a cross eye or any eye problem(not that there is anything wrong with that if she did),, and just to let you know my DD has big beautiful eyes and longest eyelashes and people always comment how beautiful they are.
Oh why did you name her a jewish name ,couldn't you think of anything else?(I didn't ask for your opinion about the name)
Your DD doesn't look like a girl , she looks like a little boy.(all babies look the same she is not even 6 months and barely has any hair)
thats just the part of it, she went on and on throughout the day with her stupid comments .



Omg, I would have given her one of these and told her to get out...

External Image

Posted 2/22/08 1:27 PM
 

Babytime
LIF Adolescent

Member since 6/05

659 total posts

Name:
Amy

Re: I need some adviSe ,Please

I know how your feel my bf since kindergartin dd is going to be 11 months she has never seen her and she lives on LI didn't cometo see me at the hospital said she was buzy> Then she has a lot of food allergies so I ordered special food for her for the christing she didn't com b/c the night before was her 3oth birthday and I told her I couldn't go so out of spite she did this. I invite her over all the time she always cancels at the last min I'm just so annoyed she is single and gets mad b/c I don't go out to the clubs with her anytmore she blows me off so I undestand how you feel

Posted 2/22/08 1:28 PM
 

KartveliT
...

Member since 1/08

8363 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some adviSe ,Please

Posted by Stefanie

Posted by beckywecky

well here are somecomments that she made:
Does your DD have a cross eye? you should get that checked ,when in fact ,my DD doesn't have a cross eye or any eye problem(not that there is anything wrong with that if she did),, and just to let you know my DD has big beautiful eyes and longest eyelashes and people always comment how beautiful they are.
Oh why did you name her a jewish name ,couldn't you think of anything else?(I didn't ask for your opinion about the name)
Your DD doesn't look like a girl , she looks like a little boy.(all babies look the same she is not even 6 months and barely has any hair)
thats just the part of it, she went on and on throughout the day with her stupid comments .



Omg, I would have given her one of these and told her to get out...

IMAGE
Oh I wanted to trust me, I don't know what held me back.

Posted 2/22/08 3:28 PM
 

Moehick
Ready for the sun!

Member since 5/05

30339 total posts

Name:
Properly perfect™

Re: I need some adviSe ,Please

Wow...cut her out of your life. Did you send out Christening invites or just verbally invited her? If she doesn't have invitation in hand don't send one. If you already did, all you can do is ignore her till then, ignore her there and then for the rest of your life.

Posted 2/22/08 3:36 PM
 

KartveliT
...

Member since 1/08

8363 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some adviSe ,Please

Posted by Moehick

Wow...cut her out of your life. Did you send out Christening invites or just verbally invited her? If she doesn't have invitation in hand don't send one. If you already did, all you can do is ignore her till then, ignore her there and then for the rest of your life.

THANKS, that is what I told my husband I will be doing, seems like that's the only way.
oh and yes I sent her the inviteChat Icon

Posted 2/22/08 3:39 PM
 

hbugal
Lesigh

Member since 2/07

15928 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some adviSe ,Please

I was in a simular situation when DS was born..I had two separate friends that I had stopped speaking to..both for completely different reasons. Both called to wish me congratulations etc..(they had found out about DS b/c they had run into a very good friend of mine-they didnt even know I was preggo) ANYWAY...I evaluated the calls and realized that only one of them was truly calling to say congrats and the other one was just calling to get some dirt...I chose to ignore her additional phone calls...

On to the Christening issue..While I would dread her attending the Christening I would just let her come and then cut ties...IMO your only other option would be to speak to her directly and uninvite her..I would never be able to do that, Im too chicken.

Posted 2/22/08 3:42 PM
 

lipglossjunky73
My Everything!

Member since 11/05

35670 total posts

Name:
<3

Re: I need some adviSe ,Please

Can you tell her you decided to just have family at the christening and are having it somewhere else? Would she hear from mutual friends about it?

Posted 2/22/08 3:43 PM
 

lipglossjunky73
My Everything!

Member since 11/05

35670 total posts

Name:
<3

Re: I need some advice ,Please

OR... I'm thinking maybe tell her the truth. that her comments hurt you and your not sure you want that type of negativity at your child's christening... maybe she will learn from it...

Posted 2/22/08 3:44 PM
 

KartveliT
...

Member since 1/08

8363 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some advice ,Please

Posted by lipglossjunky73

Can you tell her you decided to just have family at the christening and are having it somewhere else? Would she hear from mutual friends about it?

I 'm not sure , but she mightChat Icon

Posted 2/22/08 3:46 PM
 

Little-J-Mommy
I'm a Big Brother

Member since 5/06

8041 total posts

Name:
D

Re: I need some advice ,Please

Posted by beckywecky

Posted by lipglossjunky73

Can you tell her you decided to just have family at the christening and are having it somewhere else? Would she hear from mutual friends about it?

I 'm not sure , but she mightChat Icon



I might even go so far as to say something about how you are limited to the amount of people you can invite and have unexpected family coming in. I may be too chicken to actually do it though. GLChat Icon

Posted 2/22/08 5:00 PM
 

CookiePuss
Cake from Outer Space!

Member since 5/05

14021 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some advice ,Please

Posted by beckywecky

Posted by Stefanie

What kind of negative comments could come out of having a new baby?Chat Icon

I would tell her that the christening has been postponed.Chat Icon

I would NOT want her at the christening at all.

well here are somecomments that she made:
Does your DD have a cross eye? you should get that checked ,when in fact ,my DD doesn't have a cross eye or any eye problem(not that there is anything wrong with that if she did),, and just to let you know my DD has big beautiful eyes and longest eyelashes and people always comment how beautiful they are.
Oh why did you name her a jewish name ,couldn't you think of anything else?(I didn't ask for your opinion about the name)
Your DD doesn't look like a girl , she looks like a little boy.(all babies look the same she is not even 6 months and barely has any hair)
thats just the part of it, she went on and on throughout the day with her stupid comments .



Based on those comments, I would actually call her out and tell her how hurt you are. Those were mean things to say/ask and can only come from a place of jealousy and unhappiness. I would ask her to not come to the christening as you don't know what to make of your friendship.

Posted 2/22/08 5:06 PM
 

Mrs. Patticakes
SPREAD KINDNESS

Member since 9/06

17330 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some advice ,Please

Posted by beckywecky

Posted by Moehick

Wow...cut her out of your life. Did you send out Christening invites or just verbally invited her? If she doesn't have invitation in hand don't send one. If you already did, all you can do is ignore her till then, ignore her there and then for the rest of your life.

THANKS, that is what I told my husband I will be doing, seems like that's the only way.
oh and yes I sent her the inviteChat Icon



ITA with this...I am really sorry she was such a jerk....I would have thrown her out. WTH is wrong with people?Chat Icon

Posted 2/22/08 5:13 PM
 

partyof6
b nice like u want ur kidz 2

Member since 7/06

7752 total posts

Name:
jeannine

Re: I need some advice ,Please

call her up--tell her her comments were insane and if she cannot keep her mouth shut if she has nothing nice to say then do not come to the christening.

Or...call her and say you know what..your comments left me with my mouth hanging open at the time and the more IOi think about it the more I think u are a be-yotch--I think its best if we go our different ways in the friendship dept.........


ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Posted 2/22/08 5:14 PM
 

KartveliT
...

Member since 1/08

8363 total posts

Name:

Re: I need some advice ,Please

Here is the thing , when she was here making those comments, I did say , what is it with you ?! Why do you keep saying things like that ? She got very defensive, saying that she doesn't mean anything by them and she loves my DD. so I don't think she understood that it is wrong to say hurtful things to people especially your friends, and that's what p... d me off the most.
BTW , my husband did say that she maybe jealous and that's why she can't keep her mouth shut.
I just don't understand how people can be so STUPID AND MEAN.

Posted 2/22/08 5:37 PM
 
 

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