I thought pregnancy was a happy time?

Vent & pity party ahead:

Background: I am 13 1/2 weeks pregnant w/ # 2 after trying for years & several infertility treatments. I am thrilled & thank god every day for blessing us w/ this baby.

The Problem: I am absolutely miserable!

I have really bad PMS & was looking forward to 9 months of PMS free happiness. That didn't happen. I am cranky, moody, emotional & just plain crazy! DH is a saint & does everything but I find the stupidest things that aren't even his fault to yell at him for. DD is an angel but my patience isn't what it should be. I barely want to leave the house or do anything. I am always uncomfortable w/ one problem or another. I have a lot of ms, back pain, cramps, diziness ( I even fainted in public last week, not fun), terrible headaches, a UTI, yeast infection, I already gained 13 pounds ( I started out really small) etc. The doctor knows about everything & the baby is fine. I'm thankful for that but I don't want to feel like this. I am so happy to be pregnant & want to get over myself but can't. I also feel like I'm not being fair to DH or DD. I really hope things start to get better. Has anyone ever felt like this? I feel like I'm stuck in eternal PMS? Does it get better? Thanks for listening!

Re: I thought pregnancy was a happy time?

I'm hoping my crankiness, moodiness and PMS leaves soon because DH is sick and tired of the ups and downs too. I'm 12 weeks and I'm hoping for better weeks to come.
You're not alone. Our hormones are all over the place! What makes you happy or what used to make you happy?
I hope you feel better!!!

Re: I thought pregnancy was a happy time?

Don't worry! I'm right there with you and it's all the hormones and changes your body is going through. I felt that way for the first 14-15 weeks. I HATED being pregnant, I was an emotional wreck, I felt that crud all the time and I just couldn't be happy. Then I would feel so guilty knowing that I am so blessed to have this child growing inside of me, and all the woman out there who would die to be PG and that LOVED, LOVED, LOVED being PG and I was just not one of them.

For me, it definitely got much better when the MS, headaches, food aversion went away and my hormones stabilized. I started to show so I looked PG instead of just fat and I finally felt the baby! Then it began to sink in how wonderful it was to be having a baby. But I still have days where I just hate it! I hate not being able to look down and see what used to be my waist or put something on without thinking that I look like a house, or have a glass of wine, sushi, basically just be ME and not pregnant! But now, most days I am excited.

So, yes, I do think it gets better. And I definitely would not beat yourself up for feeling the way you do. Your body is going through so much right now and noone can understand how it is affecting you. I have found that it helps to surround yourself with people who are excited and can maybe make you feel excited too.

Good luck and feel free to vent. That's what we're here for!

Re: I thought pregnancy was a happy time?

well at least you are aware of your behavior! I hope it gets better soon. I hear ya - I am 7 weeks and miserable and sick all the time. I hate being at work bc I have to play all happy so by the time I get home and am in the worst mood and just dont feel good.

I dont even feel like going out tonight to a friends house but I think DH would be disappointed.

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Re: I thought pregnancy was a happy time?

Re: I thought pregnancy was a happy time?

Glad to hear other feel this way too!! I feel like i am either in a fog, exhaused or sick! I hate when people ask how im feeling, i konw they are being nice, but im sure they dont REALLY want to know what im feeling, so i just say good. big fat lie. I konw it will all be worth it when the baby is born. Im 26 weeks now and i have to admit, you get used to feeling pregnant the further along you are! I not longer feel bad for laying down and resting when I should be getting things done. Hang in there, your NOT alone!

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I think I wrote a very similiar post at the beginning of my pregnancy!! I think it's good you wrote how you feel. I will be honest I very much felt how you did, tack on some additional medical issues and was feeling terrible first trimester. Unfortunately for me, there has never been any relief. Everyone told me second trimester would be great, I'd get a boost of energy and sickness would go away...it never happened. Now here at 37 weeks, I am so far beyond miserable I can't begin to describe it. I will be completely honest and say there are many times I wonder if it will be all worth it, I have never had a baby so I don't yet know. I do know I want this baby more than anything in the world and know how blessed I was to get pregnant but that doesn't mean pregnancy is an easy ride. I cry a lot and stay in bed a lot, my doctor is aware and I am going to be monitored for ppd, it has not been a good time for me and will say it has been the worst 9 1/2 months of my life. I know that sounds harsh but I know I can't be the only one this is a reality for. Many people feel this way, according to my doctor, but I don't think people express it as often as who wants to hear this and it also brings on a sense of guilt, which it definitely did for quite a while for me. I've come to terms with the fact my body and pregnancy are just not a good mix. Fortunately the end is near for me as I am being induced within the next week but I am still having trouble managing on a daily basis. My DH is my rock and it has been trying on him as well to watch me experience this, when he can't take the pain away. I would typically consider myself able to handle adversity very well but this whole pregnancy really threw me for a loop.
All this said, and I didn't mean to hijack your post, I do hope it gets better for you but just be aware for some it doesn't get better and that's ok to. You will find away to make it through, make sure you have the best support system around you, whether its familiy, or friends. It's amazing what we can get through and in the end you will have your precious little one. I found speaking with my doctor and really letting him know my true feelings and the issues I was dealing with on a daily basis was helpful., especially if they are bothering you...never underestimate an ache or pain, you just never know. Good luck and I hope everything works out great for you

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I too am pregnant with #2. My little is 22 months and definately a toddler. In the beginning of this pregnancy (I'm 32 weeks now) I wrote a very similar post. In addition to the moodswings (which I did not have with DS) I was so tired and felt so so sick. I cried all of the time and was angry for about 16 weeks or longer. My emotions were out of control - I didn't even like myself. This did subside and when I think back to how angry and crazy I was I can't believe it. We were so sure that I was havinga girl because I was so different. When we found out it was a boy we were shocked - absolutely shocked.

The stress of a long commute, a toddler, moving into a new house and a husband that was neglectful made me nuts. Things have become better. Now all I feel is the regular emotions and inability to sleep due to discomfort. Good luck. I wrote in a journal to help get everything out. It helped me - maybe it could help you too???

And, I think you will agree because we already have another child - it is really worth it. There is no better feeling than looking at a child that you carried and created. They bring so much joy and amazment.

Message edited 12/31/2007 1:51:50 PM.

Re: I thought pregnancy was a happy time?

I truly appreciate all your responses & your honesty. Thank you so much for your support & helping me get through this difficult time. After reading your posts I don't feel so alone & isolated. Thanks & good luck to everyone.

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I want to add my thoughts to this too. It makes me feel better to see these posts. I wanted a baby so badly, yet I have had such a hard time being pregnant too. I am now 36 weeks. I have been moody, weepy, tired, sick, scared, and the lack of sleep has made me even more irritable during the third trimester.

It is especially hard when DH says that "no one else is like this" and I am using this as an excuse to act however I want. this is not true. prior to pregnancy, my personality was much different. I wish he understood. I am also nervous about PPD.

Re: I thought pregnancy was a happy time?

Thanks for your post!!!
I have had a reallly bad day today..I have not had a day like this and reading this post helped so much..
DH and I have been fighting and having really difficult financial trouble and now the baby on the way..I guess it was all too much and making me so sad...all I did today was lay on the couch, sulk, cry, sob, and then watch more TV.
Sorry to be in the pity party today tooo but I guess we all have those kind of days. Best of Luck for the start of a better New Year!