| Posted By |
Message |
SummerMom
Now a mom of 2!
Member since 6/07 4970 total posts
Name:
|
I yelled at my best friend yesterday
I feel a little guilty about this, and I thought you guys would understand. I've been off the Pill since February and as far as I can tell have not ovulated once. The doc thinks I have PCOS and that I'm going to need help to O and I'm pretty freaked out and nervous, waiting for her to call with blood test results. My best friend was staying with me for the week, so I told her that we're ttc in case I got that phone call. We talked a lot about my fears that something is wrong with me, about how I'm worried I waited too long (I'm almost 32 and want at least 2 kids) to start, etc. She was great.
Yesterday we were chatting about another friend's baby. She told me, "You're so great with the baby. You're going to be such a good mother." I said thanks, sincerely. She went on, telling me that DH and I are a cute couple and we're going to have the cutest kids, and how she hopes our kids have my sense of humor, and how it's going to be so much fun to play with my LO. I started getting uncomfortable. She meant it kindly, but I can't even ovulate right and I'm terrified that it will take me a really long time to get pg. So I tried to change the subject and she told me, "I don't know why you're so tense. You're DEFINITELY going to get pregnant soon." I blew up at her. No, I'm not "definitely" going to get pregnant soon. Maybe, but maybe not for a year and maybe not ever. And I'm worried about it enough, but to hear "definitely" makes every cell in my body rebel with the wrongness of it, and makes me feel a million times worse.
I told her how insensitive that was, and how this is why I haven't told anyone we're ttc. It's pressure enough for us; I don't need to feel like I'm letting down friends and family who think it's "definitely" going to happen soon and that there must be something wrong with me or DH if it doesn't. My friend isn't married and has never ttc so she couldn't understand and I feel bad that I snapped at her, but I was so upset.
Sorry this is so long but I felt guilty and needed to get it off my chest. I did apologize for snapping at my friend and she apologized for making me feel bad and we both felt like cr@p for the day. Ttc sux.
|
Posted 7/9/10 4:01 PM  |
| |
|
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
MrsH2009
Thank you St. Gerard!
Member since 8/09 6631 total posts
Name:
M
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
|
| Posted 7/9/10 4:04 PM |
| |
|
ns1011
I'm wide awake
Member since 4/09 2697 total posts
Name:
Nic
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
It's definitely hard to listen to someone be so nonchalant about something that is causing you so much anguish - especially if that person has no personal experience with the issue.
I know how it feels, but it sounds like your friend was trying to be positive and upbeat for you. Don't beat yourself up too much over it though. You both apologized so it will eventually blow over.
|
| Posted 7/9/10 4:09 PM |
| |
|
keepingsecrets
ridiculously blessed!!
Member since 7/09 1912 total posts
Name:
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
|
| Posted 7/9/10 4:30 PM |
| |
|
AndyNJune
LIF Infant
Member since 5/10 103 total posts
Name:
June
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
People who have never ttc can't really know what it's like so I guess it can come off insensative 
|
| Posted 7/9/10 5:01 PM |
| |
|
|
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
I'm sorry.
|
| Posted 7/9/10 5:07 PM |
| |
|
Harlow-J
Mason's mommy!
Member since 12/09 3623 total posts
Name:
Jen
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
Posted by ns1011
It's definitely hard to listen to someone be so nonchalant about something that is causing you so much anguish - especially if that person has no personal experience with the issue.
I know how it feels, but it sounds like your friend was trying to be positive and upbeat for you. Don't beat yourself up too much over it though. You both apologized so it will eventually blow over.
ITA
|
| Posted 7/9/10 6:13 PM |
| |
|
|
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
It sounds like your friend was trying to be supportive and had the right intentions, but I can see where her comments hurt.
|
| Posted 7/9/10 6:39 PM |
| |
|
babyAin11
LIF Toddler
Member since 7/10 445 total posts
Name:
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
It definitely sounds like your friend was trying to be positive and supportive and knows how much you want to have a DC. I think its very hard for ppl who are not TTC to see things from our perspective and just how sensitive the subject can be. I am sure she meant well
|
| Posted 7/9/10 8:30 PM |
| |
|
BeachGal
LIF Adult
Member since 2/10 2827 total posts
Name:
J
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
That would have annoyed me too, even with the best intentions. I'm glad you made up right away. My DH is like that in a way, he doesnt think that it will "never" happen even though you never know.
|
| Posted 7/9/10 9:16 PM |
| |
|
ostrichhh
LIF Infant
Member since 5/08 301 total posts
Name:
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
aw. im sorry this happened and im glad you both cleared the air. youll feel better about this soon. 
|
| Posted 7/9/10 9:58 PM |
| |
|
SummerMom
Now a mom of 2!
Member since 6/07 4970 total posts
Name:
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
Thank you all. I was kind of feeling like a jerk and just needed to vent to people who would understand.
I was glad that I actually said something right away, though, instead of just stewing about it and getting angrier. You guys are right; she was trying to be positive and meant well. I'm just especially on edge waiting for these test results from the GYN on top of everything.
But seriously, I'm not telling anyone else about ttc, not even my sister. I've learned my lesson.
|
| Posted 7/9/10 10:07 PM |
| |
|
MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name:
Kerri
|
Re: I yelled at my best friend yesterday
Posted by Harlow-J
Posted by ns1011
It's definitely hard to listen to someone be so nonchalant about something that is causing you so much anguish - especially if that person has no personal experience with the issue.
I know how it feels, but it sounds like your friend was trying to be positive and upbeat for you. Don't beat yourself up too much over it though. You both apologized so it will eventually blow over.
ITA
I agree too. I know just where you are coming from.
|
| Posted 7/9/10 11:16 PM |
| |
|
