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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by BaseballWidow
Guess I don't see why it should be taken personally. No one has been called out by name.
I don't think anything needs to be named directly to a certain person for it to be taken personally. I think that's just semantics.
Whenever you read something, if you feel it pertains to you or your life, you identify with it and it can hit "close to home." Just because you aren't named, doesn't mean you don't have a right to feel something about it.
If a post was started on whatever board, and titled "Childless by Choice---Empty shallow lives" where the poster went on to say that anyone who chooses to NOT have children, are just empty shallow souls, who will never really know the JOY of children, that they think its DISGUSTING to never choose to have a child and those who make that choice are selfish @ssholes for not giving the world the gift of life and so on and so forth.....how much do you wanna bet people from this board who are CF by choice, would run to it and raise hell?
They would have every right to, because they may not be named specifically, but they can certainly feel something personal about it and get upset.
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Posted 1/21/10 2:01 PM  |
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stickydust
Now a mommy of 2!!!
Member since 4/06 3164 total posts
Name:
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by stickydust
As to why people come here who do not "belong" here - come on, this board always has great fodder for drama
Glad my life is so amusing for others. I'd like to see what would happen if I posted that stance on parenting or pregnancy?
Oh please...I was trying to lighten the mood a little. But the truth is whether by design or not this board ha had more than its share of controversial posts.
Regardless, I aplogize if you took my post to in any way belittle you. My intent was merely to keep things light.
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| Posted 1/21/10 2:01 PM |
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stickydust
Now a mommy of 2!!!
Member since 4/06 3164 total posts
Name:
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by stickydust
Also, I don't understand why people are surprised that drama ensues - this is LIF. We can create drama out of icicle lights!!
As I have said before (as have others) it just has to do with asking for some respect here in a little corner of the world for those of us without kids.
That is fine and you all deserve it - but that is not carte blanche to disrespect the lives of others and to use this board as a vehicle to knowingly do so.
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| Posted 1/21/10 2:05 PM |
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smdl
I love Gary too..on a plate!
Member since 5/06 32461 total posts
Name:
me
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by stickydust
As to why people come here who do not "belong" here - come on, this board always has great fodder for drama
Glad my life is so amusing for others. I'd like to see what would happen if I posted that stance on parenting or pregnancy?
Nobody came here to tell you about why you were CF or why not.
The poster posted on being annoyed by a stroller in public transportations. Almost like she did not belong there. Then comments were made that the stroller should be smaller, the kid should be walking, etc.. What does have to do with CF? People from the "other side" will surely come and comment on a stroller post.
Just like you "should not" go to the parenting or PG board to bash people who have kids just because they have kids or want them. But you are welcome to come on the parenting board anytime even if you don't have kids.
I was fully supportive on the CF board.
But I cannot agree that it's a free for all for "some" to bash people with kids. Just like the parenting board is NOT a free for all to bash those who do not have children. Most of us, parents, will not participate in this bashing.
It's not just about that thread. It's becoming a common occurrence.
Yes, enjoy your board but not at the expense of others.
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| Posted 1/21/10 2:14 PM |
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Nifheim
allo
Member since 1/09 5476 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: I'm curious
blah
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| Posted 1/21/10 2:18 PM |
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by smdl
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by stickydust
As to why people come here who do not "belong" here - come on, this board always has great fodder for drama
Glad my life is so amusing for others. I'd like to see what would happen if I posted that stance on parenting or pregnancy?
Nobody came here to tell you about why you were CF or why not.
The poster posted on being annoyed by a stroller in public transportations. Almost like she did not belong there. Then comments were made that the stroller should be smaller, the kid should be walking, etc.. What does have to do with CF? People from the "other side" will surely come and comment on a stroller post.
Just like you "should not" go to the parenting or PG board to bash people who have kids just because they have kids or want them. But you are welcome to come on the parenting board anytime even if you don't have kids.
I was fully supportive on the CF board.
But I cannot agree that it's a free for all for "some" to bash people with kids. Just like the parenting board is NOT a free for all to bash those who do not have children. Most of us, parents, will not participate in this bashing.
It's not just about that thread. It's becoming a common occurrence.
Yes, enjoy your board but not at the expense of others.
ITA with this and with MrsPBJ-I just don't want to make 5 gazillion posts.
The stroller post struck a chord. Why should people feel bad because they have a stroller? I was on crutches once with two work bags and needed the subway-should I have been kicked off because I was taking too much space and too much time getting on and off? Not every mommy has the luxury of being able to afford cabs or drivers. There was nothing productive about that post-it was hurtful...And as far as I am concerned, DH and I are still, as of today, a CF. So really, I voiced a contrary opinion and got flamed for it.
I remember this board was developed when I was TTC. I thought it would be fun, like the NW board on LIW. I thought we would just have conversations about nothing and maybe get a suggestion or two about life as a twosome or fun places to vacay. Then it turned immediately to a child bashing fest and I felt alienated.
If you want to bash people who have kids/want kids/etc, FM each other and no one will say a word. But if you think you can do it in a OPEN PUBLIC forum, nope-you will get people that want to defend themselves.
This has nothing to do with being CF and if there was a derogatory thread on a parenting board about CF families, I would fully expect you to go and defend yourself as well. Being mean either way is not right.
And for the record, I have friends on this board and IRL who are CF by choice and I fully respect and support their decisions. I never thought any less of anyone for being childless, as I still am for another 5 weeks! And birth does not cause amnesia. I will never say your time is not worth as much as mine, etc. But don't bash me for who I am and tell me where I can and can't post. If I feel attacked, I will defend myself and I would expect you to do the same.
When other CF girls are telling you the same thing-listen!
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| Posted 1/21/10 2:32 PM |
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Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!
Member since 10/05 29450 total posts
Name:
Diana
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Re: I'm curious
I will answer the OP at hand and try not to get carried away or go off topic too much.
I think that people assume "Hate" because honestly, that's the way 95% of these posts come off.
I completely understand and respect the fact that people want to live a Childfree life. I never ever would question anyone about it. Raising a child is hard work and not easy at all. I can understand reasons why people would not choose that as a life choice.
But, what I don't understand is the disdain that seems to radiate from this board about people with children. I read that Subway thread and wanted to respond but decided to respect your board (and I am only responding now bc the OP asked a ?).
But, in all honesty, that thread was out of control. What are mothers who live in the city supposed to do with their strollers? Strap them to their backs and carry the kid also, just so that it's not in someone's way? Anyone who rides the subway knows they are going to be inconvienced by someone - whether it be a woman with shopping bags - or a smelly azz man sitting next to you when there are empty seats on the train. It's like SOME (not all) CF posters just pick on every single little thing that a parent does.
I'm sure that if this was a post where a CF poster wanted to meet up with her friend (and child) for lunch in the city - and her friend responded "I don't want to lug my stroller on the subway" the CF poster would come on here to bash the friend because she didn't want to accomodate her.
It's almost like parents can't win with anything that we do.
And, I get that this is your "safe haven" but I think that when you are openly bashing group of people on this site you have to expect that people are going to come on to defend themselves.
Message edited 1/21/2010 2:36:27 PM.
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| Posted 1/21/10 2:35 PM |
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Nifheim
allo
Member since 1/09 5476 total posts
Name:
Jennifer
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Re: I'm curious
<singing> all you need is love
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| Posted 1/21/10 2:45 PM |
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BunnyWife
Insert Witty Comment Here
Member since 5/07 8274 total posts
Name:
BunnyWife
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by Nifheim
<singing> all you need is love
All together now!
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| Posted 1/21/10 2:48 PM |
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by BunnyWife
Posted by Nifheim
<singing> all you need is love
All together now!
Next is "I'd like to buy the world a coke"
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| Posted 1/21/10 2:50 PM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: I'm curious
Well, I see nothing has changed.
And the irony in some of the posts on this board is OOC. Parents and CF alike. 
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| Posted 1/22/10 11:28 AM |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name:
Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by Kara
Well, I see nothing has changed.
And the irony in some of the posts on this board is OOC. Parents and CF alike.
]
what is OOC??  I thought I was hip with all the codes...
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| Posted 1/22/10 11:37 AM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by Lisa
Posted by Kara
Well, I see nothing has changed.
And the irony in some of the posts on this board is OOC. Parents and CF alike.
]
what is OOC?? I thought I was hip with all the codes...
Out Of Control
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| Posted 1/22/10 11:38 AM |
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MeNBobs
*****
Member since 4/07 3765 total posts
Name:
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by MrsPJB2007
Posted by Lisa
Posted by Kara
Well, I see nothing has changed.
And the irony in some of the posts on this board is OOC. Parents and CF alike.
]
what is OOC?? I thought I was hip with all the codes...
Out Of Control
For me it's alway out of cash.
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| Posted 1/22/10 1:59 PM |
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LightUpOurLife
Totally in love
Member since 8/06 12785 total posts
Name:
Bonnie-Jean
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by DiamondGirl
Let's be honest with one and other. People write things that they KNOW will infuriate others and then look around like "WHO ME?"
I agree with this so much.
Right now I am having a tiff with my sister because my 16yo niece keeps slamming teachers and how awful they are, blah blah blah. My DH is a teacher. I really feel it is a deliberate jab pointed at him as well. My sister joined in the drama on FB and it became a bash-fest.
The same thing happens over and over here too. Making a jab at a parent is making a jab at a parent. Period.
Message edited 1/22/2010 2:05:50 PM.
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| Posted 1/22/10 2:03 PM |
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MrsPJB2007
MBA at your service!
Member since 7/06 12020 total posts
Name:
MJ
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by MeNBobs
For me it's alway out of cash.
That's cause of the crazy amount of hair gel you need to purchase for your man's ever increasing hair length.
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| Posted 1/22/10 2:23 PM |
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by BJandDan
The same thing happens over and over here too. Making a jab at a parent is making a jab at a parent. Period.
This is where I disagree and I am obviously in the minority in my opinion on it. If *I* have a crappy cashier and b*itch about her, *I* am not b*itching about all cashiers. If someone says something rude about a fat person, *I* don't take it personally since it wasn't directed toward me. I'm glad it has been pointed out to me that so many people takes things personally and that the train of thought is that things are said with a sweeping generalization. It explains a lot...not my POV but seems like it is to many.
(And I am saying this nicely and with sincerity in case that gets lost via the internet).
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| Posted 1/22/10 2:38 PM |
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MeNBobs
*****
Member since 4/07 3765 total posts
Name:
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by BaseballWidow
Posted by BJandDan
The same thing happens over and over here too. Making a jab at a parent is making a jab at a parent. Period.
This is where I disagree and I am obviously in the minority in my opinion on it. If *I* have a crappy cashier and b*itch about her, *I* am not b*itching about all cashiers. If someone says something rude about a fat person, *I* don't take it personally since it wasn't directed toward me. I'm glad it has been pointed out to me that so many people takes things personally and that the train of thought is that things are said with a sweeping generalization. It explains a lot...not my POV but seems like it is to many.
(And I am saying this nicely and with sincerity in case that gets lost via the internet).
If you were complaining about a biotchy cashier you are complaining about her personality not the fact that she is a cashier. So it's not a broad blanket vent about all cashiers. The vent from yesterday was more about people with carriages on the subway. Some people have no choice but to get on the subway with a carriage. Short of making it hover abover her head it sounded like that woman did all she could not to get in anyone's way. I think that was where the problem came along. I can't ride the subway since I'm OOC.
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| Posted 1/22/10 3:14 PM |
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by MeNBobs
I can't ride the subway since I'm OOC.
I don't think you're missing much though!
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| Posted 1/22/10 3:31 PM |
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Mushesgirl
Too blessed to be stressed
Member since 4/09 6691 total posts
Name:
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Re: I'm curious
Why someone venting on this board leads to ASSumptions of hating?
I have no idea. I posted about the subway because I was venting about a specific situation. I was NOT trying to create drama in any way shape or form; just express myself,which apparantly some parents feel is out of line, directed at all parents of the entire world, and take very personally, and should not be allowed! WHY?? I don't get it. But I will continue to post whatever irks me, and could care less about being called self-absorbed or rude just because i'm posting a vent. If someone were bashing the CF on Parenting that's just fine with me. I'm not offended. Go ahead and say what you want, i'd never, ever feel the need to go defend myself. I don't defend myself to anyone because i'm secure in who I am and I don't answer to anyone.
Can someone also explain to me why any parent would read anything on here? I've said before I never ever go on Parenting because it just doesn't pertain to me; but if I had a specific question i'd go there. Why take something said about a situation that has nothing to do with you personally, so personally? I've been hit by strollers in shopping malls, in the supermarket, on a sidewalk for god's sake! I didn't vent about that. Nor did I vent about the bikes, wagons, luggage, laptops, elbows to the boob (yes true story and I fought with the woman over it) i've been hit with on the train! I didn't say "UGH those parents again I just hate 'em all!"
Message edited 1/22/2010 6:41:44 PM.
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| Posted 1/22/10 6:37 PM |
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SuchIsLife
LIF Adolescent
Member since 12/05 689 total posts
Name:
no
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Re: I'm curious
I can't even begin to make heads or tails of the constant thread wars here on CF. Makes for some interesting/amusing reading though. Such thin skins among the LIFers. I could have predicted the reactions.
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| Posted 1/22/10 9:19 PM |
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BunnyWife
Insert Witty Comment Here
Member since 5/07 8274 total posts
Name:
BunnyWife
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by SuchIsLife
I can't even begin to make heads or tails of the constant thread wars here on CF. Makes for some interesting/amusing reading though. Such thin skins among the LIFers. I could have predicted the reactions.
Couldn't agree more. People need to relax a bit. The next time someone complains about their infant not sleeping or their husbands snoring I will assume they hate all infants and men
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| Posted 1/22/10 9:39 PM |
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MrsYank
She's here :)
Member since 4/07 3238 total posts
Name:
Mrs. Yank
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Re: I'm curious
I want a baby
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| Posted 1/22/10 9:47 PM |
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Re: I'm curious
Posted by BunnyWife
Couldn't agree more. People need to relax a bit. The next time someone complains about their infant not sleeping or their husbands snoring I will assume they hate all infants and men
Thank you! Exactly what I asked in the OP!! 
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| Posted 1/22/10 10:17 PM |
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LINewbie
Tigger the the Rescue!
Member since 8/08 5647 total posts
Name:
LB
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Re: I'm curious
Honestly, the 1000 degree turnaround that some people experience after they have children is one of the things that makes me pause when I think about having children. I don't want to turn into my child can do no harm, how can you even be alive without your own child... I don't want to become intolerant. And wanting to be a mom ever since I was very little, I'm scared that I'll turn into crazy mom! I've seen it with friends, and I have seen it on this board too.
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| Posted 1/22/10 10:45 PM |
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