| Posted By |
Message |
jerseypanda
Life is good.
Member since 1/07 9164 total posts
Name:
Amanda
|
Important Advice for Women... (long but worth the read)
My friend sent this to me and I thought it was great:
Do you have feelings of inadequacy?
Do you suffer from shyness?
Do you sometimes wish you were more assertive?
If you answered yes to any of these questions, ask your doctor or pharmacist
about Chardonnay.
Chardonnay is the safe, natural way to feel better and more confident about yourself and your actions. Chardonnay can help ease you out of your shyness and let you tell the world that you're ready and willing to do just about anything.
You will notice the benefits of Chardonnay almost immediately, and with a regimen of regular doses, you can overcome any obstacles that prevent you from living the life you want to live. Shyness and awkwardness will be a thing of the past, and you will discover many talents you never knew you had. Stop hiding and start living.
Chardonnay may not be right for everyone. Women who are pregnant or nursing should not use Chardonnay. However, women who wouldn't mind nursing or becoming pregnant are encouraged to try it.
Side effects may include dizziness, nausea, vomiting, incarceration, erotic
lustfulness, loss of motor control, loss of clothing, loss of money, loss of virginity, delusions of grandeur, table dancing, headache, dehydration, dry mouth, and a desire to sing Karaoke and play all-night rounds of Strip Poker, Truth Or Dare and Naked Twister!
WARNINGS: -
* The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to think you can sing.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
* The consumption of Chardonnay may create the illusion that you are tougher,
smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
|
Posted 10/30/08 2:16 PM  |
| |
|
Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
HeatherRose
Life is Good :)
Member since 11/07 6605 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Important Advice for Women... (long but worth the read)
 
|
| Posted 10/30/08 2:17 PM |
| |
|
sweetdreamz1181
Baby Girl on the way!
Member since 1/08 2186 total posts
Name:
Jackie
|
Re: Important Advice for Women... (long but worth the read)
|
| Posted 10/30/08 2:18 PM |
| |
|
MetsGirl07
LIF O2 Vendor
Member since 12/07 16202 total posts
Name:
Deanna
|
Re: Important Advice for Women... (long but worth the read)
|
| Posted 10/30/08 2:18 PM |
| |
|
lucyloo
nope
Member since 1/06 9758 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Important Advice for Women... (long but worth the read)
Posted by jerseypanda
* The consumption of Chardonnay may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.
This would be me 
|
| Posted 10/30/08 2:18 PM |
| |
|
MrsERod
Praying for Everyone.
Member since 5/05 26170 total posts
Name:
MrsERod™®
|
Re: Important Advice for Women... (long but worth the read)
|
| Posted 10/30/08 2:19 PM |
| |
|
Ophelia
she's baaccckkkk ;)
Member since 5/06 23378 total posts
Name:
remember, when Gulliver traveled....
|
Re: Important Advice for Women... (long but worth the read)
make it ANY other white and we got a party!
|
| Posted 10/30/08 2:21 PM |
| |
|
jerseypanda
Life is good.
Member since 1/07 9164 total posts
Name:
Amanda
|
Re: Important Advice for Women... (long but worth the read)
Posted by Ophelia
make it ANY other white and we got a party!
I'm pretty sure you could substitute Chardonay with any generic brand of Merlot or Chianti or anything else you prefer and get the same results!
|
| Posted 10/30/08 2:23 PM |
| |
|
isabelle2137
LIF Adult
Member since 12/06 1076 total posts
Name:
|
Re: Important Advice for Women... (long but worth the read)
Man, I want some wine.
I love my growing baby, but if only there were a way to enjoy both....
ETA: I think the op is hilarious
Message edited 10/30/2008 3:02:34 PM.
|
| Posted 10/30/08 3:02 PM |
| |
|
