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I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

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Disneygirl
Disney cruise bound!

Member since 5/05

8126 total posts

Name:
D

I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

So it looks like I have to choose between one of my best friends and my SIL to be at my shower and I blame it all on my brother (whom I love but I just hate him right now for being a typical man)!!!
The friend in question is someone I grew up with. I've known her all my life but we became really close friends in high school. She was my MOH at my wedding. Now I will admit over the last few years we have grown apart we only speak every couple of months now but I still consider her a good friend. Some time back, my brother and my friend dated briefly. I knew they were a wrong match from the start but I never said anything it wasn't my place and I just hoped things wouldn't end badly. Not exactly the case. My brother had met his now wife while still dating my best friend and you can imagine things got a little ugly for awhile. Well all that happened about 2yrs ago and unfortunately both my SIL and my friend are very insecure people so you can say they pretty much hate each other. Now fast forward to yesterday my SIL calls up my mom crying saying that if this friend comes to my shower she doesn't think she'll be able to attend. Apparently whenever she becomes a topic of conversation it leads to a big fight between my brother and SIL. However it is my mother and sil who are planning this whole thing so how can I not come to the shower after planning it. At the same token how can I not invite my one of my oldest and dearest friend! Both of these women mean a lot to me. I feel like I'm stuck between a rock and a hard placeChat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon
Ok vent over thanks for listening. Chat Icon

Posted 6/3/06 12:33 PM
 
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justme1
Proud SAHM

Member since 5/05

1955 total posts

Name:
Jodi

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Jeez, Im sorry but I really wish your SIL could **** this up for a few hours to make YOU happy. I know family should come first but just being that SHE is the one with the problem I would tell her you intend to invite both friend and her and thats her choice if she thinks even as an adult she cant handle it.

I wouldnt not send an invite to both..
Sorry
Chat Icon

Posted 6/3/06 12:40 PM
 

wowcoulditbe
wow, pic is already 1 yr old!!

Member since 1/06

6689 total posts

Name:
D

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

not sure what to tell you - try and enjoy the day no matter what - maybe you can have a seperate speical day with the person who doesn't come..its a shame they can't put aside differences for one day to celebrate you and your baby! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/3/06 12:42 PM
 

mrsmck
Be a big girl!

Member since 5/05

4898 total posts

Name:
Donna

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

I'm just a lurker, but I think your SIL needs to grow up a little. Since it's your shower, you should be able to invite anyone you want.

Good luck!! Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/3/06 12:43 PM
 

Stacey1403
Where it all began....

Member since 5/05

24065 total posts

Name:

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Posted by mrsmck

I'm just a lurker, but I think your SIL needs to grow up a little. Since it's your shower, you should be able to invite anyone you want.

Good luck!! Chat Icon Chat Icon



I agree both of the woman can sit completely apart from each other and realize this day has NOTHING to do with them but it is about your big day and the birth a a beautiful babyChat Icon

Posted 6/3/06 1:19 PM
 

Sharon
So Big... So Fast!

Member since 5/05

2959 total posts

Name:

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Posted by Stacey1403

Posted by mrsmck

I'm just a lurker, but I think your SIL needs to grow up a little. Since it's your shower, you should be able to invite anyone you want.

Good luck!! Chat Icon Chat Icon



I agree both of the woman can sit completely apart from each other and realize this day has NOTHING to do with them but it is about your big day and the birth a a beautiful babyChat Icon



I agree! i would invite both and hope they are grown up enough to kow the day is not about them.

Posted 6/3/06 1:29 PM
 

Ali1
Mommy

Member since 8/05

3116 total posts

Name:

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

I agree too...you shower is not about either of these people and I have had events where people have come who don't like other people, but come because of me (or DH). Invite both of them, if the SIL or friend is being childish and does not want to come, then let them be. THey should grow and get over it and nut hurt you in the process....

Posted 6/3/06 2:29 PM
 

LisaW
Time for me to FLY!

Member since 5/05

13199 total posts

Name:
Did I ever tell you that I hate people?

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Posted by mrsmck

I'm just a lurker, but I think your SIL needs to grow up a little. Since it's your shower, you should be able to invite anyone you want.

Good luck!! Chat Icon Chat Icon



I also agree!!

I dated my best friend's brother for 4 years and we broke up over 15 years ago. His wife causes a stink anytime BF has a function (bridal shower, baby shower, now 1st birthday) and I am invited. It is absolutely insane!!!! Grow up!!! I am friends with my DH's ex wife for G-d's sake!!!!!!!!! Act like an adult!!!!!

Have your party and if SIL is so immature that she will try to make this day about her, then she doesn't need to be there!!!!!

Good luck Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/3/06 2:35 PM
 

Diane
Hope is Contagious....catch it

Member since 5/05

30683 total posts

Name:
D

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Posted by mrsmck

I'm just a lurker, but I think your SIL needs to grow up a little. Since it's your shower, you should be able to invite anyone you want.

Good luck!! Chat Icon Chat Icon



I agree......its not like they have to sit at the same tabel. Invite both and let THEM deal with it. Why should YOU have to be stuck in the middle of something that is NOT YOUR faultChat Icon

Posted 6/3/06 2:40 PM
 

bunny
LIF Infant

Member since 2/06

182 total posts

Name:

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Definitely invite both. Your friend would be really hurt I think to find out that she missed this important time in your life. Your SIL has to get over it and realize that this is not about her, it's your day. The rest is her problem.

Posted 6/3/06 3:00 PM
 

04bride
I'm a big sister!!!

Member since 5/05

6707 total posts

Name:
Noel

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

this may sound harsh but invite them both, tell the you wil lsit them far apart but also tell them to grow up and you are NOT in HS anymore and you want to enjoy your shower and not deal with this drama! Sorry you are going trhough this!

Posted 6/3/06 3:05 PM
 

dawnygirl25
Growing up soo fast..

Member since 1/06

14917 total posts

Name:
Dawn

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

I am sorry you have to go through this. why does it always seem there is drama when theres a shower coming up?? Its so unfair. (I had drama also!)

I agree with Stacey ---they both need to realize that this is a special time yo celebrate the baby you are bringing into this world. they dont need to sit anywhere near each other or talk or anything...but they need to be grown ups and be in the same room, for your sake.

good luck.Chat Icon

Posted 6/3/06 3:41 PM
 

CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(

Member since 5/05

13848 total posts

Name:
Christine

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Sounds like we all agree- your SIL needs to grow up and realize this is about YOU, not her.

But I have one of those and its almost impossible. Invite who you want and enjoy the day- ignore the drama!Chat Icon

Posted 6/3/06 4:21 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

Member since 9/05

18504 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Posted by mrsmck

I'm just a lurker, but I think your SIL needs to grow up a little. Since it's your shower, you should be able to invite anyone you want.

Good luck!! Chat Icon Chat Icon



I was going to say the same thing. She needs to put her own feelings aside for a couple of hours.

Posted 6/3/06 4:55 PM
 

bklyngirl
COULD THIS BE MY YEAR??

Member since 6/05

15758 total posts

Name:
Gail

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

sorry you're going through this. can they put there differences aside for one day for u

Posted 6/3/06 4:57 PM
 

michele31
LIF Adult

Member since 5/05

3372 total posts

Name:
Michele

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

I would NOT chose at all. This is THEIR problem, not yours. Invite both. If your SIL cannot be an adult and attend your shower with your friend there than that is HER choice. I think it is unfair and totally wrong to even suggest you not invite your MOH and one of your closest friends to your shower.
JMO, of course but this is soooo not worth your stress. I have a feeling your SIL will **** it up and attend.

Posted 6/4/06 12:04 AM
 

jenny
L O V E

Member since 4/06

2784 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

You want them both there so you you should not choose. It sounds as if your SIL has some groing up to do. She obviouly "won" in the battle over your brother so she should not be so insecure at this point.

Hope everything works out for you. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 6/4/06 9:17 AM
 

armeewife0514
LIF Infant

Member since 7/06

366 total posts

Name:
Tiffany

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

I have the perfect solution. Tell them both to GROW UP!!!!! Your SIL is married to him this shouldn't be an issue. Your friend is over him still shouldn't be an issue. Tell them to stay on opposite sides of the room and not to even look at each other. One of our best friends is dating my hubby's ex. She was a part of his life for four years. She and I couldn't stand each other. So when they got married and my hubby was best man. I put on a smile wished them congrats and got over it. I got my man and she got her's. People I swear are still in high school

Posted 10/10/07 10:09 AM
 

Theresa05
Sofialiciciousssssssssssss

Member since 10/06

4891 total posts

Name:

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

tell them to grow up.. its so pathetic...

I have some kind of the same drama.. if they BOTH can't be there for you.

TELL Them to stay home
how immature and pathetic..


why did she even marry your brother if she can't get over his PAST SEX LIFE


Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 10/10/07 10:22 AM
 

jellybean78
:)

Member since 8/06

13103 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Posted by Ali1

I agree too...you shower is not about either of these people and I have had events where people have come who don't like other people, but come because of me (or DH). Invite both of them, if the SIL or friend is being childish and does not want to come, then let them be. THey should grow and get over it and nut hurt you in the process....



ITA. You shouldn't have to choose. This baby shower is for you and they can s u c k it up one day and just tolerate each other. It's not like they have to sit at the same table or anything.

Posted 10/10/07 10:23 AM
 

Salason

Member since 6/05

9878 total posts

Name:

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

another bumped post from 2006 Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 10/10/07 10:49 AM
 

Disneygirl
Disney cruise bound!

Member since 5/05

8126 total posts

Name:
D

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

Posted by armeewife0514

I have the perfect solution. Tell them both to GROW UP!!!!! Your SIL is married to him this shouldn't be an issue. Your friend is over him still shouldn't be an issue. Tell them to stay on opposite sides of the room and not to even look at each other. One of our best friends is dating my hubby's ex. She was a part of his life for four years. She and I couldn't stand each other. So when they got married and my hubby was best man. I put on a smile wished them congrats and got over it. I got my man and she got her's. People I swear are still in high school



Umm yeah thanks for the advice but being that this was a year and a half ago the situation has been resolved. Chat Icon

P.S. Just to further clear things up I am not preggo again! Chat Icon

Message edited 10/10/2007 11:50:03 AM.

Posted 10/10/07 11:48 AM
 

Mommy2Boys
My Boys!!!!

Member since 6/06

14437 total posts

Name:
C

Re: I've got baby shower drama(long vent)

I agree......its not like they have to sit at the same tabel. Invite both and let THEM deal with it. Why should YOU have to be stuck in the middle of something that is NOT YOUR fault




ITA!! It's not your fault your SIL is insecure.


ETA: SORRY I JUST REALIZED THIS WAS FROM 2006! Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon WHY IS THIS POST EVEN STILL HERE?

Message edited 10/10/2007 11:49:52 PM.

Posted 10/10/07 11:48 PM
 
 

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