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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A
Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Just when I think things are looking up
I went to see Freddy today. I spent 2.5 hrs there talking about all kinds of stuff. I got a recommendation about games we can play with him when he's not in therapy to keep his mind going.
We talked about him going home and how it stinks to be in the hospital so long and we looked at the thing that goes on his leg before the prosthesis..etc.
Mom called him no more than 30 minutes after I left. He didn't remember I was there.
I know, his memory loss is the biggest cognitive problem, it could be worse. He has a ways to go yet...yep I get it.
I feel like I'm knocking my brains out. I was going to go out tonight and buy some stuff to make meatballs and some veal for him so on Sunday I could bring him something homemade. He loved the idea. He won't remember. Sometimes he does though...
I feel so bad for him. he knows his head is messed up. he's lonely, frustrated and has one leg.
Geez, poor guy!
eta: thanks for letting me get it out..
Message edited 7/20/2007 8:47:26 PM.
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Posted 7/20/07 8:45 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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Shroggie
Don't Worry...Be Happy
Member since 5/06 6261 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
You're a wonderful person for doing everything you are for him.
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| Posted 7/20/07 8:58 PM |
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daisy
Be happy
Member since 5/06 1359 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
I do not know all the details, but have kept up on some posts and you are a great person to be there for him with support, love and patience. It is a hard situation, but each day is a new one!
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| Posted 7/20/07 8:59 PM |
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Reese32
LIF Adult
Member since 7/07 3631 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
You have FM
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| Posted 7/20/07 9:01 PM |
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CunningOne
***
Member since 5/05 26975 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
you are a wonderful sister and deep down he knows that! I think you are doing everything that you can, hang in there!
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| Posted 7/20/07 9:06 PM |
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TreAnt427
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Member since 8/06 8652 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
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| Posted 7/20/07 9:09 PM |
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MsSissy
xoxoxo
Member since 3/07 39159 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
Susan...if you remind him of your conversations or your visits does he than remember them? Do you take pictures of your visits with him?
That's how we had to handle DH for a long time. It was very repetitive, I would have the same conversations over and over again, but eventually it all started to come back.
I know it's hard. But hang in there you're doing a wonderful thing. 
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| Posted 7/21/07 12:45 AM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name:
The cure IS worse!
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
I know he is going thru physical therapy but is he meeting with a psychologist? or a phsciatrist? even a social worker at the hospital?
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| Posted 7/21/07 12:55 AM |
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
I know it must be frustrating but you ARE doing amazing things for your brother! Hang in there!
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| Posted 7/21/07 1:08 AM |
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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A
Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
Posted by DebG
I know he is going thru physical therapy but is he meeting with a psychologist? or a phsciatrist? even a social worker at the hospital?
He does work with all therapists, occupational, cognitive, speech, recreational and physical. His doctor is a physiatrist and great. the neuropsychologist is great to but Fred is not ready for talk therapy yet. He can't piece one session to another session yet. The social worker in hospitals are not clinical, they handle the case and not the one on one.
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| Posted 7/21/07 8:43 AM |
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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A
Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
Posted by Mssissy
Susan...if you remind him of your conversations or your visits does he than remember them? Do you take pictures of your visits with him?
That's how we had to handle DH for a long time. It was very repetitive, I would have the same conversations over and over again, but eventually it all started to come back.
I know it's hard. But hang in there you're doing a wonderful thing.
I do remind him of our talks. He does remember some things but not others. It seems like he can remember something from a few days ago but not something from that day.
I should take pictures and I do have the same convos over and over again..I guess that's why he's remembering things from a few weeks or days ago. he thought he saw my dad a few times but dad is in AZ. I think he still remembers when they were here a few weeks ago. I guess it's good that he has dad on his mind. he knows he's not right. He is accepting his limitations. Things are changing with him. I had a whole convo about my house and a potential apartment with him and then 20 minutes later I brought it up and he remembered.
This must be so frustrating for him. Being in the hospital for so long just blows.
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| Posted 7/21/07 8:47 AM |
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MsSissy
xoxoxo
Member since 3/07 39159 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
Posted by Blu-ize
Posted by Mssissy
Susan...if you remind him of your conversations or your visits does he than remember them? Do you take pictures of your visits with him?
That's how we had to handle DH for a long time. It was very repetitive, I would have the same conversations over and over again, but eventually it all started to come back.
I know it's hard. But hang in there you're doing a wonderful thing.
I do remind him of our talks. He does remember some things but not others. It seems like he can remember something from a few days ago but not something from that day.
I should take pictures and I do have the same convos over and over again..I guess that's why he's remembering things from a few weeks or days ago. he thought he saw my dad a few times but dad is in AZ. I think he still remembers when they were here a few weeks ago. I guess it's good that he has dad on his mind. he knows he's not right. He is accepting his limitations. Things are changing with him. I had a whole convo about my house and a potential apartment with him and then 20 minutes later I brought it up and he remembered.
This must be so frustrating for him. Being in the hospital for so long just blows.
If he has some kind of short term memory that's a great sign. It will take time but it will get better. Not 100% but better.
When DH was in the hospital there were a few times he would ask me "how are your parents" which I thouhgt was strange because my parents are divorced and he only met my dad once. So I said "fine, but Gary what are my parents names" and he said "mr & mrs so&so". I told him "no that is danielle's parents, I'm not Danielle".
Who is Danielle? Is ex from 3 yrs earlier!
He's lucky that didn't last too long
As for the pictures, I took pics of our house our family & friends and hung them in his room with their names on the back of them and test him every day.
I know it's hard but it does get easier. It just takes time. And believe me I know you're tired of hearing that!
ETA: Another thing we did was put an eraseable board up in his room and whoever visited that day would sign it. That way I could talk to him about his visitors and try to jog his memory a little. Sometimes it worked sometimes it didn't. But it was something else we were able to do with it.
Message edited 7/21/2007 9:10:56 AM.
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| Posted 7/21/07 8:56 AM |
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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
I'm sorry Susan. I wish I had some advice, but all I can offer are  and . I hope he starts doing better soon. It's got to be frustrating (for him AND you) to be in the hospital so long and to be making only small progress -- but it does sound like he's made so much progress so far. I'll be he continues to improve.
for you!
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| Posted 7/21/07 9:01 AM |
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SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!
Member since 3/06 32345 total posts
Name:
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
you are such an amazing person!
I cannot imagine how hard this must be to deal with 
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| Posted 7/21/07 9:06 AM |
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Blu-ize
Plan B is Now Plan A
Member since 7/05 32475 total posts
Name:
Susan
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Re: Just when I think things are looking up
Posted by Mssissy
Posted by Blu-ize
Posted by Mssissy
Susan...if you remind him of your conversations or your visits does he than remember them? Do you take pictures of your visits with him?
That's how we had to handle DH for a long time. It was very repetitive, I would have the same conversations over and over again, but eventually it all started to come back.
I know it's hard. But hang in there you're doing a wonderful thing.
I do remind him of our talks. He does remember some things but not others. It seems like he can remember something from a few days ago but not something from that day.
I should take pictures and I do have the same convos over and over again..I guess that's why he's remembering things from a few weeks or days ago. he thought he saw my dad a few times but dad is in AZ. I think he still remembers when they were here a few weeks ago. I guess it's good that he has dad on his mind. he knows he's not right. He is accepting his limitations. Things are changing with him. I had a whole convo about my house and a potential apartment with him and then 20 minutes later I brought it up and he remembered.
This must be so frustrating for him. Being in the hospital for so long just blows.
If he has some kind of short term memory that's a great sign. It will take time but it will get better. Not 100% but better.
When DH was in the hospital there were a few times he would ask me "how are your parents" which I thouhgt was strange because my parents are divorced and he only met my dad once. So I said "fine, but Gary what are my parents names" and he said "mr & mrs so&so". I told him "no that is danielle's parents, I'm not Danielle".
Who is Danielle? Is ex from 3 yrs earlier!
He's lucky that didn't last too long
As for the pictures, I took pics of our house our family & friends and hung them in his room with their names on the back of them and test him every day.
I know it's hard but it does get easier. It just takes time. And believe me I know you're tired of hearing that!
ETA: Another thing we did was put an eraseable board up in his room and whoever visited that day would sign it. That way I could talk to him about his visitors and try to jog his memory a little. Sometimes it worked sometimes it didn't. But it was something else we were able to do with it.
Did that in the beginning with the eraseable, but they move his room so many times that they would take it down and then I would have to sick it back up and it would fall down. The've moved him 4 times already and I know it will happen again.
He has a cell phone now and we call him all the time. He has our number pop up on the last call. So if we cal him, sometimes a few minutes later he will call back and not remember we talked. He's really trying, we just have to find ways to help him remember. I'm going out to buy some memory games so we can play tomorrow while we visit. The Occ therapist showed me what she uses. She says he's a lot better.
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| Posted 7/21/07 9:43 AM |
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