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Let's Discuss Closure...

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MrsDiamondgrlie
Bailey

Member since 5/05

12810 total posts

Name:
D

Let's Discuss Closure...

Do you have something in your life you still feel you need closure with? Do you try to get it no matter what?

I have one situation left in my life I want to but if I do it would involve contacting an ex which I dont think is the right thing to do. Or is it my life and I should do what means something to me?

Anyone like to comment?

Posted 7/13/06 3:26 PM
 
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leighla
Support Cancer Research

Member since 5/05

16353 total posts

Name:
Lauren

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

I have two gaping holes in my life with two friends who suddenly decided they didn't want to be friends with me any more because I was moving to NJ five years ago.

It got really ugly at the end. We had a huge fight and I was moving shortly after and they never even acknowledged me when I tried to reach out at Christmas that year.

Even though they were horrible to me, I still think about it and desperately want closure on what happened - even if it's just a better explanation for why they turned.

Posted 7/13/06 3:28 PM
 

baghag
:P

Member since 5/05

10278 total posts

Name:

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...


There is only one issue I have that isn't complete, but trying to get closure would ultimately end up being more disruptive. Does that make sense?

Posted 7/13/06 3:28 PM
 

nrthshgrl
It goes fast. Pay attention.

Member since 7/05

57538 total posts

Name:

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

I do but I can wait to close it since I'm still stinging from it.

As for the closure part, will you getting closure open up some upheaval in his life? Then I'm not sure that it would be true closure. If it means a lot to you, you're going to do it anyway (at least from the way you've worded it).Chat Icon Chat Icon

Posted 7/13/06 3:28 PM
 

Diana1215
Living on a prayer!!!

Member since 10/05

29450 total posts

Name:
Diana

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

I think there are some things you will never really have closure on - and some things that will always keep you wondering "What if"

I look at it as - this is the life I was meant to live and try really hard not to look back and wonder too much about the things/people in my past.

Alot of my past is what got me where I am right now and for that I am grateful.

Did that answer your question at all? Chat Icon

Posted 7/13/06 3:30 PM
 

MrsProfessor
hi

Member since 5/05

14279 total posts

Name:

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

I have a similar situation, maybe, and I think that accepting that there IS no real closure was my closure, if that makes any sense. Ultimately I am so much better off with DH and without him and letting go of the past is the best and only thing to do. There are many things in life I'll never have answers for.

Posted 7/13/06 3:30 PM
 

Snozberry
I might steal your diamonds

Member since 2/06

4680 total posts

Name:
Melissa

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by baghag


There is only one issue I have that isn't complete, but trying to get closure would ultimately end up being more disruptive. Does that make sense?



Absolutely - I was going to say this.

Posted 7/13/06 3:30 PM
 

dandr10199
Grace is growing up too fast!

Member since 10/05

11561 total posts

Name:
Dina

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by baghag


There is only one issue I have that isn't complete, but trying to get closure would ultimately end up being more disruptive. Does that make sense?



YEP. I have a similar situation in my family. Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon 's to you

Posted 7/13/06 3:31 PM
 

lululu
LIF Adult

Member since 7/05

9511 total posts

Name:

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

I have a friend that stopped returning my calls years ago. Nothing happened but I left her several messages and nothing. She is still friends with one of my closest friends and will ask about me from time to time but i dont think we will ever speak again. I am still unsure what happened but I have resigned myself to the fact that i will never find out.

Posted 7/13/06 3:32 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

Member since 9/05

18504 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

I also have something that I need closure with, and also involves an ex. I just try not to think about it. Writing my thoughts in my diary help.

Posted 7/13/06 3:32 PM
 

pmpkn087
Life is good...

Member since 9/05

18504 total posts

Name:
Stephanie

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by baghag


There is only one issue I have that isn't complete, but trying to get closure would ultimately end up being more disruptive. Does that make sense?



This makes total sense to me, as this is exactly how I feel about my situation also.

Posted 7/13/06 3:33 PM
 

Emily
Kasey & Me! Lurves it!

Member since 7/06

8703 total posts

Name:
STBHC

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by Diana1215

I think there are some things you will never really have closure on - and some things that will always keep you wondering "What if"

I look at it as - this is the life I was meant to live and try really hard not to look back and wonder too much about the things/people in my past.

Alot of my past is what got me where I am right now and for that I am grateful.

Did that answer your question at all? Chat Icon



I agree that whether I got closure or not..my past made me who I am today. I would love closure on some issues that will never have closure...I meditate on it and then I move on. If I spent my whole life wondering about an issue and the others involved had moved on..I would be wasting my time. I would never want to disturb others happiness just to help myself. I have learned a saying that I live by...Today is called the present because it is a gift. The past is a distant memory and tommorrow is not a guarantee, so enjoy the present!

Posted 7/13/06 3:36 PM
 

evenedan
Need a little sunshine

Member since 9/05

3843 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by baghag


There is only one issue I have that isn't complete, but trying to get closure would ultimately end up being more disruptive. Does that make sense?



Makes total sense and I feel the same way.

Posted 7/13/06 3:41 PM
 

jennandrob
mom of two!

Member since 5/05

4368 total posts

Name:
Jenn

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by Diana1215

I think there are some things you will never really have closure on - and some things that will always keep you wondering "What if"

I look at it as - this is the life I was meant to live and try really hard not to look back and wonder too much about the things/people in my past.

Alot of my past is what got me where I am right now and for that I am grateful.



Well said! This is exactly how I feel

Posted 7/13/06 3:44 PM
 

MrsDiamondgrlie
Bailey

Member since 5/05

12810 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

I think the thing that gets me the most upset is that why do I even need closure about something from 9 years ago. It bothers me that I cant let it go... I didnt care about this person much back then, why now? Maybe that is the reason why I want closure... I am a much nicer person now than I was back then.

Posted 7/13/06 3:47 PM
 

bellaro
LIF Adult

Member since 7/06

927 total posts

Name:
Rosalia

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by evenedan

Posted by baghag


There is only one issue I have that isn't complete, but trying to get closure would ultimately end up being more disruptive. Does that make sense?



Makes total sense and I feel the same way.



I agree.....

Posted 7/13/06 3:52 PM
 

SweetestOfPeas
J'taime Paris!

Member since 3/06

32345 total posts

Name:

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

I have a different perspective for this thread…

On one particular relationship I did manage to get closure. Trust me when I tell you that his words still haunt me to this day (6 years later!) Sometimes I wonder if I would have been better off not knowing.

Posted 7/13/06 3:55 PM
 

islandersgirl74
Love Being A Mommy!

Member since 6/06

5804 total posts

Name:
Michelle

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by Diana1215

I think there are some things you will never really have closure on - and some things that will always keep you wondering "What if"

I look at it as - this is the life I was meant to live and try really hard not to look back and wonder too much about the things/people in my past.

Alot of my past is what got me where I am right now and for that I am grateful.

Did that answer your question at all? Chat Icon



You have a good attitude!

Posted 7/13/06 4:28 PM
 

LadyMaravilla
Fall Is Here

Member since 5/05

12023 total posts

Name:
Sonia

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by Diana1215

I think there are some things you will never really have closure on - and some things that will always keep you wondering "What if"

I look at it as - this is the life I was meant to live and try really hard not to look back and wonder too much about the things/people in my past.

Alot of my past is what got me where I am right now and for that I am grateful.

Did that answer your question at all? Chat Icon



I agree.

Posted 7/13/06 4:30 PM
 

Redhead
You Live, You Learn

Member since 5/05

31871 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by MrsDiamondgrlie

Do you have something in your life you still feel you need closure with? Do you try to get it no matter what?

I have one situation left in my life I want to but if I do it would involve contacting an ex which I dont think is the right thing to do. Or is it my life and I should do what means something to me?

Anyone like to comment?


i did....

recently with a friend

but a sad turn of events brought us back together and we had a long chat...

not exactly closure per say but an understanding was reached

Posted 7/13/06 4:36 PM
 

missus-hbradio
Twin mommy

Member since 5/05

15857 total posts

Name:

Re: Let's Discuss Closure...

Posted by baghag


There is only one issue I have that isn't complete, but trying to get closure would ultimately end up being more disruptive. Does that make sense?



Same thing for me. Sometimes its better to just leave things in the past alone even if they are still "open". It could cause a whole snowball effect.Chat Icon

Posted 7/13/06 7:49 PM
 
 
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