Losing my mind from breastfeeding ...

Hi. Hoping someone can help. I am going back to work at a job that I can't pump at in 6 weeks. My beautiful baby girl is only 12 days old. My intention was never to BF full time, just to get it going and then supplement with formula so that at least she gets some of the health benefits and we can have some bonding time. The problem is, it is going so so poorly that I don't know if I can continue. I had complications in the hospital and a bad experience with the LC's there. Since then, I've been trying to figure it out. But my baby girl has no schedule, I can't seem to figure out when she wants to feed, every feeding takes two hours and by the time I'm done with one it's time to start another. To make matters worse, one of my breasts is essentially unusable today bc it is so sore and cracked and possibly infected that I was told to just pump for a while and let it heal. This adds another hour onto the routine, bc I can't pump and BF at the same time. My husband has been totally supportive and helpful, and he is the one who comforts or changes our baby when I am off soaking or applying heat or or pumping but he is going back to work this week. Who will comfort and change her when I am off tending to breasts that don't seem to want to work? My supply appears to be in ... it's not a supply problem. The one that gets really sore is oddly shaped. So I have to focus on the other one, which gets over used, then it gets sore etc. Essentially, my whole life is doing this and I feel like I am missing out on the bonding that was one of the reasons I wanted to do this to begin with. Anyone go through this? Advice?

Re: Losing my mind from breastfeeding ...

Okay, I just finished replying with a novel and hit backspace by accident and lost my whole reply, so I will try again!

It is very difficult for a lot of people. You are not alone. I didnt have any trouble, but I was very lucky.

Try giving her only formula, every 3 hours will probably be the schedule. Thats the average. Right when she's done, pump. Once you really get the hang of it, it might only take 20 minutes to pump 8-10oz. Build up a nice supply, and get on a schedule of feeding and pumping right after. It really worked well for me this way. Genevieve had no problem latching, but I wanted her to get used to a bottle right away since I had to go back to work.

Also, when she goes to sleep at night, pump. Pump again before you go to bed. Pump every cance you get to build up an extra supply in the fridge or freezer. Then you wont need the formula anymore. My husband used to feed the baby, and I would pump at the same time

Try Lanolin Oil, I think its called, for the cracking.And I think Gerber makes something called Breast Therapy, which you dont have to smear on with your finger. It comes in a stick, so its not as messy!

I'm sorry you had a bad experience with the LC's at the hospital, but you should try to find another one. I didnt need one, but many of my friends used them and would have quit BF without their help!

Good luck!

Re: Losing my mind from breastfeeding ...

Since you don't have a supply problem, why don't you just pump and then bottle feed. Then when you go back to work you can formula feed and pump feed when you can.

Re: Losing my mind from breastfeeding ...

I'm so sorry you're having such a tough time. I know how painful BF can be. It sounds like you need a good, supportive LC immediately for some advice. The ladies on here can recommend some helpful ones in your area.

I applaud you for sticking with BF despite your challenges. Good luck.

Re: Losing my mind from breastfeeding ...

I had a very hard time with latch and because of that I wasn't able to breastfeed. I was very determined to pump like crazy but when it came down to it I wasn't able to pump enough to feed my daughter, and ended up supplementing with formula and switching over completly after a month and a half.

However I did have that beginning experience...so I do have to say that the Lanolin or Lansinoh cream does work very well to sooth cracked and sore nipples. It won't harm the baby at all so you can put it on often and don't have to wash it off when the baby nurses.

I'd also recommend pumping as often as possible to build up a milk supply for when you go back to work, so that if you do have to use formula at least she'll still be having your milk also and those health benefits can continue. I always felt better SOME then none at all, and if you are able to continue it on then that's great.

I wish you all the luck and would also recommend finding another LC because I wish I had done it -- to get more help!

Re: Losing my mind from breastfeeding ...

Yes, I went through lots of pain in the beginning. There are no great words of wisdom other than make sure you see a lactation consultant to find out how to heal the fastest, and try to stick to it. The suffering you are feeling is temporary, while the health benefits for your baby are much longer lasting.

Personally, I don't think its just breastfeeding thats making you feel trouble bonding. Newborns aren't that much fun. They are just needy, demanding little alien creatures regardless of how you feed them. Moms picture a sweet little baby cooing in your arms like in the movies. That doesn't happen for months!!

You aren't alone:
1) No newborns have any schedule.
2) None of us knew our babies cues right away.
3) All healthy babies nurse constantly the beginning.
4) Many of us didn't feel bonded right away, although few will admit it.

Decide what you want. If you want to make breastfeeding work, hang in there and get help. If you want to stop, then go ahead, your baby will be fine.

Re: Losing my mind from breastfeeding ...

I am having an impossible number of problems with BFing so I definitely feel your pain (literally). I can recommend an amazing LC if you want to fix the problems and continue BF. Lansinoh can be used after every feeding to help heal. However, be careful. According to the Dr. I saw you should only need a product like that for the first couple of weeks. After that if there's still pain the problem is not your nipples, it's something else. I continued using lansinoh and it ended up causing me problems b/c it creates an environment that produces yeast and leads to infection. Also, if you have been sore, cracked since day one that can expose you to infection as well. FM me if you want a referral or you have additional questions, I'd be happy to help in any way I can. You're not alone. As the other poster said it is not the beautiful peaceful nurturing experience that they paint it out to be for all mothers.

Re: Losing my mind from breastfeeding ...

Re: Losing my mind from breastfeeding ...