Me...VERY LONG.. - UPDATED JUNE 12th in OP!

okay - so i just found out there's a computer for public use here (i've only JUST been allowed to walk around on the floor - before today - it was SIT DOWN and try not to hyperventilate).

thank you to Tara and Jill and everyone on this site. You have no idea how amazing it has felt to log in on my cell and read the comments on my update thread. Between that and Emma's beautiful face - it's the ONLY things keeping me going (and all the text messages from you girls too).

Today's update is that my second chest x-ray looks better than my first from 3 days ago. The left lung is MUCH improved and my right is slowly improving (but was much less severe than my left so they are HAPPY with this news). They have no idea how or why this happened. I was diagnosed with adult onset asthma 10 years ago and since i've been with dave (7 years this august) - i've used an inhaler ONE TIME...so i've never had an issue before.

They did many tests on me - chest x-ray, chest cat scan with dye and a bronchoscopy (i do NOT recommend - it was NOT fun). They found blood flakes in my lungs (nothing severe, but still a puzzle as to how it got there) and are calling what i have PNEMONIAL but not pnemoia....and they are not sure what or why. They have put me on 125 mg of steroids and i'm doing a breathing treatment every 4 hours.

Overall - i haven't slept much (tonight they are giving me a sleeping pill) because i haven't been allowed to do more than wash a nipple on a bottle of formula (not breastfeeding currently because of the meds that are in me - pump and dump works for me right now - not that my milk is in).....

They HOPE to send me home tomorrow - but for the first time in my life i feel that hope is not a good thing - because when that hope is dashed - it means about a 4 hour solid cry fest (which is what i've been having EVERY DAY when they tell me -you're not going home today jess).

I have met every single nurse on the staff and Emma has been asked to babysit the others in the nursery - so that's a nice side job for her. The staff here i have to say is the SINGLE most amazing staff i have ever met in my life. EVERY one of them is pulling for us - and after I have a nurse one day - they all call in and ask how i'm doing if they are off (the switchboard person knows me by name). I guess that's another good thing - the quality of care...

So that's my story for the moment. I have been DIEING to get on here and share pics and stories with you of Emma's adorableness...

I'm NOT SURE if this will work - but here are the pics that they took here at the hospital: http://www.our365.com/NewbornPortraits/BabyDetail.aspx?birthid=67076597-955a-4919-94bc-5fb1257fe434&babyid=552e27e3-bfdd-41de-94b4-e51b3be4057f

If it doesn't -
go to: our365.com
go to web nursery
click on search by hospital
the hospital city is: new brunswick, NJ
the hospital is: St. Peter's University Hospital
search by JUNE BABIES
June 3rd - JESSICA H is Emma's link to her photos....

If you got this far - know i love you and can't wait to be back home and back online full time with Emma by my side :)


---------------------------------------

UPDATE: JUNE 12th -

Well - today is the first day they gave me news and I didn't cry.......we are going home tomorrow for 100% sure. The high power steroids they have me on would require about 15-20 pills for me to take NOT via injection into my IV - and my last dosage is scheduled for 12:30 this evening (am)....so they want me to go tomorrow. Dave will GO TO WORK tomorrow and he'll pick me up tomorrow evening after he's out.

I'm NOT crying and i'm not upset - it's life. I'd much rather be here GOD FORBID there are any problems - because once we go home - if i relapse or have ANY issues - i come back here and Emma and Dave stay at home - which would give me a whole other level of worry (not for ANY reason - Dave has been OVERWHELMINGLY AMAZING - WOW)....but just worry ya know?

So that's all the news that's fit to print... just finished about 4 laps around the floor and my Oxygen level was at 97% - so they are happy with that. When sitting around - it's at 100 - so i'm not losing MUCH by walking....

Emma is still a joy and gem - her laugh and smiles make us beyond happy!!! She's the cutest little girl EVER (though we may be bias)...

Message edited 6/12/2009 3:19:27 PM.

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Jess, I am soooo sorry you are having sucha rough time. i am thinking and praying you get healthy real real soon. Emmma is beyond gorgeous!!!!!!! Praying for you and baby to go home asap

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Feel better soon! Hang in there!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Jess I am so sorry you are having a rough time, hopefully you get the go home approval real soon!!! I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers! Your little Emma is just gorgeous!!!!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

So good to hear from you!!!

It's a good sign your health is improving!!

When you do get to go home and be with your sweet, beautiful Emma, it will be such a blessing for you!



Congratulations on your little one by the way!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Jess - First Congratulations on the birth of Emma!

I am sorry that you are going through all of this but it sounds like you are on the way to be fully recovered.

Keep focusing on Emma and soon this awful experience will be a distant memory.

ETA: Jess she is beautiful and that bow is the cutest thing ever

Message edited 6/11/2009 4:29:54 PM.

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Great to hear your update and hopefully you will be out of there soon - at least you are getting great care while you are there. Emma is ADORABLE- cannot believe you got a clip in her hair already -she is going to be a girly girl all the way. Lots of congrats and well wishes to you

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

OMG! The link worked for me...Daddy's Little Steeler's Fan and the pink bow - OMG! You made me all teary when I read that Emma is "babysitting" the others..how freaking cute.

Jess, I am SO SO sorry you are going through this..I truly am. There is light at the end of the tunnel..you will be home soon with your amazing little angel!!!

When I called the switchboard the other day to get your room # the lady seemed to know you

Hang in there...

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Jess, I feel awful for you that you have to go through this. I hope you get to go home and enjoy your baby girl soon. She is absolutely BEAUTIFUL!!!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Oh Jess... it's so good to hear from you! Emma is absolutely beautiful and so lucky to have such a strong Mommy!
I'm so sorry this is happening... I can only imagine how tough it's been. Just try and keep in mind that this too will pass and before you know it you'll be home with your beautiful baby girl!
And I'm glad to hear they're taking such good care of you. I'm sure that at least makes it a little bit easier. We're all here for you, thinking of you, praying for you.

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

I hope you feel better soon, glad to hear that things are starting to look up though. Emma is absolitely adorable!!

Hugs for you

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Your little is beyond adorable!

Sorry that you have been through so much- hope that you get to go home soon with your little bundle of joy!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Oh Jess I hope you're feeling better and get to go home soon!!! Emma is so precious!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Jess, First congratulations! Emma is beautiful. I am so sorry that you are going through all of this and I hope you have a speedy recovery. Feel better soon!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Jess, no worries - I was glad to update about your current situation Michelle did the honors with your birthing process.

You already know I'm that you get home tomorrow- it sounds good to me though!!! I have a great feeling you will finally be heading home with your ADORABLE Emma.

OMG those pics!!! She looks PRECIOUS...and in the Steeler blanket- LOVE IT!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

OMG Jess, she is so adorable! Congrats to you and Dave!!!! Get well soon!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

just wanted to add - i didn't do the bow - they put that on her.. :)

the blanket - yeah - that's ours...they asked if we had anything special and we gave them that...

our Summer pics were SUPPOSED to be tomorrow - and i think that we aren't even home yet for THAT is also killing me...

Emma's 8 days old now....and we're not home.

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

OMG!!! This is the update I have been waiting for!!!

First of all: congratulations on the birth of your GORGEOUS daughter!!!
I just looked at the pictures and she is ADORABLE!!!!
What a beautiful face and I LOVE that bow!!!!

I am so sorry for the horrible time you are having!!! I am glad things are improving but I know it has been a tough time for you and your husband!

Stay strong and I cannot wait to see you back online!!!!

I will be praying fro you!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Feel better!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

I'm so sorry you are still in the hospital but am glad you have good news.
Emma is adorable!!!! She's so cute!!!!
Congratulations again and I hope you are home soon!!!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

hang in there, Jess! you're getting better already, so try to look on the bright side when you can! Emma is absolutely beautiful! i love her little blanket!! you've been through so much, just think how wonderful it will be when you're all home together.

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

SOOO glad to hear from you!

I hope you get better and recover real soon! What an ordeal Jess! Stay strong!!!!


Emma is beautiful, I love her robe and pink bow! I wish you and your family the best and hope you're home soon!!!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

OMGOSH!!! what CHEEKS! she is beautiful. God bless her.

and take ALL the time you need. I am sure it sucks not to go home, but you need to be 100% so you can go home and give all to your new bundle of joy.

rest up and take care! Congrats!!!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Feel better - I hope you get to go home soon!

Emma is so precious - I love her little bow!

Congratulations!

Re: Me...VERY LONG..

Feel better soon Jess!! Emma is beautiful!!!