Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

Time is ticking down and I'm really wondering how the whole delivery/hospital stay is going to go (though I know it will all work out, just interested).

I'm hoping to have another easy vaginal delivery, and I'll have a private hospital room.

So-- how often did your older child/children visit you? How old were they? DD will be a few days from turning 3 years. I know she's going to miss me and want to visit me (well, really I am going to miss her TERRIBLY and want her there all the time), though I know I'll want to send her home so she can have regular, fun, play time with daddy/grandmothers who will be watching her.

Just curious how long were your older kids there each day? And obviously, I'm assuming they didn't visit you while you were in labor (before pushing, obviously), right? I always assumed DD would come to the hospital AFTER baby is born, but someone asked me if she'd be visiting me while I was in labor if it's during the day....and while I didn't think so, I didn't know what others have done.

ETA: I'm obviously going to have her be at home for naptime, bedtime, etc...

Thanks

Message edited 6/7/2010 11:07:59 AM.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

When I had DD last December, DS was not allowed to visit at the hospital. It was because of the H1N1 going around and nobody under 17 was allowed to visit at the hospital.

To be honest with you, it was not as bad as I thought it was going to be. DS was with my parents and DH went home to see him. And I got to really bond with DD like I did with DS when he was born.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

This was our deal.

Csection scheduled for 11am. I wanted to make sure that Jack's schedule was not changed at all so I had my parents bring him up to the hospital every day after his nap.

I had a huge bag of toys for Jack. He got gifts from people who came to visit also. He made out like a bandit.

I was in for 3 days and came home on the 4th. He came up every day after his nap.

HTH!

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

I had a scheduled c-section so I dropped DD#1 off at my mom's in the morning before we headed to the hospital. My c-section was scheduled for 10am so they come up around 9:45am. I was in recovery for a long time because I had a problem with my IV so after they saw DD#2 my mom and ILs took DD#1 home.

She then came to visit every afternoon during sibling hours from 2-4pm and then at night during general visiting hours from 7-8pm. When she wasn't at the hospital she was at my mom's with my mom and ILs (they stayed at my mom's house for the 3 days I was in the hospital). After visiting hours at night my DH would go pick her up and bring her home to sleep in her own bed and then drop her off in the am when he was heading to the hospital.

She was 2yo.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

I have a c/s on Tuesday. My parents brought Chelsea up on Thursday to see me. The baby was still in the NICU so she did not see him until Friday when they brought her to visit me again. I came home on Saturday.

I missed her terribly but SHE was perfectly fine. She breezed into the hospital room with a Hi Mommy! and acted like I saw her just a few hours ago. She is 2.5 years old.

ETA: She didn't come visit on Tuesday or Wednesday because I didn't get to my room until later in the evening. I also had a ton of IV's hooked up to me because I had some issues with my blood pressure and somehow became anemic. I didn't want her to see me until I was not attached to any machines and in regular clothes because I was afraid it would scare her.

Message edited 6/7/2010 11:46:15 AM.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

My DD was not able to visit me due to the H1N1 ban, which was lifted the day I was discharged.

But I think it worked out for the best. I missed her and it sucked, but she got a ton of attention from her aunts, uncles and grandparents. She got a lot of gifts and I think that distracted her from what was going on.

Good luck

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

Posted by Diana1215

This was our deal.

Csection scheduled for 11am. I wanted to make sure that Jack's schedule was not changed at all so I had my parents bring him up to the hospital every day after his nap.

I had a huge bag of toys for Jack. He got gifts from people who came to visit also. He made out like a bandit.

I was in for 3 days and came home on the 4th. He came up every day after his nap.

HTH!

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

Posted by nbc188

Posted by Diana1215

This was our deal.

Csection scheduled for 11am. I wanted to make sure that Jack's schedule was not changed at all so I had my parents bring him up to the hospital every day after his nap.

I had a huge bag of toys for Jack. He got gifts from people who came to visit also. He made out like a bandit.

I was in for 3 days and came home on the 4th. He came up every day after his nap.

HTH!

You brought gifts for him TO the hospital and kept them there with you, then when he'd visit you'd give him something?? I like that idea....

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

Posted by Diana1215

Posted by nbc188

Posted by Diana1215

This was our deal.

Csection scheduled for 11am. I wanted to make sure that Jack's schedule was not changed at all so I had my parents bring him up to the hospital every day after his nap.

I had a huge bag of toys for Jack. He got gifts from people who came to visit also. He made out like a bandit.

I was in for 3 days and came home on the 4th. He came up every day after his nap.

HTH!

You brought gifts for him TO the hospital and kept them there with you, then when he'd visit you'd give him something?? I like that idea....

I had a HUGE giftbag of toys. You name it, it was in there. Everytime he came he got to open up some new toys.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

Posted by nbc188

Posted by Diana1215

Posted by nbc188

Posted by Diana1215

This was our deal.

Csection scheduled for 11am. I wanted to make sure that Jack's schedule was not changed at all so I had my parents bring him up to the hospital every day after his nap.

I had a huge bag of toys for Jack. He got gifts from people who came to visit also. He made out like a bandit.

I was in for 3 days and came home on the 4th. He came up every day after his nap.

HTH!

You brought gifts for him TO the hospital and kept them there with you, then when he'd visit you'd give him something?? I like that idea....

I had a HUGE giftbag of toys. You name it, it was in there. Everytime he came he got to open up some new toys.

I would have never thought of this...I will be printing this to show to DH so I can say "Diana did it, so I am allowed to buy C things " Seriously, I'm using you as an example!!

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

I know DS isn't 2 yet but he was 18 months when DD was born. I went into labor in the early morning, so my mom came and stayed with DS. I didn't have her until later in the day, almost 6pm, so it was good that he wasn't there all day - how boring for him! I saw him that night for 2 minutes before he went home to bed. He came the next day to meet his little sister, was there for a little while, and then spent the rest of the day with family. I was home on the 3rd day and he was out with my ILs that day, he came home after dinner and that was it. I think it worked out well, he got to sleep in his own bed and DH didn't have to worry about being home for him, and I didn't have to worry about entertaining him in the hospital all day!

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

I live an hour from my hospital, so that was also a factor for me.

During labor I did NOT want Mads there. I don't care how pain-free I was with the epi, it was too uncomfortable to be dealing with a toddler wanting to crawl all over me.

I gave birth at about 3pm. I spoke to Madelyn on the phone to tell her I love her. DH went home soon after the birth to take care of bedtime. Her routine was my priority, so he slept at home.

The next day, he brought her up after breakfast and they stayed for about 1.5 hours. Honestly, as great as it was seeing her, I was so ready for her to go home by the end of that hour and a half. It's hard keeping a toddler occupied in a hospital room, especially when you have a NB that wants attention too.

My parents brought Mads to McDonalds, then home for an afternoon nap. Tony went home later to deal with bedtime.

The time in the hospital goes by so quickly. Rather than worry about my older DD (who was getting showered with attention by her grandparents) I tried to focus on the fact that I was able to give my younger DD 100% of my attention. I look back at that first night in the hospital when it was just she and I cuddled up in bed BFing and I smile. It was really nice to have that alone time to bond with Eliza.

It will go by just fine- I stressed the same as you did and was surprised at how it all just "happend".

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

Colin was 14 months when I had ds. He came to visit on day 2 for an hour
I had a vaginal delivery but was induced so I didn't see him during that time.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

DD was exactly 2.5 years old. My mom brought her the day I delivered once I was in my room and stayed a few hours. The other 2 days she came with DH and stayed most of the day. He came after her nap, around 2pm and stayed until 8pm. I had a private room so it was nice. We had a coloring book and some toys for her as well as a DVD player. She was great!

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

ITA with Amy. Jack stayed for maybe two hours and at that point we were all ready for him to go home. There is only so much to do in a hospital room for a toddler.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

the day of my c-section, my in laws came over and waited at the house with miki

once KJ was born and I was back in my room, they brought her to see us and she stayed for about an hour or so

IL's then took her to McD's and back home to sleep (DH slept with my at the hospital the first night

she came to visit me every day for a bit and DH slept at home with her

it worked out great

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

when I had DS in December there were no children under 18 allowed in the hospital.. and honestly- i thought it was great... I really didn't want DD to see me b/c I had a c/s and didn't want her crawling on me.. I didn't want her annoying the other patients AND I hate for her to be in a hospital which is full of germs..

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

With Erik, I went into the hospital at the wee hours of the morning. He was born ~10am, so Ella came to visit after the fact (I would not have wanted her there while I was in labor). She stayed maybe an hour or two, and went home with my parents.

She didn't spend too much time at the hospital. She visited everyday but it wasn't a "fun" place for her, and it was hard to juggle her wanting to crawl on me while holding a new baby.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

DS was born during the height of H1N1 hysteria and DD was not allowed to visit at all-missed her so much for those 3 days.

I would probably just have her visit afterwards, especially because you could go into full blown labor/pushing pretty quickly.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

When DD was born, DS had just turned two the week before. I went to the hospital at 1pm on Tuesday, had DD at 6pm and was home by 7pm the next day. Very easy vaginal delivery.

Anyway, I didn't have DS come to the hospital at all since I was just there one night. Plus he was so young and into everything so it was in his best interest to stay home. My DH even went home to sleep the night the baby was born since I was fine, baby was great and my two year old needed his routine.

In all honesty, it was kinda like a nice little vacation for me for a night.

I'm due in 4 weeks with #3 and my kids are 3 1/2 and 5 1/2 and will be going to my moms and she will bring them up for a little while to see the baby depending on the timing of everything. But if its anything like the last two times, I'm home within 24 hours, so nobody really starts missing me.

Re: Moms of 2+ re: older child and visiting you in the hospital

DS was born 2 weeks ago today. I went in on Monday morning and was only there for 2 days. My older son came on Tuesday. He is 3. I had put together a bag of toys from Target to entertain him and told him when he arrived at the hospital that they were from the new baby. He was thrilled. He probably stayed with me for about 3 1/2 hours and then I came home the next day.