Need advice...long.

I have a 10 year old ds in 5th grade. In 3rd grade, he was dignosed as ADHD, inattentive. He's not hyperactive at all, more of a rocker and a fidgeter, and his focus is nonexistant. We tried a few different medications over the course of two years and did not like the side affects. It made him really sad, withdrawn, and not wanting to do his normal activities. So we've been medication free for the past year.

Now being in 5th grade, he is struggling a lot in school, particularly in math. He's not really passed a test the whole year. He gets pulled out for extra math help (AIS) and just recently started with a tutor. But he gets really really down on himself still. He often says he's terrible, he's stupid, etc. It breaks my heart.

This morning was supposed to be his first day back after having the flu and being out 3 days from school. When he was getting dressed I went to check on him and he was crying. He said he feels like something is wrong with him that he can't learn right. that he just can't get it no matter what and that his life is terrible. He's been sad and has lots of mood swings lately.

The school did an evaluation earlier in the year and said he was average and no learning disabilities were detected. But they rushed the testing and I think that maybe they are wrong.

Where do I go from here? what kind of doctor woud evaluate for learning disabilities if I wanted a second opinion? And should I have him checked for possible depression?

It breaks my heart to see him suffering.

Sorry this is long, thanks for reading.

Need advice...long.

Oh dear. So sorry. My own DS says things like this from time to time. He is not diagnosed as ADHD, but he has lots of attention issues. I know he is very smart, but that he has trouble in school when the topic doesn't interest him or there is something else to look at...
I guess I don't have any real advice, but I think this is quite typical for kids with ADHD or other attention issues. (just from my own reading).
My pediatrician has said that she would help us find a doc when we are ready, so maybe that would be a good place to start?
Aside from the LD issues and possible help on that front, if he is diagnosed with ADHD, he should be entitled to a 504 plan/ IEP, which could include things like preferential seating, more time on tests, etc. Have you discussed those with the school?
Hope this helps a little... Hugs!!

Need advice...long.

Thank you. He has a 504 plan through school, which gives him special seating, extra books for home, stuff like that. But its not really addressing the issues, and I feel his teacher sees him more as a burden in the classroom than anything (which is sad). He needs more.

I know that depression can sometimes go hand in hand with ADHD. I am just worried that he is going to get swallowed up by middle school next year if I don't address these issues now. I just don't know where to go for a learning disability evaluation. I guess I will call my pediatrician.

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I would address the mood swings separately from the math issues, perhaps going to a psychologist or getting involved in team sports, outings with friends to help him find self worth other than with math, would help him gain confidence in himself.

As for the math, if he is not getting 5th grade math, did he understand 1st - 4th grade math? I would review the earlier concepts so that he masters them and is able to build upon them. If he is missing something from before that was built upon now, it would make learning the topic much harder.

Need advice...long.

He was getting it, until about mid way through 4th grade. He has a low working memory, so he could not grasp the mutiplication facts at first but we worked on it. He did not grasp long division at all. The multiple steps get him and he loses focus in the middle. He often adds when he should subtract and vice versa. Now with the common core curriculum, everything he's learned in grades 1-3 is out the window and they want the problems solved in a completely different way and hes totally confused by it.

I think the math issue is leading to the mood issue somewhat. He's really hating school because of it and every day is a struggle to get him there. I hate seeing that because he has a long way to go and its going to get much harder.

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Maybe you should push for a pull out for resource room. He will get the extra help there.

My son is medicated. Works very well for us. The positive benefits far outweigh any of the negatives (which have adjusted over the years). Without medicine he just cannot focus at all to attempt do his work. He is very inattentive without it.

Need advice...long.

Can I ask what medication your son is on? The medications we tried (Concerta and Adderall) seem to push him further into a depressed state. We have an appt the first week in April with a new doctor to revisit the medication issue.

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Check your FM, you will need to request an independent educational evaluation done by a neuropsychologist and possibly an audiologist at the expense of the district. You can "disagree' with their assessments and put in writing what you are requesting.

Message edited 3/27/2014 12:43:45 PM.

Need advice...long.

Thank you. Sapphire, i fm'd you back. I think that may be my next step. As far as teaching him the math all over again, I'm not sure. Dh and I both work full time and barely have enough time to get the homework for the night done. I could do it over the summer possibly. He is also not that cooperative as he is easily frustrated.

Need advice...long.

What sapphire said. He may need more/different types of services. Does he go to resource room for math? Does he have an aide to keep him on task. Does your school have inclusion classes? Maybe being in a co-teaching class will help him with his subjects. The first step though is what sapphire said.

In the meantime, is he good any anything else, like art, music or a sport? If yes, I would start pushing that and get him in a activity to boost his self esteem. He needs to know that just because he can't do math he is not stupid. Everyone had talents, some are academics and some are not. You need to find what he's good at and keep helping him with that.

Need advice...long.

I am definitely going to request the outside evaluation. He is not in resource room, it was never mentioned to me and I assumed he needed an IEP to get in.

His real love is computers. And classes are not easy to find in that area. He's not much of a sports kid.

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I'm not sure where you live but the Microsoft store in Walt Whitman has classes and activities and check out your local library. If he is into gaming on the computers, check out the local game stores, a lot of them have gaming clubs he might be able to join.

You can definitely have resource room without an IEP, they can just write it into the 504 plan. Actually most kids that are in resource room only have a 504.