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Juliet
Family is Complete!
Member since 5/05 5913 total posts
Name:
Juliet
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Need some hugs today-MIL related
God Bless my mother, she took my MIL back to her house to sleep.
The past four days with MIL on our couch have been impossible. She yells at our cats because she doesn't like them. She complains about the fact that she can't smoke on our porch because the smoke comes right back in. She complained about the disorganized state of our home right now (we are working on the nursery and the things that were in the room before, are now in the living room so we can take them to to the trash)
I worked Wednesday, Friday and today. I am exhausted and feeling run down and MIL had the nerve to tell me that the way my house looks is because of ME because I didn't push DH hard enough to get rid of the things he wasn't using. She also told me that she thinks DH and I don't understand each other very well and we are headed in the same direction as BIL and his wife (BIL is considering moving out). She told me that it is MY responsibility to keep DH calm when he is stressed and not to bother him with my pregnancy complaints because he is stressed enough. She told me she doesn't understand me and finds me unapproachable even though she claims she tries so hard.
I told DH all that his mother said and he told me to take it all with a grain of salt and not worry.
I just feel so rotten that this woman thinks there is something really wrong with DH and me because we are both stressed about a new baby coming into our lives. And I can't believe she thinks it is MY fault.
I LOVE my mother for all that she is doing. She is amazing!!!
I can't wait for MIL to go home
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Posted 11/26/06 8:35 PM  |
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leighla
Support Cancer Research
Member since 5/05 16353 total posts
Name:
Lauren
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
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| Posted 11/26/06 8:37 PM |
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lvdolphins
My Loves!
Member since 5/05 46292 total posts
Name:
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
How long is she for?
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| Posted 11/26/06 8:48 PM |
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landj
After 4 years, 1000 posts!
Member since 7/06 1124 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
I am so sorry - all I can offer are . It sounds like you are doing all that you can to accomodate her. What she said to you was uncalled for. I'm thinking your MIL is coming from a very different school of thought. It could be cultural or it could just be that "old school" way of thinking, that the wife should never complain, not "bother" the husband, etc. That would drive me crazy too. I guess all that you can really do is bite your tongue for now. I wish I had a better solution for you but I'm not sure if you sat down and had a heart to heart with MIL that she would understand. It sounds like she has a completely different perspective on all things marriage and baby and refuses to budge. Regardless, it's unfair for your MIL to blame everything on you and make you out to be the scapegoat. I hope you are able to work things out and again to you!
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| Posted 11/26/06 8:50 PM |
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JenBenMen
party of five
Member since 9/06 11343 total posts
Name:
Jen
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
OMG!! I cant believe that. This is a very stressful time and anyone who doesnt realize that should go to HELL!!
I feel so bad for you. Stand your ground and I glad your mom is there to help.
Just worry about yourself, your DH and the baby.
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| Posted 11/26/06 8:51 PM |
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bayla
Love my two kiddos :)
Member since 8/06 7178 total posts
Name:
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
hang in there!!
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| Posted 11/26/06 8:52 PM |
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
Juliet, how much longer is this b-tch staying (pardon my french) -- I thought she was being all lovey dovey buying you that stroller?! Unless that was part of her bizarre guilt-trip plan to butter you up....... not sure what you can do here except smile and nod and just continue living your life. The Wicked Witch will be gone soon enough.
Message edited 11/26/2006 9:00:59 PM.
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| Posted 11/26/06 9:00 PM |
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Juliet
Family is Complete!
Member since 5/05 5913 total posts
Name:
Juliet
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
Posted by positivetests
Juliet, how much longer is this b-tch staying (pardon my french) -- I thought she was being all lovey dovey buying you that stroller?! Unless that was part of her bizarre guilt-trip plan to butter you up....... not sure what you can do here except smile and nod and just continue living your life. The Wicked Witch will be gone soon enough.
She will be here until December 5th. I think the stroller was an attempt to show off at the shower. And she was perfectly content at my parents' house in a room with a door on a real bed, but I think DH felt guilty that she bought the stroller and felt that she should stay with us.
DH actually told me that the reason why she was coming to sleep at our place was because I had not seen enough of her because of my schedule. Sick twisted DH thought I should eat breakfast with MIL and see her when I come home at night.
The woman is lucky I am more emotional and not as angry as I could have been.
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| Posted 11/26/06 9:05 PM |
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Juliet
Family is Complete!
Member since 5/05 5913 total posts
Name:
Juliet
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
Oh yeah, I think my cracking point was today. I came in from work and DH had gone to play poker. MIL was sitting on the couch reading a book. Before DH left he and my cousin moved the glider chair and dresser (the first two pieces of baby furniture to arrive) up to the newly painted and laminate floored nursery. Unfortunately, they didn't take the cardboard box from the dresser with them. The box and all of the packing stuff was strewn about the living room.
I looked at it when I walked in and MIL started telling me how annoyed she was with DH for leaving it all there. How it made her so stressed. How she couldn't take it anymore. She was SO overwhelmed. She started to CRY because SHE couldn't deal with the mess in MY house. When I told her she had nothing to worry about because I am the one who has to live here, she told me "no, you don't understand. I can't take it anymore. I just can't handle this. I want to cry. I can't take this stress"
Excuse me, I just worked most of the weekend and I am almost 30 weeks pg and I JUST came in the door from work and she had the nerve to cry to ME????
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| Posted 11/26/06 9:12 PM |
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karacg
Babygirl is 4!
Member since 5/05 17076 total posts
Name:
Kara®
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
Then she should friggin CLEAN IT UP HERSELF!!
Juliet I don't really know you but your MIL posts are just awful. I am so sorry you are going through all this stress and aggrevation. I give you a TON of credit for putting up with her as long as you have.
Suggest she work off some of that stress by HELPING YOU and DH straighten up - isn't that why she is there? To help you out, and get ready for this amazing new baby??
I hope Dec. 5 gets here quicky! Maybe she could go back with your mom until then???
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| Posted 11/26/06 10:23 PM |
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CkGm
They get so big, so fast :(
Member since 5/05 13848 total posts
Name:
Christine
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Re: Need some hugs today-MIL related
I have one of those too. I can only wonder what it is like having her on your couch!
Hang in there
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| Posted 11/26/06 10:24 PM |
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