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Ok.. so should i wait?

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Jesaroo
is not the girl you knew

Member since 5/05

14266 total posts

Name:
Jes

Ok.. so should i wait?

lately sometimes ive been wondering if i should let myself get PG. (not TRY, but if it happens)....

BUT.. im only 21 and we still live in an apartment.

not to mention tight on money.

but i think theres got to be ways to deal with it.

i dont know. what do you guys think?

i think that i should REALLY wait.. wait like 4 years..... but teh selfish part of me wants to get preggers now!

Posted 5/12/05 12:24 AM
 
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MrsProfessor
hi

Member since 5/05

14279 total posts

Name:

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

I wish I'd met my DH when I was younger and we didn't have to "rush" to TTC. If I were you, I would enjoy the time you have with your DH, and the freedom you have. You have so much time to have a baby.

I don't think you have to have tons of money in the bank or be in the perfect living situation either. But you would probably enjoy the whole experience of being pg and having the baby more if you didn't have to stress SO much about money and you had a living arrangement that you could find comfort in.

Just my .02. Chat Icon

Posted 5/12/05 8:02 AM
 

Disneygirl
Disney cruise bound!

Member since 5/05

8126 total posts

Name:
D

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

I know how you feel! Chat Icon

Depends, have you talked to your DH about this? You should both be in agreement.

Posted 5/12/05 8:04 AM
 

Redhead
You Live, You Learn

Member since 5/05

31871 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

ahhh this is hard to answer BUT i am going to be honest here....

if i were you i would WAIT. you are sooo young..enjoy a few years with your DH as husband and wife before having kids.
JMHO

Posted 5/12/05 8:18 AM
 

VirginiaDeb
Don't eat me, hippo!

Member since 5/05

9252 total posts

Name:
Deb

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

I'm kind of in the same situation. Part of me really wants to try to have kids within 6 mo to a year of getting married, I'm young also (will be almost 23 when we get married) and know we have time, but at the same time don't want to wait.

I think we will though. I just got my masters and want to work for a few years before having kids. Though as of late, waiting 5 years has shrunk to waiting 3 1/2 - 4. Chat Icon

As for the money situation... as my FMIL says if anyone waited until they were finacially ready to have kids, there wouldn't be any Chat Icon

Good luck with your decision!

Posted 5/12/05 8:31 AM
 

LnR6604
I'm Gonna be a Big Brother

Member since 5/05

1647 total posts

Name:
Licia

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

I totally understand how you feel, but IMO I also agree to wait. You are young and still have plenty of time. Enjoy you marriage. Learn eachother and grow with eachother before you bring children into this world. My DH & I are TTC, but if it were up to him we would have had a baby already. I felt we needed time to adjust. Actually if it weren't for our ages, I would still wait a little longer.

Posted 5/12/05 8:33 AM
 

jms100303
Luv my munchkins

Member since 5/05

4789 total posts

Name:
Jennifer

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

It definately is a personal opinion, but I think you should wait. You are still a newlywed and have so much time. I think you should enjoy being young and being married. You have plenty of time to have children. Plus once you have them, there is no turning back. Take time for yourselves, travel, etc.

Posted 5/12/05 9:16 AM
 

MrsJ
I love my Katie Bug

Member since 5/05

11357 total posts

Name:
Kathy

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

I would wait a little while if I were you. Some of the best times I had going out and still partying was when I was 21-23-ish. Looking back I know I was WAY to young to have kids...money was tight, etc. You're only 21 and you just got married...enjoy some time alone with your DH. 6 months or a year or two down the road you can always start TTC if you want.

Posted 5/12/05 9:27 AM
 

Sassyz75
Turning a new page

Member since 5/05

9731 total posts

Name:
Dina

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

I agree.
you should wait.
DH and I have been married for 2 years now and I wouldn't give that time back for anything. Even though I am MUCH older than you, I think it's important to have some time with eachother.... because once a baby comes the alone time is few & far between.

Posted 5/12/05 9:31 AM
 

casey31
Mommy of 3!

Member since 5/05

2967 total posts

Name:
Mommy to two boys and a girl

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

You have so much time! Talk to your DH and see what his thoughts are- maybe it will make you feel better if you both agree to a timeline- like 3 to 4 years. Then, you will have that to look forward to and still be able to enjoy your alone time with DH- and maybe travel too!Chat Icon

Posted 5/12/05 9:31 AM
 

juju
Welcome to the World!

Member since 5/05

6747 total posts

Name:

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

If I were 21 again and newly married, I would wait 4 years and TTC when I am 25. If I had met DH early on, I would of wanted children at age 25 or 26. I am having difficulty TTC at 34 and only had I met DH sooner.

Good Luck in what you decide to do!

ETA: Until you decide to TTC, Continue to go to your Gyno to make sure everything is okay.

Posted 5/12/05 10:28 AM
 

bluegrl24NY
LIF Infant

Member since 5/05

297 total posts

Name:
Helena

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

It's such a personal question, I guess all I can suggest is that you and your DH really sit down and talk about how your lives will be altered by a baby, what costs will be involved, how your work schedules will be affected, who will care for the baby during working hours, etc... Personally though, I am 26 now and still feel like I'm too young/not ready to have a baby! I also feel like I'm not ready mentally just quite yet, and I guess I want to be a little more stable before having a baby - whenever that may be! Some days I feel like such a total psycho, and I think, "I'm going to be someone's MOM?!" Chat Icon Also, as nuts as it sounds, having a puppy has really put a lot of my baby questions into perspective, and I'm glad we're waiting a little bit. You're a doggie mommy too, so I'm sure you have nothing but endless amounts of love for your babies! I can't help but wonder what it's going to be like when Craig and I have a baby - I think my heart might just burst with all that loveChat Icon Then again, we can leave our dog alone all day and don't have to worry about sending him to day care or things that would be factors with a baby. The finance thing really scares me too, but like someone else said, if we all waited for finances to be right, then no one would have babies! We'll most likely start trying in the next year though. Do what you feel is right for you though! Chat Icon

Posted 5/12/05 11:59 AM
 

FeliciaDP

Member since 5/05

18599 total posts

Name:
Mommy

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

Posted by MrsProfessor

I wish I'd met my DH when I was younger and we didn't have to "rush" to TTC. If I were you, I would enjoy the time you have with your DH, and the freedom you have. You have so much time to have a baby.



Took the words out of my mouth!

I have been trying to get pregnant since our wedding, but that is 99% because I am 35 years old now and really know that I cannot take too much time to wait and see what happens. As things stand, I am having some difficulties conceiving, so to push it off until my later 30s just wouldn't be wise for me.

We aren't exacxtly financially SOUND and we do need to find a bigger apartment/house BUT I know that in the end we are totally, completely ready to be parents and the financial /living situaiton will work itself out.

BUT had I only met DH earlier in my life, I will admit I would have definitely waited a few years before TTC..

Jess at 21 years old I was totally about ME and what I doing in my life at that point (I did have a live in boyfriend BUT I was entirely about hanging out, partying, traveling, etc) I was in no way ready for having children and tototally needed to find myself

That said, its hard for any of us to be in your shoes and know what YOU are feeling and what you want. While my instinct is to tell you to wait and enjoy your husband and married life together, I'm sure you would be a wonderful mom and if that is what your desire is, far be it from us to tell you otherwise

GLChat Icon

Message edited 5/12/2005 12:11:58 PM.

Posted 5/12/05 12:10 PM
 

Jesaroo
is not the girl you knew

Member since 5/05

14266 total posts

Name:
Jes

Re: Ok.. so should i wait?

yeah. i had always said when i'm 25.

i know i really should wait.

i know we will. i agree that i still have alot of living to do!

i guess just sometimes the thought pops inot my mind... and last night was one of those times.

every month before i get AF i freak out and think i'm PG. (i get VERY paraniod ) and then i think "what if im PG?....that would be Ok! I'd like that"

as you may have guess i'm waiting for AF and thats why its on my mind so much i guess.
(i forgot to write it down last month)

I guess I have enough with 3 dogs for now, they can be my babies!!



Chat Icon :Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon Chat Icon
thansk for all the advice. you've reinforced my own opinions again!

Posted 5/12/05 12:18 PM
 
 

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