Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

So I just found out that #2 is on the way (yeah!!). Of course before I knew the sex, many friends and family members told me how much they hoped I would have a girl this time . My FIL has even told me how wonderful it is to have a boy and girl and that "you can feel complete once you have both" .

So, I'm probably being hormonal, but I'm dreading the thought of even sharing the gender news with people. I'm also afraid that this baby will be over-looked simply because "he's another boy." It's not that I care about gifts per say, but I just think this baby would have been more celebrated if he had been the opposite gender.

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

I have 2 girls and I LOVE having 2 of the same sex. My girls are equally loved by our family.


I must admit I wanted my second DD to be a boy so that I would have one of each, but now I am so happy with the way everything turned out. I love watching them doing girly things together like playing with their doll house. I am sure you will have some of those great moment with your boys!


Congrats on having another boy!

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

I totally know what your saying !! When I was pregnant with #3 my FIL kept sayng I need to give him a boy ( I have 2 other girls) so I found out I was having another girl and she was treated as if she was my 1st !! So I dont think it affected anything and everyone got me tons of things too !! Oh and the experience of watching them interact with eachother as 3 sisters is priceless

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

People stink I am pregnant with #2 and final and I WANT another girl. I can't imagine my DD without a sister to love. I think two boys is lovely and they will be the best of friends. Why is it assumed that having one of each is the ideal?

Congrats on your pregnancy and stop telling people anything. They just annoy you in the end

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

I think people should keep their mouths closed about commenting on gender...LIKE YOU HAVE A CHOICE!!! That is what makes me laugh...a friend of mine had a girl...her coworker (a male) told her husband "too bad he couldn't have given her a boy". People are weird.

I have never experienced in my family any child getting the shaft b/c they had two of the same gender. Every baby was celebrated and loved the same...

I actually hope for a second boy. I would love for my son to have a brother to play with (a girl would be fine too!) but another boy would melt my heart And I know my family would love either...a HEALTHY baby is what counts and most sane minded people know that!

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

My boys are 20 months apart and are the best of friends. I do not think that #2 got shafted AT all.

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

well i have 3 boys.. no girls and i love how they are together. it's so fun to watch them play together!

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

No way! I love having 2 girls and hoped for it to be that way for the kids sake. People ask if we wanted a boy or are going to try for a boy but I just say No, I feel blessed with the 2 girls!

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

i agree with u--there is so much pressure for me to have a girl now that I have DS---but you know what?? screw these people--we will love our kiddies no matter what!!

i am convinced that people dont think

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

I am chiming in here but I have a girl and expecting a boy. I get comments all the time from people saying oh you must be so happy you have the pair now, or you must feel complete etc etc and it actually takes me aback. I would have loved 2 girls b/c I never had a sister so I wouldn't have minded a best friend for my dd. But I take what God gives me I would have been ecstatic either way.

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

No, not at all!! I have two girls and I love it. My MIL made it no secret that she was hoping for another girl (I guess having 3 sons and 5 grandsons makes you want to balance the scales a bit!). When I was pregnant, everyone assumed I wanted a boy but in fact, I felt just the opposite.

I really couldn't have cared less what anyone thought...but I guess I can see where you're coming from. Before I was in the picture, my SIL had given birth to her 3rd son and my DH said he was so disgusted because it seemed nobody cared; like you said..."he's another boy."

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

We aren't finding out what gender # 2 is yet- but I feel the same way...Actually to be honest, when we were expecting #1 ( and didnt find out gender) I can't tell you how many people were "hoping" for a girl ...I was - especially given the fact that DH and I went through many years of fertility treatments to have a baby and were thrilled regardless of gender...Now #2 is on the way and I'm hearing the same nonsense again- Comments like " Oh wouldnt it be nice if its a girl this time" and "I bet your hoping for a little girl" ...This comes from complete strangers and very close family members- Again with this pg, I am thrilled regardless and I say that with all my heart...This baby , just like any other is a blessing, and perhaps due to our fertility struggles, I am a bit more sensitive to their comments but it really makes me irate...And maybe its me, but usually it does seem to be boys who get the shaft for whatever reason

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE having two boys. They are almost 15 months apart.
Not going to lie but everyone was hoping for a girl the second time around, but I secretely wanted another boy.

They are so good to eachother. They play very well together and have the same interest in toys. They just started wrestling but in a fun way. I also think it's easier when it comes to buying clothes and toys. I can already tell that they will be best friends forever.

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

We only have one DD now but I'd love to have another girl so that they can grow up and be great sisters the way that I am with my sisters.

We are only going to have 2 kids and honestly I am not close with my brother at all ---- so I'd love to have another girl for my DD with hopes that they'd have a close relationship growing up!

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

I have no clue why people think just because you have the the same sex children you life isn't complete With 2 girls i hear it all the time..aren't you gonna go for the boy? NO!! I'm not! I wanted two kids and i've been blessed with 2 beautiful girls.
SOrry i'm upset for you

But No my 2nd isn't overlooked, but i can tell you with #2 i didn't expect people to not be as excited as they were with #1: The same people did'nt come to visit, she didn't get as many gifts as my 1st. ..i was told that's just he way it is :mad

Re: Parents of same gender children -- do you think the 2nd got the shaft?

I definately do. I felt like no one cared I was pregnant the second time around (2nd ). I do believe it would have been a much bigger deal if it was a girl. BUT I have to say I didn't get many negative comments. Most people said how great it was that they could be best friends. I DO feel like he is getting shafted as second hand everything. My mom and others WANT to buy new clothes and things but honestly everything is in perfect shape considering most things were only worn a few times so I don't let them.