Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

DH does his fair share around here. He:
- does dishes ( I cook he cleans)
-deals with garbage
-does laundry (we have to go to the laundromat, and it't hard for me with Bella)

I really wish he would be neater though. He doesn't clean up after himself and it drives me nuts. His clothes are everywhere. He also tends to start projects and not finish( babyproofing)

He doesn't get to spend a lot of time with Bella during the week because of work, only about an hour a day. We spend all day Friday and Saturday together. Once I go back to work he'll have her all day on Fridays.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

I leave for work before any gets up (if DC cooperate... ). I am out of work like a shot at 4:30, to get home to my family. DW (SAHM) cooks, but not because I avoid it, but I care about their well-being, so I don't let them suffer through my attempts...

I have 4yo DS almost exclusively from dinner until bedtime. I always brush his teeth and tuck him in. We usually play outside together from around 6 until 7:30, until it gets dark. I take DS to karate on Sat, and we hang out together and go shopping for toys if he cooperates. If not, we hang out together at home. DS is my clone, so we have a great time together. I try to spend as much time as humanly possible with DC, even when I'm exhausted from a long day at work. A lot of the time, after dinner, I just want to sit on the couch and watch TV, but when DS asks me to go outside and play with him, how can I say no?

DD is 14 months, so DW is still the primary, even when I'm home. I often offer to take DD, so DW can take a shower, get stuff out of the car, etc. DW gets up in the middle of the night to deal with DD about 75% of the time. Now that DD is starting to walk, she often comes into DS's bedroom to play with the two of us.
I do change diapers, feed DC, bathe them, etc., just no where near as much as DW.

Chores: loading/unloading dishwasher
vacuuming/steam cleaning
any and all repairs, inside and out
cutting grass

DW does all of the laundry, cooking, getting the mail, majority of the garbage duty.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

I yell at my husband to help me more especially on the weekends but I guess he is not that bad! he at least does the laundry, does the dishes if I dont have the time to do them, he will go to the store on his way from work if we need something and he will cook sometimes if he doesnt falls asleep on the couch watching tv lol he is terrible with changing diapers though, he will hand over ds to me and come up with some lame excuse not to do it...

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

Sorry you are going through this but thank God I can't relate, nor would I put up with it! DH and I share the responsibilities and takes up my slack when I need it and vice versa. Wouldn't have it any other way.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

As far as household chores he

-Takes the garbage out
-Does the cat litter-sweeps bathroom floor ( after emptying cat litter)
-Vaccums the house
-Does the laundry every saturday

He helps me feed tha ctas and the dog and clean up after them.

As far as Noah goes, he feeds him his night bottle, sometimes two and changes him and hangs out with him in the evnings ( he has sports 2x a week though where he doesnt)..

On weekends( Friday night, Saturday-Sunday)..He takes over a lot of Noahs care so I can rest and do errands and stuff and he gets up with Noah at night Friday and Saturday nights....


IMO, he does a lot and will help if I ask him to....

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

Puts dishes in the dishwasher
Does his own laundry ( or he wil have to walk around in dirty undwear.)
Mows lawn and does most outside labor.
Takes complete responsiblity for my son while I am at work one day a week (including feeding, dressing,etc)
Gives baths about half the time.
Helps with spring cleaning

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

Mine cooks a lot ...thats about it.
Never once took a night feeding, never changes diapers, doesnt know how to give DS a bath or put him to bed....

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

DH does a lot of the work around the house except for the vacuuming, bathrooms and the dusting. He puts Jacob to bed every night

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

I probably complain more than I should, because reading these responses makes me realize I am super lucky. DH is awesome when it comes down to it and splitting responsibilities around the house. However, Mon-Saturday, he is at work all day, for long hours, so the majority of the child and house care falls on me. But when he is home, he is a tremendous help... He spends all his time with the kids, gives me alone time, and helps out with them by feeding and cleaning up after them.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

•vacuum floors in all bedrooms and couches weekly
•take out garbage & recycling
•change DD's poop bin in her room
•make bottles (wash & dry and make formula daily)
•clean litter box daily
•feed cats & dogs evening & night
•pick up/change dogs pee pads
•pick up DD from sitter 3x a week

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

My DH is home all summer right now because he is a teacher. I'm sure this will probably change once he goes back to work.

He takes out the garbage
Will cook occasionally (or BBQ for us)
Always takes the dog out for her nightly walk.

I do the laundry, dishes, the daily cleaning (although we do have cleaning people come every other week), I make and clean all the bottles (I am anal and would worry if the exact amount wasn't put in)

He is great with the baby though. He does everything I do (well, almost everything) - He changes him, feeds him, plays with him, will do middle of the night feedings if I am completely exhausted, takes him for walks, etc. Whether or not this changes when he goes back to work ---- we'll see!

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

DH will
Feed Kerri
He gives her her bath
Change her
Put her to bed
Take her for walks
Plays with her everyday


He also
does the laundry
does the grocery shopping
cooks 90% of the time
takes out the garbage
Cleans the bathtub (I hate doing that)

Message edited 8/1/2007 5:23:21 PM.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

Okay, I can relate.

I go to school 15 credit hours, work two jobs (30 hours at one, about 12 hours at the other a week, sometimes more.), all the laundry, take care of three kids, cook dinner, and clean house. He works full time and when he get s home it is either in front of the TV or the computer. I get so tired of doing it all, then getting yelled at because I ordered pizza for dinner. It is tiring, but I manage, I just tell him what I want him to do and he will do it.

Basically, he is lazy. He does not play with the kids like he used to and he sometimes goes to bed at like 9, so I am left with baths and getting 3 kids ready for bed. Granted my older kids are self sufficient, but still they need attention as well.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

DH works FT. As soon as he walks in the door he kisses DS and I hello, runs upstairs, gets changed comes down and grabs DS. He LOVES spending time with him.
We eat dinner and then they have more play time.
We both but DS to bed around 8-8:30.

Around the house He:
Vacuums
Cleans litter box (this is a shared job--sometimes I NEED to do it)
Takes DS on walks
and on the weekends he watches, feeds, and plays with DS while I do laundry and a good cleaning to the house. When I am done inside, he takes care of the outside.
He takes out the garbage *sometimes* as well.

Note: Sometimes I do have to ASK for help. He doesn't usually just get up and do it.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

Well M - F I do 90% of it. He's getting ready for work while I feed the baby, he leaves, I get ready for work, I drop off, I work FT, I pick up, I play, I feed, I bathe, he usually walks in on final bottle. I put her down, I cook, we eat, he sorta helps clean the dishes (he claims he's not good at it )

So he watches TV and I clean.

He does garbage, cat litter, clean pool, and all the "manly" stuff inside/outside the house.

I do the laundry, clean the house (I do have a service every 2 weeks), run errands, etc.

Weekends he spends alot of time with DD (when he's not playing golf)

He's a great husband and an amazing dad, he's just not around a whole alot to help , but he would if he was.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

He watches the baby in the evening while I work--- he does dinner and all the baby stuff and laundry-- as well as study and prep for his job the next day....

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

We were always 50/50, till I became a sahm.

he works close to 70 hours each week though.

I don't know, I don't know what I am suppose to be responsible for. I know he is capable of putting his cereal bowl in the sink. I know if you drop a cheerio on the floor, pick it up.

He is good with Josh though, they go on these 3-4 hour walks together on his days off. He gets up every morning on 3 hours of sleep, picks Josh up out of crib, changes him, sings to him, then brings him to me. It doesn't sound like a lot, but it is. I am glad they have that special thing, even if its only a few minutes...then DH goes back to bed.

I had a breakdown 2 weeks ago. I felt like a slave. His famous line was "I don't care what this place looks like as long as you don't ask me to clean it"

He did not know, but for a month I wrote down on the calendar everytime he washed his dish. During the breakdown, he claimed to do the dishes at times. I was able to point out the exact 6 dishes he washed that month.

I threatened to go back to work. He said he will try harder....he has. Yesterday I came home from the gym and the whole apt was clean.

who knows what next week will bring though? we have a garbage service so he doesn't have that chore. live in an apt, so no yard to tend to. I do almost everything all the time, he is trying.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

my dh (i love that someone said darn husband) handles the drop off and pick up of my DD every day. he does not get her ready or feed her breakfast before doing so, and if i have not done so i wind up dropping her off myself. other than that my husband does absolutely nothing except occasionally take out the garbage and walk the dog. he does work 2 jobs and a decent amount of overtime so i excuse it. some days though i am near my breaking point when i find towels all over the bathroom floor!!!

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

DH is great and I feel very lucky to have him. I am a SAHM so I do all the household chores such as food shopping, cooking, cleaning. However ,on the weekends DH does almost everything with Alex. Feeds him, dresses him, takes him with to the stores, bathes him pretty much everything. During, the week DH also reads Alex his bedtime stories and does the nightly routine.

If I was in your position, I would have a talk with DH and tell him how you feel.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

My DH helps me with everything, he knows better!

Seriously, DH is really good about helpng me around the house, he has a crazy job (own business with his father), and hes also a Fireman, but always makes time for his family. As soon as he gets home from work he helps me out with Julia and just takes care of her. Whatever I need him to do he does!

DH: Takes care of the cats (littebox, and feeds them)
Does the laundry
Helps me clean the house on the weekends.
Cleans the kitchen after I make dinner

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

My DH takes out the garbage (to the street)

puts clothes in washing machine, always forgets about the dryer part and then they wind up sitting and smelling and I have to re-wash them..

cuts lawn/edging...

As far as DS goes, he is with him M/T/F
mornings from 8am till 2pm.. so he feeds, diapers, bathes.. etc.. Weekends I let him sleep in.. but whatever i ask, he just does.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

Dh and dd are usually still sleeping when I leave for work- so dh gets her up, dressed and ready for daycare then drops her off every day.

I pick her up around 4ish, dh usually does not get home from work until at least 7 sometimes later, almost never earlier. As far as baby stuff, he pretty much does everything I do when he is home except give her baths, that is all me.

As far as housework, we are both lacking in this area so we have a cleaning lady come every other week for heavy duty stuff. The light day to day stuff is mostly my mess, so I try and clean it.

Re: Please share your husbands responsibilities with me..I AM STRESSED OUT!

I lucked out.

weekday mornings - DH takes DD when she wakes up around 6 or 7am. He feeds her, changes her and dresses her and I sleep until he leaves for work - 8:30 or 9ish.

He does the laundry (I fold)
He cleans the bathroom
He cooks dinner most nights