Pushy people

I've posted about this before.....I wanted to plan on how to decorate our baby room. It's our first child and I think I have a right to do it the way I want. Mil went ahead and started doing crafty projects to put in the baby room even though they do not match the color scheme we picked out. As a compromise DH told his mom we would put them up in the play room. She also wanted to do a mural so we compromised and told her she can do an all white one. She shows up yesterday with a decorative piece she made that again does not match the colors of the room. At this point I just let them put it up. I don't know how many times I have to keep repeating myself about how I want to decorate.

Then a family member SO goes out (she is well aware of how annoyed I was with MIL about the items to be hung in baby room)and buys a cross and drops it off before we even have our shower so we can hang it up in the baby room. We havent even started to set up the baby room. She is well aware of my stance on religion and how I feel about people pushing their faith on DH and I. She knows that I refuse to attend the church that her and my entire family go to. We do not plan on raising our child like that. When she gives me the cross she tells me well " i figured it's one little cross it's not going ro hurt to hang it up in the baby room." Ummm sorry but what if I was a different religion? I would think a cross would have significant meaning to people. I kind of took offense to that. DH refuses to hang the cross.

I just don't get why people have to be so freaking pushy.

Re: Pushy people

I am going to play a little devil's advocate here.

As annoying as they sound - and I would get really annoyed too. I think they are excited about your baby and are showing it in their own way. If your MIL was already told the theme and is STILL giving you things for the baby's room that doesn't go then I would have your DH sit and talk with her. Maybe give her pics of what your doing so she can still make something that matches.

I totally agree you should decorate the way that you and DH want to. I am not sure of the motive of the person who gave you a cross, but I have given crosses before and wouldn't have thought of it as pushing my religion on someone else. I would have thought of it as giving something important to me (a blessing) to a new baby.

Either way, still do what you and DH want to do! You can always place that cross in a drawer or in the closet if it doesn't suit your belief.

Pushy people

Normally I would say to give them the benefit of the doubt but it seems they are being bit more rude and inconsiderate given what you've told them. I would definitely be firm if they keep doing things like this.

Re: Pushy people

When my 1st was born, everyone was overstepping because he was the first baby in the family so I can relate. I put up what they gave me as far as room decorations, little statues, toys, etc for the first few months and then removed the things I didn't like. When they came over, I'd tell them I decided to change the look of the room but saving the items I removed. It was mainly things from my MIL, SIL & DH's grandmother. I think for you, if you want to leave out the cross, since you are not raising your child with a religion, do not put that up otherwise I can see the future gifts being jewelry with a cross or a baby bible.

Pushy people

So now do I say something to her about the cross? She has asked me if we put it up yet and I was honest and told her no but I also told her we weren't doing anything in the room until the furniture was delivered.