Question for Moms of 2 or more....

When you had your 2nd+ child, how did it affect your 1st?

Did the newborn wake your older child(ren)?

Did your older child(ren) act out? If so, how long did it last?

What are the age differences?

My DD will be 18 months when DS is born and their rooms are right next to each other. I'm scared the baby will wake up DD.

Any advice on anything related to the first few months of a 2nd child (naps, feedings, behavior changes, minimizing jealousy, etc.) would be very appreciated!!


As you can tell I'm getting nervous! I'm not even supposed to be on this site at work

Message edited 4/28/2008 9:33:16 AM.

Re: Question for Moms of 2 or more....

DD1 was 2 1/2 when I had Melanie. She started acting out a lot, and she would pinch her sister's face. It lasted for the first month and then she calmed down a bit.

She was super clingy for a while and followed me everywhere. Melanie was a very mellow baby so she never cried enough to make Miranda wake up.

Re: Question for Moms of 2 or more....

Mine are 3 days shy of being 2 years apart. We actually brought Lauren home on Andrew's 2nd birthday. There was about a week's transition time with Andrew - I guess he kept wondering why she wasn't going back, but once he figured out she was staying, he was fine.

She never woke him up - he was in his own room, which is right next door and even shares a wall. For the first 3 months she was in our room anyway before going into her crib in the nursery.

Andrew became my little helper - he loves to get her diaper out and hand me wipes as I needed them. I always made sure he had something to do when it was time for me to feed her. Just involve the older child as much as possible and explain each time you do something that you did the same for them.

Good Luck! Don't be nervous, I did not find the transition to two be to that hard at all.

Re: Question for Moms of 2 or more....

Robbie was 26 months when Noah was born and he was a champ about having a new baby in the house.

He did become a LITTLE more clingy - wanting to hold me and climb on me and be on my lap as much as possible. But overall he was curious about the baby and loved him.

We co-slept - so Robbie and Noah were both in bed with us when Noah was an infant. Robbie was not allowed to spend the night next to Noah - but he loved him so much that he would often curl up and fall asleep next to him before we would move him. When the baby woke up during the night, Robbie would sometimes stir a bit - but he didn't wake up. I would either nurse Noah or take him in the other room to change and soothe him until he calmed down.

They are now the best of friends (and the worst of enemies sometimes!). They still fall asleep in a little puppy pile once in a while.

Robbie is a really mellow kid - and Noah is not. So things may have been different if NOAH was the first born!

ETA: They both want me to have another baby now. They actually dressed bed pillows in their clothes and called them Eric and Sarah and told me they were their twin brother and sister.

They keep telling Rob and I that if we give them a brother or sister they will change the diapers and feed them. I guess they already have a dog so a sibling is the next thing to beg for on their list!

Message edited 4/28/2008 9:58:09 AM.

Re: Question for Moms of 2 or more....

When I had my 2nd, DS was 15 months. They did wake each other up but it was only for a short period of time so it wasn't that bad. They needed to get used to each other.
DS thankfully was not jealous of the baby. I also made sure I gave lots of attention to my oldest and that also helped alot.

Re: Question for Moms of 2 or more....

Posted by rojerono
ETA: They both want me to have another baby now. They actually dressed bed pillows in their clothes and called them Eric and Sarah and told me they were their twin brother and sister.

They keep telling Rob and I that if we give them a brother or sister they will change the diapers and feed them. I guess they already have a dog so a sibling is the next thing to beg for on their list!

Re: Question for Moms of 2 or more....

Mine are 20 months apart...

DD is not jealous of her sister really at all, I was shocked! Although she is jealous when my mom or grandma play with the baby, she wants their attention but not me or DH, strange.

The baby hasn't woken her up, she slept pretty well from the beginning and I have white noise machines, humidifiers, etc all going so no one can hear anything...

The napping for the baby has been a little hard b/c I have to take DD to school 3x/week and it messes her up but when we're home I try to keep it semi-consistent.

I try to include my older one in "helping"...Help mommy give Casey a bath, help her change the diaper etc... so far it has worked...