Read something beautiful today regarding having a child born with a disability and wanted to share

Welcome to Holland by Emily Perl Kingsley

I am often asked to describe the experience of raising a child with a disability - to try to help people who have not shared that unique experience, to understand it, to imagine how it would feel.20It's like this...When you're going to have a baby, it's like planning a fabulous vacation trip - to Italy. You buy a bunch of guide books and make your wonderful plans. The Coliseum. Michelangelo's David. The gondolas in Venice. You may learn some handy phrases in Italian. It's all very exciting.
After months of eager anticipation, the day finally arrives. You pack your bags and off you go. Several hours later, the plane lands. The stewardess comes in and says, "Welcome to Holland."
"Holland ?!?" you say. "What do you mean Holland ?? I signed up for Italy! All my life I've dreamed of going to Italy."
But there's been a change in the flight plan. They've landed in Holland and there you must stay.
The important thing is that they haven't taken you to a horrible, disgusting, filthy place, full of pestilence, famine and disease. It's just a different place.
So you must go out and buy new guide books. And you must learn a whole new language. And you will meet a whole new group of people you would never have met.
It's just a different place. It's slower-paced than Italy, less flashy than Italy. But after you've been there for a while and you catch your breath, you look around... and you begin to notice that Holland has windmills... and Holland has tulips. Holland even has Rembrandts.
But everyone you know is busy coming and going from Italy...and they're all bragging about what a wonderful time they had there. And for the rest of your life, you will say: "Yes, that's where I was supposed to go. That's what I had planned."
And the pain of that will never, ever, ever, ever go away... because the loss of that dream is a very, very significant loss.
But... if you spend your life mourning the fact that you didn't get to Italy, you may never be free to enjoy the very special, the very lovely things... about Holland.

Re: Read something beautiful today regarding having a child born with a disability and wanted to share

I am still mourning Italy! Honestly I feel I was cheated.

Re: Read something beautiful today regarding having a child born with a disability and wanted to share

Posted by smdl

I am still mourning Italy! Honestly I feel I was cheated.

Re: Read something beautiful today regarding having a child born with a disability and wanted to share

Posted by smdl

I am still mourning Italy! Honestly I feel I was cheated.

Re: Read something beautiful today regarding having a child born with a disability and wanted to share

Posted by hbugal

Posted by smdl

I am still mourning Italy! Honestly I feel I was cheated.

Oh Sophie

I wish that I could help you to see that someday....somewhere down the road...it will all make sense.

Whenever I talk to a parent of a child with a disability I always say the same thing. Dont let their disability get in the way of enjoying them...

When my daughter was young I spent so much time trying to keep her "normal" that I missed out on her just being her. Once I learned to enjoy HER I stopped wishing that things were different so much...

Re: Read something beautiful today regarding having a child born with a disability and wanted to share

Posted by smdl

Posted by hbugal

Posted by smdl

I am still mourning Italy! Honestly I feel I was cheated.

Oh Sophie

I wish that I could help you to see that someday....somewhere down the road...it will all make sense.

Whenever I talk to a parent of a child with a disability I always say the same thing. Dont let their disability get in the way of enjoying them...

When my daughter was young I spent so much time trying to keep her "normal" that I missed out on her just being her. Once I learned to enjoy HER I stopped wishing that things were different so much...

H -- I love DS with all my heart. My love for him as never stopped or diminished. I still cover him in kisses (poor kid!!). I do not compare him to other kids. He IS the love of my life. He truly is!

I just wish we could experience the normal stuff, you know! Like what other moms report here. I DO miss that part.

Re: Read something beautiful today regarding having a child born with a disability and wanted to share

I don't have a child with a disability, but this is such a beautiful comparison. I can see this as a comparison that can be applied to so many things in life that didn't turn out exaclty as planned, but end up being beautiful just the same in their special own way. Thank for sharing this.