Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

DC's 1st birthday is the last week in July. DH & I always planned on having a big party in our backyard. We planned to have the party July 21 with a raindate on the 22nd, (we expect 100+ people).

MIL tells DH that she is going to SIL's timeshare in Pennsylvania that week, and doesn't want to come home early, because she wants to "make a novena" at a shrine nearby. She said if we have to party on the 22nd, she will come back for it.

DH wants us to change the date to the 22nd to accommodate his mother and sister (who is really behind this), and pray it doesn't rain. Even with a tent, I am NOT comfortable planning a party for over 100 people without a raindate.

The following weekend is out for a number of reasons:
1. It is my brother's 30th birthday and I don't want to intrude on his day or have the twins share there celebration.
2. MY DC are getting their 12 month shots the day before and I don't want to risk them not feeling well for their party.

I suggested having 2 parties, one for my family and our friends (the bulk of the crowd), and a second one the following week for his family. DH doesn't like this idea because "it seems like we're divorced."

So ladies, what should I do? Am I wrong to stick to my guns and have the party on the 21st, or should I give in to MIL and change the date?

I feel like she is pulling the same sh*t she pulled with my wedding.

Message edited 6/17/2007 12:42:43 PM.

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

I would have the party on the day you intended on having it.

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

Did you MIL know about your plans, or did she find out after she had planned her trip? If she booked the timeshare before you picked the party date, I think you should do it on the 18th.

Note: You can move the shots another week, those aren't time sensitive.

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

I don't think I would change the date.
Why cant you're Mil change her date for that week, You are having a big party and she doesn't even offer to help you, and she wants u to change the date..
I think this is a little nervy...

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

This is more about your relationship with your DH than with your MIL because ultimately that is the relationship that counts the most.

I'm not sure how religious your mother in law is or how a novena can't fit earlier into her plans so that she can be home on her grandchildren's birthday. I would ask my DH why she can't do it earlier if she's going to be there all week unless it has to be done on a particular day.

If it were me, I would keep the date. If she can't be there, then it's her choice. I would have a second party for her.

Tell her while she's making the novena to pray for rain also.

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

Thanks for the input Ladies. DH and I are going to sit down today and make our final decision.

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

Honestly, I do not get along great with my mother-in -law, BUT I would probably change the date as long as invites have not gone out yet. Why? cause that is what I aould do for my own mother and I try to be fair. She is also a grandma. Would you do that for your own mother? Did she know the date before booking trip? Did she have a choice on when the timeshare is available. Many timeshares have an assigned week. I would not want this to come back at me later on when I wanted to change a date for my own family. JMO

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

Re: Reality check needed- Am I wrong?

Posted by nrthshgrl


Tell her while she's making the novena to pray for rain also.