School related issue Teachers please respond

I need some advice on how to proceed with the following, relatively minor, issue...

The following issue has to do with one of my 10 year old, 5th grade, twins...

When configuring his classroom my daughters teacher placed his students desks into tables and then assigned them to their seats. My daughter is at a table of 4 with 3 boys. Some tables are tables of 5 and all the other tables contain a mixed ratio of boys and girls. My daughter voiced some concerns over the seating arrangment but I told her that Im sure he would be changing things around soon enough...

Well it's now December and my daughter is still the only girl at this "table". It is feasible for the teacher to arrange the seating in such a way so that no girl would be the only girl at a table and likewise for boys...

They do a lot of group activities within each "table" and it would be nice for her to have another girl to socialize with. It is something that she is ready to deal with but I feel that it's not necessary for her to...KWIM?

I have her teacher conference coming up and I plan to voice this concern to her teacher...

She is already afraid of him..he doesnt have the best reputation...is known for favoring boys etc..

How should I handle it? My request is not that he just move her seat but rather that he changes his seating all together so that she doesnt look singled out...

Thank....

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

I'm not a teacher.. but I play one on tv...

Last year Robbie's teacher did 'blocks' of desks. I was a little annoyed because the block included one of Robbie's best friends and the two of them together are trouble in a box. I asked the teacher why she chose the arrangement and she said she tried to keep similar skill levels together and also have a little mix of maturity levels. So there was a science behind it.. not just a random mosh. When the boys DID start acting up together she wound up changing the seating. I guess it was trial and error.

If your daughter is uncomfortable being in that group, I'd talk to the teacher and maybe he can rearrange the seating or add another child in. But I think you would have to let him know it bothers her a bit during the conference.

ETA: If the teachers 'reputation' is from kids, I wouldn't pay much heed.. you know how THAT works! Even if it is other parent experience.. well one persons monster is another person's angel!

Message edited 12/2/2009 5:26:24 PM.

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

I would just plainly say, "I was wondering if the students will have the same seats for the whole year because of XYZ (the reasons you stated)"

If he says he will change her seat, I would just ask if he could possible change a few seats so it doesnt look like she is the problem etc.

It's a very simple request and he shouldn't have a problem with it.

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

I don't see anything wrong with letting the teacher know that she is a bit uncomfortable with a table of all boys and would it be ok to mix it up a bit.

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

As a teacher I would advise that you definitely bring this up to your daughters teacher. I once had a class of 26 students, only 3 were girls, it was awful (I teach 8th grade so for the girls it was only for 45 min a day). I saw first hand how shut down the girls were because they were uncomfortable. I always put them in a group together, sat them together, and PRAYED their parents would say something to the principle, but they never did. Most likely, the teacher made the seating chart and hasn't thought about it since. Once you speak with him if the seats are not changed in a reasonable time (within a week or so), I would definitely contact the principle. Good luck!

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

Sorry to crash! When I taught third grade, I moved the seats once a month. On open house night I got a lot of questions about when/how often seats would be moved. I did it randomly the first month and then once I got to know the children and their personalities I was better able to sit them in the spot in the class that would be best for them with the children they would work with best. I only had 6 girls in my class, so once a month one girl was by herself with the boys, but that next month I made sure she was at the table with another girl.

I agree with the above suggestions. Bring it up at the conference.

Message edited 12/2/2009 6:32:45 PM.

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

I would ask the teacher if he would be changing seats soon. If not, I would request that he changes a few seats (your daughter's included) so that she can interact with other students in the class as well

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

It is so funny to read this since I got an email today about asking to change a child's seat in my class.

I think that you should certainly address it with the teacher. I get that not every child is going to be sitting with their friends or people they necessarily get along with all the time, but I change the seats once a month so that they at least get a change of pace. I would let him know that she is uncomfortable being the only girl, and while she is handling it well, it would be nice if the seats were changed for all.

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

I don't know if you need to ask that he change multiple seats so that your DD does not seem singled out- I would bet that there is at least one other child in the room who could benefit from a seat change. So I'd ask that her seat be changed, and leave it at that.

As a teacher who groups, I never, ever put one girl alone with a group of boys. Nor do I put one boy alone with a group of girls (though double standard be damned, I think many of my boys would really like that! )

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

Not a teacher either but I play one on the internet too.

I would bring it up, but I would also encourage her to ask him privately first. I know it's a big thing to ask for a 10 year old but helping her manage uncomfortable situations on her own would benefit her more in the long run.

Re: School related issue Teachers please respond

I use cooperative learning ALL the time. I would never construct a group with 1 girl or 1 boy and the rest being opposite sexed. I either mix it or I make it homogenously grouped. I also switch their seats every 5-6 weeks so that if a group is not working then it is quickly replaced.

I would speak to the teacher privately and ask if seats will be switched soon and if not could she please be placed with a mixed group.