Soooo afraid of MIL......(long, sorry)

ok so she called last night and asked what nights we'll be staying there. DH tells her Tue, Wed, Thur and technically FRI even though we'll be leaving in the middle of the night.

She makes the probably snide comment that she "wants a few nights with Alyson" and DH says...you'll get them but she won't be much fun since she's been going to bed around 6pm.

My best friend gets the honor of babysitting her when we go to the wedding (DH told his mother that we might still take her to the wedding because I know she'll be mad if she knows my best friend is watching her overnight).

We are planning at least one night out to a bar to get together with friends (it's easier to just plan on going somewhere and telling everyone who wants to hang out to come meet up with us) and I am TERRIFIED that she's going to wake her up to play with her and DESTROY all the sleep training I've been doing.

Plus, Aly fusses in her sleep for her pacifier and I'm afraid she'll mistake that for her being "awake" and pick her up.

What do I do? SIL will be up there too and I'm going to plead my case with her to PLEASE make sure that Alyson is not woken up but I'm still scared that MIL will do it anyway. If I find out she does (of if she ticks me off) I'm packing DD up and going BACK to my parents house.

Re: Soooo afraid of MIL......(long, sorry)

I can see why you are worried- but I don't think one night of being woken by someone who is not you will ruin everything.

Try not to stress about it too much!

Re: Soooo afraid of MIL......(long, sorry)

but that is the issue...Alyson is VERY into her schedule at night and if she's woken up...it's chaos from there on. I had to wake her on several occasions from her morning nap and it ruined the ENTIRE day for her.

Plus, my MIL is so selfish that's all she can think about is what SHE wants...not what's best for my baby (including washing hands after her cigarette)

Re: Soooo afraid of MIL......(long, sorry)

Shana I get like this everytime my MIL watches DS-

Ill never forget the time her friend stopped by my house- and DS just happened to wake up (a child who sleeps well through the night) while she was there



All I can say is drill into her head... that its necessary that she needs her sleep...


In the end- as long as DS is still asleep when I get home- Im ok- (because I dont know )

Truthfully- things will be a little whacky since your in a different place... so you are gonna see a change while you are there or when you get home....

Re: Soooo afraid of MIL......(long, sorry)

When you travel with babies, their schedules get thrown off anyway. Chances are, the change of scene is going to mess w/the baby's sleep patterns, so why not allow Grandma some precious time with your beautiful daughter?

Also, I totally understand that you are frustrated b/c of the sleep training, but in the first year of the baby's life, it could be ANYTHING that throws off their sleep habits - teething, a fever, ear infection, etc. So what if on *one* night, it's your MIL waking her up?

Life is so short and no one LOVES you like your grandparents do! Let Alyson experience that love every single chance she gets. There's plenty of time for her to return to her schedule and sleep when you get back home. Try to enjoy the trip!

Re: Soooo afraid of MIL......(long, sorry)

Claud, I understand your point and if it were anyone else, I'd be fine with it. My MIL is a coniving, manipulative, selfish, and depressed person. It's all about her and she always thinks she is right and will undermine someone elses authority. My daughter has a routine that she is used to and I won't deviate from it. IF DD does, fine...I go with her flow, but I'll be damned if someone ELSE is going to do what THEY think is right for a child that THEY DON'T EVEN KNOW! (we live in GA, we'll be in NY)

The main reason I am not letting her watch DD while we are at this wedding is because she is a functional alcoholic and I am afraid if anything were to happen, she can't take her to the ER or the DR. There is no guarantee that anyone else will be home too.

She hogged her during the baptism weekend, taking her away from my sister to feed her (aww...can't I do that? everytime I want to, something comes up, I'm leaving today. My sis said "Umm...I'm leaving TOO today). DD got overwhelmed with being passed around and all she said was it was the applesauce I gave her....UM, NO. She didn't like all the stimulation and was overtired and NEEDED QUIET TIME...did anyone care? No...DH and I took her into another room away from everyone. It got to the point where I gave the 3 people that wanted her 10 min intervals (they had 30 min before leaving for the airport) so that DD would remain in a decent mood.

I'll be damned if she gets what she wants YET again. I refuse to give in to her.

Re: Soooo afraid of MIL......(long, sorry)

Let me just prepare you that a lot of your sleep training will have to be relearned once you get home. Babies sense being in a different environment and generally don't sleep the same or as well.
Just try to do the best you can and don't let it ruin your visit home.

Re: Soooo afraid of MIL......(long, sorry)

Posted by monkeybride

Let me just prepare you that a lot of your sleep training will have to be relearned once you get home. Babies sense being in a different environment and generally don't sleep the same or as well.
Just try to do the best you can and don't let it ruin your visit home.

Re: Soooo afraid of MIL......(long, sorry)

I agree with the other posters about their schedules being thrown off when they travel but I would also write the schedule down for MIL so she can see that this is a schedule and not just a way for her to have less time with Aly. (thinking like my mil )