Spinoff: Toddler Dinnertime Battles

Advice that helped us with dinnertime battes. I have no idea where I got it - I copied & pasted it a few years ago from a website. Referred back to it often as a reminder. Still works for us.

Hopefully will help anyone else going through it.
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My son is now 5 and we have created a monster that made meal time a horror. It all changed when I read an article in the newspaper. It said to only put what you expect the child to eat on their plate. You and your husband eat your meal and talk. Ignore the child until the meal is finished. Do not comment about the food.

This takes your child out of the spot light. If your child has not eaten what you gave them, leave them at the table (supervised) alone to finish. Give the child 20 more minutes to finish. This will give you a chance to clean up the dinner dishes. If they do not finish in that time frame, take the food up. If they say they are hungry later, they are served their dinner. If they still do not eat, they will go to bed without anything else.

You have to explain the rules to the child at every meal. I know it sound cruel, but it does works and it only takes 2-3 times. The reminders at each meal help to reinforce your expectations and the consequences. Good luck!

Re: Spinoff: Toddler Dinnertime Battles

That's great advice! Now I just have to grow a backbone and enforce it.

Re: Spinoff: Toddler Dinnertime Battles

When my DS is dawdling, we set a timer for him to finish. A realistic amount of time for a 4 year old (20 minutes for something he could easily eat in 5 minutes or less). It works wonders for some reason. It doesnt work so well with my 2 1/2 year old but she will respond to "no dessert" if she doesnt eat dinner. I will leave her plate on the table and let her be excused. She always comes back looking for dessert and the plate is still there. She's getting the message and has started eating some more of her meal. I dont expect them to always finish everything, I know thats not always the best message to send for future eating habits, but it has to be a reasonable amount of each item on the plate. Also I will put less on their plate to begin with sometimes and they finish and enjoy asking for seconds. Additionally, I've noticed if I cut out snacks altogether for at least 2 hours before the meal, they eat much better. My DS is at the "pleasepleaseplease" stage of trying to get what he wants but I stay strong. They do get a snack but not within the 2 hour time frame.
Overall my kids are good eaters, Im lucky in that respect but the dinner time battles can definitely occur even with the best eaters.

Message edited 1/23/2007 11:04:13 AM.

Re: Spinoff: Toddler Dinnertime Battles

Re: Spinoff: Toddler Dinnertime Battles

Thanks.

I don't have a problem enforcing this policy - when he understands what I'm mean when I say "If you don't eat this you are going to bed hungry" but I don't think he'll get that just yet. Although I do know people who have done this at much younger than 18 mos.

Re: Spinoff: Toddler Dinnertime Battles

OMG, I still have nightmares from my Grandmother doing this to me. I kid you not she would put my same pancakes out for every meal. Little did she know my Grandpa was feeding me on the side That guy was the greatest

Re: Spinoff: Toddler Dinnertime Battles

Re: Spinoff: Toddler Dinnertime Battles

Bump in case anyone else is going through this.

I was looking at old posts & came across this.

Re: Spinoff: Toddler Dinnertime Battles

We are, sometimes... I have also found that ignoring him works best! He always eats the most if I am doing something else. Thanks!