Re: Study: Spanking Kids Leads to More Aggressive Behavior

I haven't read the article or all the responses but for some kids, I can see it. Some kids respond to anger with more aggressive behavior. My oldest is one of those kids. If you have a charged up situation, he will get more charged up. The only way to diffuse it is to get quieter and calmer. And lets he honest, spanking is an angry (or fear-filled) gesture by a parent and is rarely a "swat on the butt" I'm not saying any parent that spanks is leaving bruises or welts but I just don't see a situation that is considered a spank worthy situation as one where the parent feels in control. Sorry if that offends those who are pro-spanking. I have spanked my kids so I am not claiming to be perfect or doing the dreaded holier than though post, but I think it makes situations worse, especially in certain personality types. Maybe you don't have one of these children but I do. I could totally see my son being more aggressive if he was spanked.

Re: Study: Spanking Kids Leads to More Aggressive Behavior

Posted by CrankyPants

Posted by Ophelia

Posted by QTDimps23


well said! i was never hit as a child and i am very against it. i dont see how it teaches the child not to do what they did wrong...except instill fear.

let me first say that I respect your decision completely.

I just want to bring up what I feel is a valid point. people talk about hitting only serving to instill fear. that it teaches nothing.

but what about things like time outs and taking away toys?

does that not also instill fear? it's just not fear of pain. it's fear of punishment. how does that "teach" anything more?

if you're not listening to mommy, how does 5 minutes in the corner teach any more of a lesson than a lil swat to the bum?

(I am genuinely asking here)

For me, I am comfortable teaching my child that there are repercussions for your behavior; I'm not okay with one of those repercussions being pain.

Also, IMO, time out or being sent to your room teaches a child to be reflective and that is something that I want to instill in my child.

Re: Study: Spanking Kids Leads to More Aggressive Behavior

I haven't read the story but..

I was spanked
I watched violent movies early on
I play Violent Video games
I watch Rated R movies
I drank by 14
I smoke by 11 (tho dad didnt know)

The HORROR!

Oddly enough I love my father. I appreciate what he has taught me and I was always the kid who held back if it came to fighting. I was never in a gang, I didn't sleep around, didnt even date much, I'm not a drug addict nor an alcoholic (actually I rarely drink)

Meh *shrug*

I think spanking, discipline,.... its all relative to HOW its delivered and why, etc. Too many factors to give it a blanket "no good" statement.

JMHO

ETA: I actually was pretty darned well behaved. I quit smoking young and started up later and quit finally in 2000. I was an A-B honor roll kid and NEVER lied to my dad. I think its all a gamble. Kids and parents both. You do what's best for your own. What works for some may not work for others.

Message edited 4/13/2010 8:14:20 PM.

Re: Study: Spanking Kids Leads to More Aggressive Behavior

I dont know how much I believe this article.. parenting is hard enough... and I think we all need to do what is right for our families.. I know I was never spanked.. I was disciplined in other ways.. time outs, etc... I was never afraid of my parents, I respected them and their authority... I hope to be as effective as they were for me to my daughter...

There are too many parents around today who try to be their kids friends.... and not parents... and those are the kids that I see in my classroom on a daily basis who have no respect for their peers or for their teachers... and that is the major problem that I have with parenting... I dont care if you put your kids in time out... or spank them from time to time... but lets remember to be PARENTS!!!