Thanks!

Thanks!

Message edited 8/6/2011 8:43:44 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

Does she have texture issues? Does she gag when she does eat on her own?

What happens if you just "left" her alone with the food to play with? Does she ever put food in her mouth willingly? Have you ever just let her not eat and see what happens?

Lots of questions- I'm sorry. If she doesn't have other feeding/swallowing issues, try to remember that no child will ever starve herself- eventually they will eat with out prompting. At this point, you might be setting yourself up for feeding issues by forcing her to eat and by making the whole meal thing a control issue.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

Vent away....It is hard...I feel your pain. DS is almost 16 months old and has been like this on and off since 9 months or so. He was eating table food at 9 months, but only if he was distracted and I let him feed himself. Then when he turned 1, he stopped eating all table food except cheerios and crackers. I spent hours trying to get him to eat....I was worried that he had to eat and I tried everything to get him to eat. I just got over that and now I don't fight it. If he doesn't eat breakfast then he waits for lunch. By then he is hungry and will eat. He is still on jarred foods, but at least it is something. He is only in the 25 percentile for weight too. The dr said as long as he is gaining weight he is fine. I don't think it is fine. I know he has texture issues and that is holding him back from eating most solids. Now I try to feed him once and if he fights me, he is done. The only meal I try really hard to get him to eat is dinner. Or he will wake up at 5am for a bottle..I have tried him with something new and he won't even touch it most of the time. I just got him to try a cereal bar and he actually liked it. He likes yogurt. Just offer her snacks throughout the day. I will usually let DS eat cheerios or crackers off our coffee table just to get something in to him....Everyone keeps telling me it is a phase, but this is different...I hope things get better for you and your DD. It is very hard to see them not eat....And it is so frustrating trying to get them to eat.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

Thanks!

Message edited 8/6/2011 8:44:05 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

I understand you are frustrated but I truly think you might want to back off a little and just see what happens. I had the same type of problem with DS around 12 months and my
ped said to back off of the "force-feeding". As AP said, it's more likely to set the precedent for eating to be a control issue and create larger issues down the road. Don't give her snacks between meals unless it's something healthy and if she doesn't eat when you first put her in the highchair, take her out and try again later (this was a really tough one for me). Also, I don't know how much milk you are giving her but we were told to cut back to no more that 16 ounces a day at that point.
DS is still not a great eater, but he gains steadily and has maintained 25th %ile for weight and 75th %ile for height at 19months....mostly I have learned that if he pushes the food away or throws a fit, he comes out of the chair and we move on. He's more verbal now so when he's hungry he'll say "eat" and I feed him something.

I just read your update and wanted to add that DS has done the not eating for a whole day thing for 2 days - then would make up for it by eating like a horse. What if you put her in the chair with the food and only give her a few pieces at a time, when she eats what is there add more. We had a problem with DS feeding the dog if we put too much on the tray so we learned that this trick worked better.

Message edited 2/20/2011 12:49:33 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

do you do set meal times? How about having little plates of bite size food around where she is playing. My daughter is a grazer. She will not sit and eat a meal per say but will take a bite or two here or there.

Maybe try that?

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

I've been getting a crash course in feeding therapy at work, so it's an interest of mine as of late.

What I've learned is that letting a child play with foods and giving them the option to eat (with no pressure) is best. That once it becomes a power struggle, it gets 10x harder. I swear this is why my first is so picky and my second eats like a champ. I do remember feeling stressed that DD#2 stopped drinking as much when we moved to sippies, But my ped said they need less after the first year because they don't grow as quickly as they did that first year.

If all she'll eat is a few bites, then make sure everything she gets is high in the fats and proteins she needs. Full fat cheese is good, so is avocado. I'd stop the all day grazing-it's stressful for you and might become a bad habit later.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

[Thanks!

Message edited 8/6/2011 8:44:26 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

[Thanks

Message edited 8/6/2011 8:44:42 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

Thanks

Message edited 8/6/2011 8:45:24 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

My friend who has a son who is 6 now but this is how he was since he was an infant. She brought him to at least 10 different doctors and they all told her it was nothing, to leave him and he would just eat eventually. Turns out he had a medical condition called Eosinophilic esophagitis (EE)

Not saying that your DD has this but if my friend had found this out early enough, she would have saved herself a lot of heartache.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

Is it possible she could have acid reflux? It popped into my head when you mentioned how small of a bottle she will drink before pushing it away. DS has reflux and is on meds and I would always know something was off with meds or we weren't ready to continue a medication wean when he would have such a tiny amount to drink. FWIW, he's not a great eater either - I understand the dog and pony show

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

Thx

Message edited 8/6/2011 8:45:45 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

Thx

Message edited 8/6/2011 8:46:06 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

[Thx

Message edited 8/6/2011 8:46:57 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

My pedi won't start to worry unless he starts to lose weight or he is still doing it at 18 months. At this point I am trying to not let it frustrate me. He picks up on it and it makes it worse. If I am relaxed and don't worry about it, then he seems to eat better. My hubby got him into a bad habit of letting him eat in front of the tv. Something I wanted to avoid, but it works sometimes and I just go with it. He likes to play with toys he can open and close. That works too...It is so hard. I was in tears. Maybe you can contact your insurance company and see if you can get a nutrionist to help out...

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

Posted by itsbabytime

Posted by Porrruss

I've been getting a crash course in feeding therapy at work, so it's an interest of mine as of late.

What I've learned is that letting a child play with foods and giving them the option to eat (with no pressure) is best. That once it becomes a power struggle, it gets 10x harder. I swear this is why my first is so picky and my second eats like a champ. I do remember feeling stressed that DD#2 stopped drinking as much when we moved to sippies, But my ped said they need less after the first year because they don't grow as quickly as they did that first year.

If all she'll eat is a few bites, then make sure everything she gets is high in the fats and proteins she needs. Full fat cheese is good, so is avocado. I'd stop the all day grazing-it's stressful for you and might become a bad habit later.

Thanks - I can use all the help I can get. There is no all day grazing. I feed her at 1.5-2 hr intervals - nothing in between b/c then I have found she will definitely not eat at all. If I just let her be and feed herself every meal will be a maximum of 4 bites.

Message edited 2/20/2011 3:29:22 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

I can only imagine how hard this must be. Sometimes I have to feed my DD while she's playing or in front of the TV, which I don't love and that's frustrating enough for me - but it's not every day so my heart goes out to you. My only suggestions, which you've probably already tried before, is to maybe try using a straw cup (no valve) - straws tend to get more liquid in faster. My dd really likes them and drinks more than from a sippy. I'd also try mum-mums or pretzel rods - because they can be held while playing or doing something else. DD eats them while distracted by other things, which might be useful in your situation. I wish I had more advice. I would also probably go to a GI just in case, to rule out anything weird and rare that might be behind this.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

My DD is 2 and could care less about food...You'd never know it from looking at her...

She'd live on milk and cheese alone if I let her...We too have to basically chase her around to get her to eat ...She has no texture or feeding issues, she just can't be bothered...Even the foods that used to be the "go to" foods don;t always work these days...I'm waiting for her to outgrow it- Ped is not concerned and she is a nice healthy size ...Good Luck

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

I have the same exact problem with my son who is 18 months old and the doctors would not take it seriously until he stopped gaining weight and actually started to lose. He has no feeding issues as far as chewing or swallowing, just did not show signs of hunger or any interest in eating at all. He sustained himself on pediasure alone for a long time. We are getting feeding therapy and nutritionist services through EI and have seen some improvement. It was hard to get the services and he only qualified because of his failure to thrive diagnosis, so if she is gaining weight, she may not qualify.

The doctors we saw in the past gave advice that was contradictory to the specialists and actually made things worse. My DS was put on a strict feeding schedule with specific times he can eat or drink and this is working a little better. He only gets 1/2 hour per meal and if he doesn't eat during that time frame, he gets nothing until the next meal. It took a while for this to work though and seemed to get worse before we saw improvements. He is now showing signs of hunger and actually asked me to eat for the first time in his life this week. He ate 1/2 a slice of pizza the other night for dinner, so there is hope for you too. We do have days, like today, where it is still a big struggle, but we are making progress.

If you want the name of the nutritionist i can give it to you. She sees patients privately and was able to help us after just one visit. Looking back, I wish I hadn't waited for EI and just paid out of pocket months ago.

Start keeping a very specific food log and write down exactly what she is eating and how much. Also record the times that she is eating.

Have you been to a GI doctor to rule out a medical problem. That was our first step and through extensive testing, nothing was found.

I know how stressful it is, but try not to let her sense your anxiety during meal times. Don't create battles over food or try to force feed, it will only create worse problems.

If you want any more advice or info, just ask

Message edited 2/20/2011 8:59:35 PM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

My friend's DD is 16mo and has had the same issues since about 4mo, as well. My DD had also come close to not eating at all at about 4mo...must be a common time for issues to creep up.
Both of our DD's are in feeding therapy. I am not sure of what my friend's DD has issues with, but my DD has some tongue pattern issues, oral sensitivity, trouble coordinating her suck/swallow/breathe patterns and severe reflux. In short, eating is difficult and unpleasant for her.

I would talk to your ped about getting an eval from a feeding specialist. We see a speech therapist (they typically focus on oral motor)...that is what I would suggest because they also know about the sensory piece. I have heard of some groups that use both SLPs and OTs as a team.

If you have any questions, feel free to FM.

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

my niece has never been an eater. My sister and mom (who takes care of her during hte day) leave little bowls and plates of food all over where she plays. Eventually she makes her way over there to eat, but she'd rather not be bothered!

Re: My DD doesn't want to eat ever and I am really on the verge of losing it.

Thanks

Message edited 8/6/2011 8:45:02 PM.