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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19458 total posts
Name:
L
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Tipping question
We are having my kids bar and bat mitzvah this month. We made the final payment today. The guy suggested we tip the master de $1000 cash. Is that standard these days?
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Posted 5/2/21 7:39 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
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BargainMama
LIF Adult
Member since 5/09 15657 total posts
Name:
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Tipping question
I'm just here for the responses. That seems like a lot to me. But I've never booked that kind of event.
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| Posted 5/2/21 8:29 PM |
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klingklang77
kraftwerk!
Member since 7/06 11487 total posts
Name:
Völlig losgelöst
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Re: Tipping question
Posted by BargainMama
I'm just here for the responses. That seems like a lot to me. But I've never booked that kind of event.
Me, too. I’m curious about the responses. That seems like a lot. If it is for the whole staff, then it seems ok. But if it’s just for him? Seems like a lot.
I also want to bet that the owner or manager or whatever is saying that to keep his good staff on because the restaurant industry suffered a lot. I would throw in extra for this reason, but 1000 seems like a lot.
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| Posted 5/2/21 8:37 PM |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7180 total posts
Name:
Katherine
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Tipping question
$1,000 tip?? Are they not getting paid by the venue? That seems crazy high.
I got married over 10 years ago but I think at that point the tip was $1-$2 per guest.
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| Posted 5/2/21 9:10 PM |
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seaside
LIF Adult
Member since 6/08 3101 total posts
Name:
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Re: Tipping question
Was this presented to you as customary and to be added onto expenses when you were first being sold the place? Or is it just being mentioned now that you're making the last payment?
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| Posted 5/2/21 9:11 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19458 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: Tipping question
It was mentioned to me during the final payment. Like it is standard to tip and my reply was okay, what do you suggest, and he was like $1000.
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| Posted 5/2/21 9:29 PM |
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BFNY516
LIF Adult
Member since 7/20 1189 total posts
Name:
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Tipping question
Someone grab me, I’m going to faint.
Unless MAYBE (BIG maybe) you spend like 20k on the event, $1000 is crazy in my opinion.
Edited to say that I’m not trying to be a stalker but I was curious and I saw the amount you mentioned per person for adult dinner. Maybe it’s on the mark then. But it still sounds like so much money to tip! 
Message edited 5/2/2021 9:50:33 PM.
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| Posted 5/2/21 9:43 PM |
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NervousNell
Just another chapter in life..
Member since 11/09 54921 total posts
Name:
..being a mommy and being a wife!
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Re: Tipping question
...quits job to pursue a career as a maitre'd...
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| Posted 5/2/21 9:49 PM |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7180 total posts
Name:
Katherine
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Re: Tipping question
Posted by NervousNell
...quits job to pursue a career as a maitre'd...
No joke!
2 events a week, $100K cash/yr!
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| Posted 5/2/21 9:55 PM |
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Momma2015
Mommax2
Member since 12/12 6656 total posts
Name:
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Re: Tipping question
Granted this was 11 years ago, but we didn't tip our maitre'd at our wedding that much. Not even close.
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| Posted 5/2/21 10:25 PM |
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LuckyStar
LIF Adult
Member since 7/14 7274 total posts
Name:
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Tipping question
I don’t remember what we tipped at our wedding (over 7 years ago) but it was a lot and bar mitzvahs are often as expensive, if not more expensive than many weddings so it doesn’t sound completely insane.
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| Posted 5/2/21 11:01 PM |
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KarenK122
The Journey is the Destination
Member since 5/05 4431 total posts
Name:
Karen
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Tipping question
I think it's 3 to 5 dollars per person to tip. So it depends on how many people you are having. But don't tip until the end of the night as at our wedding our maitre'd sucked and gave him $100. We split the rest to the wait staff who did terrific jobs.
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| Posted 5/2/21 11:17 PM |
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Katareen
5,000 Posts!
Member since 4/10 7180 total posts
Name:
Katherine
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Re: Tipping question
Posted by KarenK122
I think it's 3 to 5 dollars per person to tip. So it depends on how many people you are having. But don't tip until the end of the night as at our wedding our maitre'd sucked and gave him $100. We split the rest to the wait staff who did terrific jobs.
This is a good tidbit...maybe the suggested amount will be split among the entire wait staff?
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| Posted 5/3/21 12:38 PM |
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Mrs213
????????
Member since 2/09 18986 total posts
Name:
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Re: Tipping question
Posted by Momma2015
Granted this was 11 years ago, but we didn't tip our maitre'd at our wedding that much. Not even close.
Same I think it was like 400
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| Posted 5/3/21 1:12 AM |
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jellybean78
:)
Member since 8/06 13103 total posts
Name:
Mommy
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Tipping question
My wedding was 100 years ago so I don't remember what was customary but I want to say $1000 is very generous IMO however it depends on how many people you are having and how much pp you are paying. Example: If you are paying $100 pp and have 200 people then $1000 is around 5% and I would say that seems reasonable.
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| Posted 5/3/21 1:39 AM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19458 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: Tipping question
We had to slash the guest list so it is 60 people. Basically just my kids friends and some of their parents. I don’t mind sharing we are paying 145 per person. I do recall how awful the person was for my wedding. So I absolutely will wait until the end of the night. Thanks.
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| Posted 5/3/21 4:12 AM |
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mrsrainbow
LIF Adult
Member since 1/17 1465 total posts
Name:
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Re: Tipping question
They usually have a formula - somewhere between $2-$6pp - based on the number of guests. Or it could be a flat percentage of the total. It's always up to your discretion, but I would make sure to ask if it's just for the maitre;d or the staff as well? I knew a maitre'd who made a fortune in tips each season but he never shared with the staff (the place didn't make him, so he didn't.)
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| Posted 5/3/21 2:45 PM |
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mrsrainbow
LIF Adult
Member since 1/17 1465 total posts
Name:
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Re: Tipping question
Posted by LSP2005
We had to slash the guest list so it is 60 people. Basically just my kids friends and some of their parents. I don’t mind sharing we are paying 145 per person. I do recall how awful the person was for my wedding. So I absolutely will wait until the end of the night. Thanks.
For 60 people they suggested $1k? That's outrageous. I would check the contract fine print to see what it says about gratutites. I would suggest $500 and that's generous. From my math he's trying to get about 10% out of you.
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| Posted 5/3/21 2:47 PM |
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FirstMate
My lil cowboy
Member since 10/10 7790 total posts
Name:
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Re: Tipping question
For 60 people that sounds exorbitant. I remember for my wedding, they said $2-$4 a head. Even if you did $10/head, you would be at $600.
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| Posted 5/3/21 3:06 PM |
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tray831
Dee-licious!
Member since 3/06 5355 total posts
Name:
His Baby
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Re: Tipping question
Posted by FirstMate
For 60 people that sounds exorbitant. I remember for my wedding, they said $2-$4 a head. Even if you did $10/head, you would be at $600.
Exactly! And even that is extremely generous.
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| Posted 5/3/21 4:00 PM |
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nycbuslady
LIF Adult
Member since 9/15 1066 total posts
Name:
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Re: Tipping question
Posted by LSP2005
We had to slash the guest list so it is 60 people. Basically just my kids friends and some of their parents. I don’t mind sharing we are paying 145 per person. I do recall how awful the person was for my wedding. So I absolutely will wait until the end of the night. Thanks.
I know this may be nosy, but is the $145 pp including tax and gratuity, or is that added on top? The reason why I ask is that the last time I threw a big party was for my daughter's First Communion and that was $75 pp, plus tax and tip, which came to around $95 pp. She's almost 13 now and I'm am sure she is going to want a big Sweet 16 party. I'm just wondering what the going rate for big parties is these days.
Thanks!
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| Posted 5/3/21 4:06 PM |
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jlm2008
LIF Adult
Member since 1/10 5092 total posts
Name:
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Re: Tipping question
Posted by LSP2005
We had to slash the guest list so it is 60 people. Basically just my kids friends and some of their parents. I don’t mind sharing we are paying 145 per person. I do recall how awful the person was for my wedding. So I absolutely will wait until the end of the night. Thanks.
I was waiting to respond to see if you would post how much you paid and how many people........now that you did that is absolutely insane!!!!!!!!!!!! Does he not get a salary? If he doesn't , that is on the catering hall not you!!! I'd be so pissed that I'd give him $100 and not feel bad. On the other hand, maybe I should go back to being an event planner
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| Posted 5/3/21 6:38 PM |
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LSP2005
Bunny kisses are so cute!
Member since 5/05 19458 total posts
Name:
L
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Re: Tipping question
Posted by nycbuslady
Posted by LSP2005
We had to slash the guest list so it is 60 people. Basically just my kids friends and some of their parents. I don’t mind sharing we are paying 145 per person. I do recall how awful the person was for my wedding. So I absolutely will wait until the end of the night. Thanks.
I know this may be nosy, but is the $145 pp including tax and gratuity, or is that added on top? The reason why I ask is that the last time I threw a big party was for my daughter's First Communion and that was $75 pp, plus tax and tip, which came to around $95 pp. She's almost 13 now and I'm am sure she is going to want a big Sweet 16 party. I'm just wondering what the going rate for big parties is these days.
Thanks!
nope. 20%. We also had guaranteed a 100 person minimum when we booked this 4 years ago. They did let us postpone. The event was supposed to be last June. Obviously we had to reschedule that one. They are charging the children rate for 45 people even though we have 60 guests.
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| Posted 5/3/21 7:20 PM |
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