UPDATED: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

ok... so ILs are visiting from PA, and will be here till tuesday. DH and i went to the bon jovi concert last night, and they got here while we were out. thats fine, they have a key, let themselves in, no big deal.
DH and i didn't get back till like 1, and i was tired so i figured " i'm tired, its saturday, i'm gonna sleep in." WELL at 9:!5, the phone rings. half sleeping, i look at the caller ID and see its DHs uncle. before i could wake up enough to answer, DHs parents picked it up! W T F?? ILs both have cell phones! why is he calling OUR house for THEM at 9:15 on a saturday?! UGH!!!
THEN... DH and FIL are working on redoing one of our bathrooms. MIL is down there helping them clean up. She asked me for a couple small plastic grocery bags for trash. so i gave them to her. She needed some more, so i figured instead of giving her a ton of little bags, i'll just give her a couple big garbage bags. SO she takes the small bags full of trash and puts them into the big bags!! W T F is the point of that?? AND, when she did that, she poked a hole in the big bag... so she wasted one of my big bags for no reason! they're the expensive glad force flex, too!
GRRR!!! its only a few hours into their visit, and i already want my house back!!!!

UPDATE:

Posted by Reese32

I completely understand. We live in the house I grew up in, so when my parents or sister come to visit, they are "coming home." In other words, they don't act like guests.



YUP! i thats exactly it! we bought their house from them, so when they come to visit, its not like having "normal" guests... they feel like they are "coming home", and act like it. they are just a little TOO comfortable here. LOL
but you guys are right, it could be MUCH worse... and i know that. they really are nice, helpful, generous people. i think its just the whole situation of living in their old house that makes it more stressful when they come to visit... it adds a whole new dimension to it. so it tends to make the minor things even "worse". but, it'll all be over tuesday Chat Icon

Message edited 11/10/2007 3:19:27 PM.

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

it's only until Tuesday

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

Oh, darling - if that's it - NO need to worry!

Could be worse, I have BTDT. You have it easy my friend

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

Posted by BabyCote2006

Oh, darling - if that's it - NO need to worry!

Could be worse, I have BTDT. You have it easy my friend

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

Please know that I can TOTALLY relate about how stressful the ILs can be. I always dread it when my ILs visit as my MIL is a chatterbox and makes me nuts talking about NOTHING, while FIL is practically mute and the uncomfortable silences with him are almost unbearable. Because of that, I sometimes found myself getting annoyed at them for what seems like silly infractions.

That said, I also know they love DH, me and DC VERY much and that they mean well. They are VERY good to us- and I realize how lucky I am to have such loving ILs.

Rather than getting annoyed at them, realize that what you are complaining about it a little petty. I mean, she asked you for bags because she is cleaning up. Cleaning up the mess that was made because FIL is helping DH with renovations to your house.

It could be SO much worse- they could be vindictive, hateful people who truly make your life miserable.

Vent away, but understand that people are going to point out how bad you COULD have it.

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

Ok, I know how stressful in-laws can be, but at least they want to see you. My MIL has no interest in us or DS.

And I mean, it kind of makes sense for DH's uncle to call the house and I'm sorry, 9:15 isn't THAT early....and they are helping you with a major project that you would have to pay someone else to do, so I think you may have to suck it up

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

But think of the nice bathroom you'll have when they leave!! You MIL cleans....that's a step above mine

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

Tell them you're going out for a little bit. Go to Starbucks, hang out a little bit, bring them all back some coffee and try to take it easy!

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

You wanna trade?

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

Doesn't seem so bad to me. Count your blessings. It could be far, far worse.

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

I completely understand. We live in the house I grew up in, so when my parents or sister come to visit, they are "coming home." In other words, they don't act like guests. They phone rings all day for them, they invite their friends over (!) - although we put a stop to that after the last time. They always mean well, and are very helpful with things, but DH always feels like the outsider, and often feels displaced. Like when my mother went to put something away in what used to be a "catch-all" closet, but is now *DH's* closet. And she was surprised that things had been moved in the TEN years since she left.

I'm sure your ILs mean well, and I'm sure they're not trying to drive you nuts, it just happens. I've been there.

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

I am going to agree with those who said it could be worse.
I LOVE my inlaws, however, I see what my MOM goes through with my grandmother (Her MIL) and its getting worse.
Ok, Gram is 90, but, she's been this way for as long as I can remember.
She has some very nasty moments, always criticizing people, the way mom takes care of the house, etc.
Then she has her very, very LOVING moments!

She's getting on a plane Monday to go to CA for a few months and stay with my uncle. He's actually here now and is taking her back with him. My parents (especially my mom) need a break!
She's one of those that makes my mom feel she can't do anything right. Meanwhile, my mom is freakin' superwoman!!!

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

I think you are overreacting just a little bit. They are helping you out and what they did really wasn't bad. They probably answered the phone because they saw that it was your uncle and didn't want to wake you up.

You were so stressed about them coming in general, that now you are letting EVERYTHING stress you. Try not to let the little things bother you. You can't control everything.

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

Message edited 11/10/2007 3:19:46 PM.

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

Re: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

Re: UPDATED: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

BUMP for the update...

Re: UPDATED: sorry... need to vent about ILs, and i can't scream because they're here!

I know what you are going through, I've been through this before. My inlaws came for 3 weeks one time. I kept the liquor cabinet stocked.

Just try to relax, it's only til Tuesday, then you get your house back.