Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

My gorgeous miracle baby, my DS, is going to be 1 in a few weeks so I booked a cake smash for him back in November. I have been looking forward to this for months. I bought a cute little outfit off etsy, had a cake made, and used a photographer we had used previously. When we used her previously, we were really happy Well, the shoot was a complete disaster. He screamed the entire time. He was cold and scared and didn't want to let me go. I was sad he didn't want to cooperate, but my DH is pissed and thinks that it is partially the photographer's fault. I am not sure what I think. Yes, DS is going through a separation anxiety phase and yes, he was terrified of the balloons. However, when we arrived, the studio was FREEZING and there was no heater going. The photographer knew the outfit he was going to wear because we discussed it. Shouldn't she have made sure the studio was warm? She also did very little to engage him or make him happy. She just said peekaboo a few times and her assistant played some music for him. I would figure they were have some tricks or toys for these exact type of situations. We were also rushed because she booked someone an hour after us. We paid the money and left, but I am really upset. My DH thinks the photographer owes us something, but I am just not confrontational. What are your thoughts?

Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

Our cake smash was the same way and to no fault of the amazing photographer we used. I too had planned it for months, had a couple of outfits. The truth is that it's an entirely diff age than newborn pics, assuming that's the time you previously used the photog.

Did you feel rushed? That would be something that's the photographers fault, but how your ds reacted isn't.

Re: Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

Did you ask her to turn on the heater?
Did you book more than an hour shoot?
Did you bring some of his favorite toys yourself?


I am inclined to think that it was just a bad day for your son and that's unfortunately how things go with kids. If she spent less than the time you agreed to with her then I would say she owes you something, but if you didn't voice your complaints about the temperature at the time, there is not much you can do after the fact.

Re: Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

That stinks.
I'd retry the shoot yourselves. Dress up and have your DS in your lap.

At 1 yr, DS had horrible separation anxiety... No way did he leave my lap for anything. His christening (at 11 months) looked like an exorcism!

Only you will know if it was a bad day or improper conditions... Or a mix of both.

Re: Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

Did you get any pictures at all??

I would ask for a re-shoot and see what she says
There is no harm in asking

Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

Did the photographer think you got good shots? I would talk to her because I'm sure she wants to try and make you happy somehow.

Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

DD was a complete disaster the day of her photo shoot. I mean, she cried the second we stepped foot into the studio and pretty much throughout the entire session.

She would not sit without me, she would not smile, she would not look at the camera. She kept crawling off the mat towards me. We had to shoot the cake smash first hoping that the cake would calm her down. It helped a bit, but she was still very uncooperative. I kept asking the photographer if she felt she had some shots she could work with and she did.

I was very happy with what I was given in the end and actually surprised she was able to get as many as she did. Have you seen the pictures yet? I would wait until you get them before talking to her about it.

Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

First off im so sorry i totally know how disappointing that is.
Should she have raised the heat? Yes
Should she have tried a lil harder to make him laugh? Sure
should she have rushed you? No but it soesnt sound like she rushed you. you said you were there for an hour. To be honest thats a looooong time for a child whose clearly upset to sit. And thats the usual time for a photographer. They book 1 hour sessions and back to back. She has the right to do that. Its a 1 hour session no matter the mood of your child sadly.
But
1 years old is very different than newborn photos. Some photogs are amazing newborn photographers, but do not do as amazing with older babies or toddlers or family shots.
2nd it sounds like sadly your son was having a bad day, add in he may have been cold and hes going through separation anxiety.

Personally i would wait to see the pics. She may have gotten a couple of good shots and thats all you really need.
I had 2 instances of this. 1 my dd cake smash didnt turn out exactly as I wanted. She just didnt want to eat the cake. She didnt want to sit. She was a tiny bit cranky but not bad just being a 1 year old. Wanting to stand up and play. But my photog was able to get some great shots.
Her xmas photos this past year was a miz disaster. She woke up that day with a runny nose. We were doing the shoot outside in november, it was cold that day. I had her in layers but not the actual outfit she was going to wear for her shoot. So of course she spills her water all over herself in the car seat so i couldnt layer her outside her undershirts were soaked. So she was cranky because she was getting sick, cold because all she had on was a sweater with no undershirt and was going through some sudden separation anxiety with me (shes 2.5)... like i couldnt stand near her without her attaching herself to my leg or wanting me to pick her up.
My photog was amazing she tries everything. I even took some photos with her to show her it was ok. She evenually calmed down enough where we got a few good shots and again thats all i needed. As long as i got pics for the card i was happy.
Everyone loved the card and had no idea she was so miz.
I wasnt absolutely in love with her photos but i got what i needed. And it was not my photogs fault.

Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

Same thing happened with one of my twins at their first birthday shoot. She was not having it. The pictures we did get she was crying. Now she is 3 and loves looking at her cake smash pictures, and laughs at her self saying she did not want cake that day. I agree with the heat situation but I think he was just not having it that day. Maybe you can call her and say you were not happy and she will let you come in for a mini session to try again. If you have used her before I am sure she would hate to lose a repeat customer. I know how frustrating it can be to have a screaming child at a photoshoot. Now at 3 my daughters love going and pose for the camera. It is a HUGE difference from that 1 year shoot.

Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

Im sorry this happened to you. Have you considered having a photographer come to your home, where you can control the environment and DC would feel less afraid as he/she will know where they are?

Message edited 3/31/2015 8:54:01 AM.

Re: Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

I'm sorry you're disappointed
I agree, the studio should not have been freezing cold, particularly with a baby coming in for a shoot.
However, you can't really blame/rely on the pohtographer to engage your child if he was just unhappy and didn't want to leave you. She's a photographer, not God.
I'm sure by now you know, when a toddler is in a mood .......well, you just have to ride it out.

Do you have a decent camera? Or have a friend with one?
To be honest with you, a lot of these photographers are just taking pics and editing .........I did 'cake smash' photos - but I did them myself.
I made a giant cupcake, put them in a diaper on the floor on a huge sheet in my breezeway which happens to be painted a really fun green .......and just let them go to town while I shot.
Did I get 150 AMAZING pictures? No, of course not. But I DID get 2 or 3 really great ones .......for the price of a box of duncan hines.
Try it, you might be really pleasantly surprised.

Message edited 3/31/2015 9:04:26 AM.

Re: Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

Thanks ladies! I think it was a combination of bad planning on her part and my son's seperation anxiety. We did mention to her several times that it was cold, but you are right, there is nothing she could have done about his anxiety. I will wait and see how the pictures turn out and then go from there.

Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

i agree, a lot of these photogs have some nice backgrounds, a few props, and editing.

We did out our 1 year pics..
maybe try to do something on your own or with a friend's camera and save the pics with the photog for posterity

Re: Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

I would send her an email for sure. Just say that you were disappointed that things didn't go smoothly and that it felt really rushed. Ask her if she would be open to a reshoot. I wouldn't pay again, but if she does the reshoot I would probably tip.

Re: Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

Yea I've heard of plenty professional photographer do re shoots because the child had a bad day , I'd ask

Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

I think a lot of it has to do with the age, my DS was not into his cake smash, hated the cake part and cried a lot in front of the camera. The photographer still got cute shots, only one of him *sort of* smiling but again I think it is the age.

Re: Vent- I'm pretty disappointed and need opinions

I would have said something at the time if i didnt get any good shots... so chances are youd already know.

And its also why i do a clean shoot and a smash shoot... if the kid hates cake then at least the clean ones will be good.

I also have heaters running for cake smash. I learned with Haileys, she was all red and blotchy cause she was cold and half naked.