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Very sad to be here
I guess I just need some support right now. I found out yesterday that at 6 weeks 1 day I have had a missed miscarriage (no sac and low hcg). I am so upset and feel like a dream come true was taken away from me in a moment. I stopped nursing my son in July in order to get pregnant and that was very hard for the both of us. When I became pregnant a just knew I had made the right decision and there were so many signs leading up to this pregnancy. My son will be two at the end of the month and I was so excited to break the news to family and friends at that time. The thought of being pregnant for the holidays and giving my son a sibling made me happier than I can express I words. The funny thing is I was very nervous about my first sono. I just didn’t feel pregnant and if anything I felt like some of my symptoms disappeared. I don’t remember having these feeling with my son. I guess my gut instinct was correct. I go back to the doctor but I was just wondering what is next for me??? I want to speed this whole process along so I can move on from this. I am so sad right now I just feel like I have no motivation to do anything and even putting on a happy face for my son is hard (but I am). I feel like I am not going to be happy until I become pregnant again and even that will be scary. I also know this is not possible but there is a part of me that is hoping for some 1 in a million miracle tomorrow at the doctor. I have a strong faith and know that life goes on and I am not the only one. I know it is in Gods hands and this time is just wasn’t meant to be. I guess its just really hard to let go of a dream that had so many chapters ahead to look forward to. I know God doesn’t ever give you more than you can handle but I never thought I would be able to handle something like this and now I have no choice. I feel so bad for all of the girls on here that have went through this and even more. I am so grateful for my son but this is still so hard. I guess thanks for letting me vent and any advice on what’s next would be appreciated
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Posted 9/7/11 2:08 PM |
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Megs4
LIF Adult
Member since 11/08 1619 total posts
Name: Megan
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Re: Very sad to be here
I am so very sorry for your loss.
I also had a missed miscarriage (at 10 weeks) and also felt something was wrong when my symptoms went away. While it spared me from being totally shocked when I got the bad news, it didn't lessen the pain at all.
Only time makes it easier to deal with, and two and a half months out I still have some really bad days.
Talk with your doctor about the next steps and hopefully you can start trying again soon.
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Posted 9/7/11 2:15 PM |
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Re: Very sad to be here
Posted by Megs4
I am so very sorry for your loss.
I also had a missed miscarriage (at 10 weeks) and also felt something was wrong when my symptoms went away. While it spared me from being totally shocked when I got the bad news, it didn't lessen the pain at all.
Only time makes it easier to deal with, and two and a half months out I still have some really bad days.
Talk with your doctor about the next steps and hopefully you can start trying again soon.
Thanks for your response. It is so nice to have someone to relate to. I was scared somethign was wrong but then would go online and google for hours just to make myself feel better. Regardless..in the end I guess I wasn't shocked just devasted. I guess it will get easier as the day go on....I hope are on the road to another BFP
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Posted 9/7/11 2:21 PM |
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remyc
LIF Toddler
Member since 3/09 420 total posts
Name: claire
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Re: Very sad to be here
I'm so sorry. I remember following your posts when I was pregnant with ds. You describe perfectly how it feels, like those chapters you were already filling up and now there just taken away. I can tell you it does get easier I now Really want and look forward to being pregnant again even though it will be scary. My missed mc was in April and I had a dc which was the easiest part of the whole ordeal. Many hugs to you I hope you feel better soon.
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Posted 9/7/11 4:19 PM |
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StaceyWill
It's a girl!!!
Member since 6/10 21539 total posts
Name: Stacey
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Re: Very sad to be here
I'm so sorry
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Posted 9/7/11 4:19 PM |
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MrsKelly
just hangin' around...
Member since 11/06 6305 total posts
Name: Krista
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Re: Very sad to be here
Posted by MrsNicolaxoxo
I am so upset and feel like a dream come true was taken away from me in a moment. with my son. I guess its just really hard to let go of a dream that had so many chapters ahead to look forward to.
this is exactly how i felt, how i still feel.
i am so sorry that you have to endure this i know firsthand that nothing anyone says or does, will make this better. i found out i miscarried at my 9 week, 1 day sono - there was no heartbeat and the baby had only stopped growing a day or two prior. i had no symptoms of miscarriage at all - and while i was deathly afraid of this nightmare, and knew the possibility - i was completely blindsided and feel like my whole life was ripped apart in one single moment. my d&c was 5 weeks ago, this friday. i am still very depressed, i still cry, and i still feel like i won't be myself again until i am pregnant again. but the pain does get easier to handle in time. you just have to do your best to hang in there. the only peace i felt was in talking to woman who had been through the same thing as me. so i hope you can find th support you need here.
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Posted 9/7/11 4:25 PM |
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beachgirl
LIF Adult
Member since 7/05 7967 total posts
Name: sara
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Re: Very sad to be here
I am so sorry for your loss. I had a missed miscarriage at 10 weeks and it brought me to my knees I had to wean my nearly 2 year old the weekend I found out as I had to have a D&C so I had huge emotions to deal with.
Its a huge process and I dont have a full handle on it yet but I guess its day by day.
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Posted 9/7/11 7:26 PM |
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Re: Very sad to be here
Thanks for your words of encouragement and support. I keep reading your responses over and over and even my original post again and again and in some weird way it helps me through this. I'm anxious to get to the doctor tomorrow. It is very hard being in this in-bewtween state physically and emotionally. I will say many prayers for all of us
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Posted 9/7/11 7:46 PM |
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CallaLily
Thank you, Saint Gerard!
Member since 10/07 4937 total posts
Name:
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Re: Very sad to be here
I am so very sorry for your loss
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Posted 9/7/11 8:33 PM |
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prunepie
LIF Adult
Member since 7/06 4357 total posts
Name: jennifer
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Re: Very sad to be here
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Posted 9/7/11 9:01 PM |
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Jax430
Hi!
Member since 5/05 18919 total posts
Name: Jackie
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Re: Very sad to be here
I'm so sorry. As someone who has had several early losses, I know how even at the very start, you start planning the future and having all these hopes and dreams for your little one. It just isn't fair. I'm so sorry.
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Posted 9/7/11 9:07 PM |
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Pomegranate5
LIF Adult
Member since 2/11 4798 total posts
Name: Pomegranate5
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Re: Very sad to be here
I'm so sorry for your loss
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Posted 9/8/11 9:41 AM |
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bride07
Ava Rose you are an angel!!!
Member since 3/09 6115 total posts
Name:
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Re: Very sad to be here
I am sorry for your loss!!
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Posted 9/8/11 7:53 PM |
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MrsM429
Mama x2 <3
Member since 12/10 4946 total posts
Name:
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Re: Very sad to be here
i'm sorry for your loss
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Posted 9/8/11 10:33 PM |
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Chai77
Brighter days ahead
Member since 4/07 7364 total posts
Name:
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Re: Very sad to be here
I understand the loss and devastation you feel. I am so very sorry you have to go through this. In my experience, the pain does lessen in time, though you never forget.
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Posted 9/9/11 7:50 AM |
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MrsKS
Thank You St. Gerard.....
Member since 12/09 8306 total posts
Name: Kerri
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Re: Very sad to be here
I am so sorry for what you are going though.
It's always sad to get a new member on this board.
I had a missed miscarriage at around 10 or 11 weeks. For me though, my symptoms didn't disappear at all. Which really just made the whole ordeal seem more shocking to me. I did have a bad feeling... like something is wrong.. but since I never bled and I still had all my symptoms I convinced myself that all was fine. The shock of the miscarriage (from believing I was fine since the hardcore signs weren't saying otherwise even though my emotional feelings were there internally telling me something isn't right) made me feel so unsafe for any future pregnancy. Like anything can go wrong at any minute and I could have NO CLUE!! It was A LOT to deal with and really added to my stress and anxiety levels!!!
Eventually I did go on to have a beautiful happy baby girl (who is 10 weeks old now) It took a DNC and 9 + months of trying after the mc. But it was all worth it in the end. Had I not had that MC I wouldn't have the EXACT baby I have today... and that in itself touches me so much... really makes me feel like things do happen for a reason.. even if you don't know the reason at the time. Hindsight can be a wonderful thing!! So please don't think any changes you made thus far have been for nothing. You don't know what tomorrow brings.. even though your tomorrow seems grimm now, things do get better. I promise.
Message edited 9/9/2011 5:26:40 PM.
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Posted 9/9/11 5:19 PM |
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Re: Very sad to be here
MrsKS. Thank u for your encouraging words. It is stories like yours that keep me going right now. I loved what u said about not having the exact baby u have right now... It's so true. Even the months I was ttc with my son I would have never traded my bfp for an earlier one bc he is my angel and it just all made sense when he came into my life. Im just hoping tomorrow's doc appt sets me up with a plan so I can move on from this.
Thanks everyone else as well
Message edited 9/9/2011 8:50:43 PM.
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Posted 9/9/11 8:47 PM |
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