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CAJ
woulda, coulda, shoulda
Member since 12/05 3366 total posts
Name: CJ
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Wal-Mart joke
One day, in line at the company cafeteria, Jack says to Mike behind him,"My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I better see a doctor."
"Listen, you don't have to spend that kind of money," Mike replies. "There's a diagnostic computer down at Wal-Mart. Just give a urine sample and the computer will tell you what's wrong and what to do about it. It takes ten seconds and costs ten dollars...a lot cheaper than a doctor."
So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Wal-Mart. He deposits ten dollars, and the computer lights up and asks for the urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a printout... You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will improve in two weeks.
That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was, Jack began wondering if the computer could be fooled.
He mixed some tap water, a stool sample from his dog, urine samples from his wife and daughter and masturbated into the mixture for good measure.
Jack hurries back to Wal-Mart, eager to check the results. He deposits ten dollars, pours in his concoction, and awaits the results.
The computer Prints the following:
1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.
2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.
4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5. If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get better.
Thank you for shopping at Wal-Mart
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Posted 3/22/06 2:47 PM |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
MelToddJulia
Love my Family!
Member since 7/05 29064 total posts
Name: Mel
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
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Posted 3/22/06 2:52 PM |
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DebG
Pick a cause & stand up for it
Member since 5/05 18602 total posts
Name: The cure IS worse!
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
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Posted 3/22/06 2:58 PM |
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Jesaroo
is not the girl you knew
Member since 5/05 14266 total posts
Name: Jes
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
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Posted 3/22/06 3:00 PM |
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sunny
Life is good!
Member since 5/05 8369 total posts
Name: Stephanie
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
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Posted 3/22/06 3:01 PM |
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Kirsten
LIF Toddler
Member since 5/05 485 total posts
Name: Kirsten
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
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Posted 3/22/06 3:04 PM |
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Daveswife
I'm all grown up now
Member since 11/05 1108 total posts
Name: Valerie
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
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Posted 3/22/06 3:06 PM |
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Lisa
I'm a PANK!!!
Member since 5/05 22334 total posts
Name: Professional Aunts No Kids
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
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Posted 3/22/06 3:34 PM |
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Karen
Just chillin'!!
Member since 1/06 9690 total posts
Name: Karen
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
love it!!!!
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Posted 3/22/06 3:43 PM |
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SoinLove
Making big changes
Member since 5/05 16541 total posts
Name: Kristin
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
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Posted 3/22/06 3:44 PM |
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Re: Wal-Mart joke
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Posted 3/22/06 4:27 PM |
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