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Kara
Now Zagat Rated!
Member since 3/07 13217 total posts
Name:
They call me "Tater Salad"
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
No.
It *might* be different if the couple didn't know we were together, but then we wouldn't know each other that well anyway - and I wouldn't feel bad not going.
We're getting married in 2.5 months - I sure wouldn't go to anyone's wedding that didn't invite either one of us with the other.
I also just think it's rude to invite adult guests without dates. JMHO - I know some people disagree.
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Posted 5/17/07 1:24 PM  |
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Long Island Weddings
Long Island's Largest Bridal Resource |
mka06
LIF Adult
Member since 8/06 1079 total posts
Name:
Melis
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
If someone didn't invite my husband - I absolutely wouldn't go. When I was single, I would have. The only time I'd have been upset would be if it was someone who knew us both and knew we were serious/engaged. I went to many a wedding solo even when I was dating someone pretty seriously. I was never mad about it.
At our wedding, I invited everyone with a SO with a guest. But, I didn't invite singles with one. I spoke to each of them and explained that we had space limitations at our venue. I also made sure that seating arrangements were comfortable in terms of them being placed with people they knew and other singles they knew. When we got no's - I then offered to them to bring a guest if they wanted.
IMO - it is nice to be able to do it if you can. It's not a requirement. Weddings are really expensive and with large families can be hard to keep the guest list down. If you know a lot of single people it can add up really quickly.
ETA: If one of the singles I invited chose not to come bc they didn't get to bring a guest (who would have just been a date for the night - bc i invited everyone that was actually dating someone with a guest), i wuold have been fine with that. but - i also think it sends a clear signal that you don't really want to be part of a big event in someone's life. i think it's pretty selfish given that when ppl don't invite ppl with guests it is bc there are money or space limitations - not bc they are trying to offend.
Message edited 5/17/2007 1:46:50 PM.
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| Posted 5/17/07 1:28 PM |
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TheWhiteRabbit
Thru the rabbit hole!
Member since 7/06 4412 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
Message edited 9/17/2013 1:16:30 PM.
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| Posted 5/17/07 1:31 PM |
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MsMBV
:P
Member since 5/05 28602 total posts
Name:
Me
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
Posted by Christine
Probably not. If the person was not close enough to me to even consider inviting my SO when they knew I had one, then I wouldn't feel so obligated to go to the wedding.
ETA -- if the SO is my husband, then no I wouldn't go. My original answer was based on the guest not being married.
ita
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| Posted 5/17/07 1:33 PM |
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dpli
Daylight savings :)
Member since 5/05 13973 total posts
Name:
D
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
Posted by BabyAvocado
I might go without my SO, depending on who was getting married (close family, close friend, etc) and I would not be offended, especially if I had not been dating my SO for very long and the couple did not know my SO.
When I started dating my DH, I was a BM in my cousin's wedding. She did not invite my DH (then BF) and neither he or I expected her to, even though we had been dating for almost 1 year at that point. She didn't know him.
I know I'm in the minority but IMO, the couple getting married is spending alot of money per person and I can completely understand if they want/need to limit it to people they know well or are close to. I think the "and guest" courtesy is just that - a courtesy, not a requirement.
ETA: I also would not put the bride and groom on the spot by calling them and asking them if there was a mistake.
I agree. I would never invite a person without a spouse, but for me a SO is different. I did not invite every single person to my wedding with a guest, but I did invite people with a SO if they were living together or were in a long term relationship (that person was named on the invite, not just " and guest")
I also invited people with guests if they weren't going to know anyone else at the wedding. I didn't want them not to come because it would have been awkward to come alone. But inviting single family members or close friends who weren't seriously dating anyone and who knew plenty of other guests at the wedding was too expensive for us.
ETA - my situation might be different, because we didn't have anyone at our wedding that we didn't know.
Message edited 5/17/2007 2:09:28 PM.
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| Posted 5/17/07 1:57 PM |
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Boobobunny
Live in the Present
Member since 5/05 3572 total posts
Name:
Dannielle
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
it all depends...if SO has only been in the picture for a short while, then no I wouldn't expect him to be invited. However I would think it strange to invite an adult to a wedding without adding an "AND GUEST" to an invite.
If SO has been around for 6 or more months then he/she should be invited.
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| Posted 5/17/07 1:59 PM |
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J9-13
We're gonna be big sisters!
Member since 6/06 14887 total posts
Name:
J9
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
NO. I wouldn't go. They should give you the option to decide whether or not you want to bring your SO. Regardless of them never meeting. The only people at my wedding who weren't invited with a guest were my teenage cousins who did not have boyfriends or girlfriends.
JMO
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| Posted 5/17/07 2:01 PM |
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IrishTracy
Believe!!
Member since 5/05 15167 total posts
Name:
Tracy
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
My husband got invited to a wedding when we first started dating & told them he would only go if I was invited. They didn't even know I exisisted. So, the bride to be said I will invite her if I get to meet her first. So, we went out for dinner a month before the wedding.
ETA: I was invited to a wedding around the same time & my girlfriend made me promise that I was going w. a REAL boyfirend & not just some date. Her wedding was VERY pricey & she didn't want to pay over $250 on a plate of somebody that she doesn't know or that will never see again
Message edited 5/17/2007 2:09:50 PM.
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| Posted 5/17/07 2:07 PM |
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eroxgirl
My Loves
Member since 5/05 15697 total posts
Name:
Rebecca
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
Probably not, unless I knew several other people attending. I once went to a wedding where I wasn't invited with a guest and the only reason I didn't hate it was because I had a friend at the wedding that I could dance with. Generally, if I have no one to dance with at a wedding I'm not having fun.
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| Posted 5/17/07 2:10 PM |
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JandJ1224
Member since 6/06 5911 total posts
Name:
Jannette
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
I have been two 2 weddings without my DH. Not because he wasn't invited, but because of other circumstances that prevented him from attending with me.
We personally did not invite anyone with "and guest". If I knew your SO name that was placed on the invite, if not you were invited solo. Thats what we wanted. I was not up for paying x amount of dollars for someone to bring a random date to my wedding.
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| Posted 5/17/07 2:22 PM |
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~Colleen~
my loves...
Member since 5/05 9129 total posts
Name:
guess
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
Posted by Christine
Probably not. If the person was not close enough to me to even consider inviting my SO when they knew I had one, then I wouldn't feel so obligated to go to the wedding.
ETA -- if the SO is my husband, then no I wouldn't go. My original answer was based on the guest not being married.
Totally agree.
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| Posted 5/17/07 2:36 PM |
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mitabtrfly
Member since 12/06 2770 total posts
Name:
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
No, I wouldn't go.
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| Posted 5/17/07 2:38 PM |
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alnem
This is gonna be a good year!
Member since 2/06 9562 total posts
Name:
Emily
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
Posted by DanaRenee
I think it depends who was getting married and how long I've been dating my S.O.
yea thats what i was thinking. if i'd only been with my SO a few months and the couple getting married never met or only briefly met my SO then i wouldnt be shocked. but at the same time, i wouldnt go if i couldnt bring him.
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| Posted 5/17/07 2:51 PM |
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LightUpOurLife
Totally in love
Member since 8/06 12785 total posts
Name:
Bonnie-Jean
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
OK, I didn't read any of the other posts, but we did this at our wedding......
Single people invited solo
Dating couples invited w/ guest
We know all the people we invited so we know if they are dating or not. Just because we don't know the person they are dating, they still are welcome.
I've gone to a wedding solo and it is NOT fun.
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| Posted 5/17/07 3:21 PM |
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munchkinbugs
My little loves!
Member since 1/06 8093 total posts
Name:
Lisa
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
No...especially if we had been dating a while.
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| Posted 5/17/07 4:06 PM |
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MrsT
Enjoying wedded bliss.....
Member since 4/06 1323 total posts
Name:
Katrina
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Re: Wedding Quasi-Related: "and" guest
Depends on the situation. We did not invite everyone with a guest to our wedding and every single person knew a few people at the wedding plus the two of us. If they were dating someone then we put their guests name on the invite but if not we did not want anyone feeling obligated to "find" a date.
I agree that "and guest" is just a courtesy.
I also have to add that we did not invite the spouse of one guests since DH hates her and has for years. She did not expect to be invited and said as much before the invites went out. Many of his family members cannot stand her either and it was just best that she not attend.
Message edited 5/17/2007 8:04:05 PM.
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| Posted 5/17/07 8:02 PM |
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