What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

one of the things I dread most is choosing Godparents.

what to you guys is/was the most important deciding factor(s) in who you chose?

was it important to you to chose couples?

did you split it up?

did parenting style come into play?

TIA

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

We decided to choose DH's sister and husband. It was really important to us that they go to church, are religious and really try to live a christian life. It was easier to choose for the first baby, the next one might be an issue lol.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

My choice for Godmother is obvious, because I only have one sister and she is my best friend.

Godfather is a little more difficult, because DH has 2 brothers and neither one of them has made their confirmation. We made the agreement that if it's a boy it will be Mike, if it's agirl it will be Matt. Then that brother will have to take the class, make their confirmation and will be Godfather.

ETA: None of them are parents yet, so that did not matter.

Message edited 8/12/2009 12:27:01 PM.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

We will most likely always have separate Godparents.

Jack's are my cousin (She is like a sister to me, was my MOH etc) and my BIL (DH's brother)

This baby's Godmother is my other cousin (who I am also extremely close with) -- we have no idea who the Godfather will be. DH has another brother but neither of us are thrilled with that choice - but, I do have a feeling he will end up choosing him out of obligation.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

We picked my DH's brother as the Godfather & my SIL (brother's wife) as the Godmother.

My DH is very close with his brother & we know what an honor this is for all of us. My SIL is also very close to me, even though we live so far apart. We have yet to ask them & I think she is going to be shocked bc she thought I was picking my other SIL.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

We will decide based on if they are a good role model for my DS. We are not extremely religious, but they have to be people that my child can look up to.

Parenting style doesn't come into play at all since they aren't the legal gaurdian of the child.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

Don't even get me started on godparents

My mother is being very pushy about me asking my brother. However, my brother does not go to church, not even sure believes in God, and likes christmas only because there are presents

We dont speak to DH's parents and I refuse to ask his sister (who is religious) because of her playing both sides. . .

There are one or two of my friends who I could ask - one does not go to church but is more spiritual which I'm willing to compromise on and the other one is not a huge baby fan However if I picked one of them, I'd still be left with the problem of a Godfather.

DH's best friend is Jewish. His other good friend and his wife live in Indiana and are working on a limited budget and would not be able to come for the christening.

I think we have finally settled on DHs cousins who have four children and are excellent parents. That being said, they have not baptized any of their children and are not into the whole "organized" religion thing. The long and short of it is that My will love seeing them and all his cousins (the little on will only be 1 1/2 yrs older than ours). They are financially responsbile, we LIKE them, and they are spiritual and believe in God and Jesus (in their own way).

Now all of this is well and good but if they did not baptise their own kids isnt there a good chance they could say no?

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

Our preference for godparents was to choose family, but they do not have to be a couple.

I have 2 sisters and DH has 4 sisters and we have no brothers between us!

We are close with all 6 sisters and any of them would make an excellent godmother.

However, we are choosing my younger sister to be the godmother. One of the reasons is that I really wanted one godparent to be from my family and there are literally no potential godfathers (neither sister is married). Also, we have 6 nieces and nephews on DH's side so every one of his sisters already is a godmother!

3 of DH's sisters are married and we are extremely fortunate that any of them would be an excellent godfather. We are choosing the one that DH has known the longest.

I also should add that the godfather goes to church weekly and the godmother goes semi-regularly (though she is not the same religion as the baby will be).

We have not asked yet (though my sister already refers to herself as the godmother!) and won't until after the birth.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

what to you guys is/was the most important deciding factor(s) in who you chose? Must be a practicing Catholic who attends church and will teach DC about God, be a good example

was it important to you to chose couples? no

did you split it up? yes

did parenting style come into play? not really, we would choose someone who was single or had no children. I was single/childless when chosen to be Godparent to my nieces and nephews. It is more important that the person we choose practices and believes in the faith that we wish to raise our DC in-the whole point of a Godparent

Message edited 8/12/2009 1:34:52 PM.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

Message edited 1/17/2012 10:51:00 AM.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

We split it up, this time I was able to pick the godmother and I chose my sister...he was picking the godfather and chose his bestman. God willing the next time around he will pick the godmother and I will pick the godfather.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

oh geez...I don't know what to do this time around

with josh, I went for my closest in age sister, who is also a nun. she's a great godmother, she did not always like me, I was hesistant...but really loves Josh.

godfather...leo's only brother. This hurt. I don't agree with most of his moral character. but I wanted to be fair...Leo isn't a fan of catholics and I loved that he did not put up a baptizing fight.

this one...hmmm..
my next sister in line is not christian at all. she lives off in a rainforest with her family. so she's out.

the next one I am super close with, she is my cousin's godmother...
the next one isn't as into being an aunt as my super close sister...no god kids...she would take it personally if I left her out.

then I have a BFF cousin. who is really good to Josh. talk all the time. She has no sisters. I would make it her, she goes to church...but so do my sisters.

godfather...leaning towards leo's high school friend. catholic. very good to us. comes up from FL, helps us move...sends things to josh. my brothers are going to be shocked, but I want leo to feel included...

so, catholic is a plus...will accept christian as long as they aren't catholic haters...
the amount they pay attention to my current kid. some of my siblings had really great godparents, others had deadbeats..its does make a special difference.
one from mine, one from his.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

first baby, the choice was easy, my sister and BIL

this baby, I have no idea....I cringe at the thought of picking my SIL, she is OUT

Dh has another brother and his wife but they are "iffy"

I really have no idea what we are going to do

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

In choosing the godparents for my 1st DD - we wanted someone who would be a part of their lives. I chose a good friend of mine, and DH chose his brother. At the time they seemed like great choices, until the GM has basically had no part of her aside from sending her gifts for xmas etc. DD doesn't even know who she is. DD#1 was her first Goddaughter and she seemed so honored, but hasn't even attempted to form a relationship with her and I'm a little hurt over it. I've tried to no end to get together with her since she also had a baby...but no luck - always some excuse. BIL - up and moved to Florida - so she doesn't really know him but when she sees him she seems to remember.

For DD#2 I chose another friend of mine who was married to DH's cousin. I am VERY close to her and DD#1 LOVES her tremendously! She's always around and looks for DD#1. DH chose his brother again - which I was fine with even though there's the distance.

So to answer your question, we decided to choose someone who we hope would actually BE a part of their lives.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

We wanted a couple, but most importantly we wanted Godparents who go to church and understand and follow the religion. As of right now the Godfather is going to be my BIL. My sister has promised to make her sacraments and join her local parish this Fall. If she follows through, then she will be the Godmother. Otherwise, we will just have one Godparent.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

It was easy for us - he only has a sister and I only have a brother. No brainer.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

i had it pretty easy b/c the godfather is my brother, and godmother is DH's sister. both are not married (yet).

My brother was very active in the church when we were younger, and i wouldn't have thought to have anyone else be it..we're pretty tight. I didn't want to go the route of friends b/c i've seen what happens when god parents aren't friends with your parents anymore. So i wanted to keep it in the family first.

DH wasn't too sure about his sister b/c although she's 28, shes not settled down yet..always traveling abroad for schooling or some other adventure, still kind of selfish, is always fighting with their mom, and they're not terribly close. I will say though that since being with her current boyfriend now for a while she's changed a lot for the better and we hope she gets engaged b/c BF is a pretty good guy.

that said, my preference would be to keep it in the family first just from experience with my own godparents and brother's godparents, etc.

DH is godfather to his friend's son. I wasnt included in that..so the couple thing really doesnt bother me.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

This is going to be tough for us.
We have 4 brothers between the both of us and we barely have any female relatives (that would even be worth considering)

I told DH i will pick the Godfather and he can pick the Godmother since he has more of a female selection.

Most likely it will be my younger Brother and one of his cousins (who i'm certainly NOT a fan of, but whatever)

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

I am not really into organized religion, but I will have our baby baptized in order to avoid my poor MIL having a heart attack.

We are going to ask DH's sister who we are both close to. Her DH is not Catholic, so we can't do a couple. We are leaning towards asking my brother, who is super religious. I am not really that close to him, but I don't want my family to feel slighted...

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

This time is a Breeze i have one sibling and so does DH I have a brother and DH has a sister..so it worked out this time.. Next time I DONT KNOW.. its gonna be hard..

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

I can see this being a problem for us b/c both DH and I only have 1 sister, so who do we choose as Godmother. Neither of them are married or have children, and neither are super religious.

I of course want my sister b/c we are so close, but I feel bad for DH's sister b/c she's older and not married, it's going to be tough!

Neither of us have brothers or close male cousins so Godfather will have to be a close friend. Only DH's close male friends have children, none of mine do

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

DH & I are having a reallllly hard time.

I have two younger sisters, although I am close with them, we do not agree on a lot of things (life wise) I am not a fan of my sisters FH, I really dont know what to do

as far as the godfather - even worse - we have no males in our family, well i have my cousin who is 15, which i think is a bit young. and we do not want to choose friends.

i have noooo idea what to do.

Re: What criteria did you use for choosing Godparents?

we are choosing my brother and sister (obviously not a couple) and they are both younger than me, so no kids for them yet. I know that they have teh same values as I do being raised in the same family and for the next baby I would like to choose my cousin for the same reason, DH wants to choose his 2 cousins for the next baby, all they all have great values and beliefs.

On another note we definitely will noty be choosing DH's brother for a variety of reasons...he's not confirmed, hasnt been to church since our wedding and before that it was probably to make his first communion 25 years ago. He is not that into family and doesnt have the same values/beliefs as us. Thought it might help to see why we DIDNT choose people too