What would you think/feel?

You and your DH invite a group of friends over and one couple never gives a definitive answer, saying that they may or may not come, they're not sure and this is only after you ask them specifically again just a couple of days before the day.

How would you react and/or what would you think/feel?

Edited for details.

Message edited 1/25/2008 8:09:56 AM.

Re: What would you think/feel?

I would be annoyed. I totally understand where you are coming from.

This happens often with some my friends, and it's so frustrating. I guess there really is nothing you can do though.

Re: What would you think/feel?

We've had parties where people are in or unsure and then everyone cancels. One Halloween party was like that and I had put so much work into it. It makes me really mad and I actually haven't had a party since then because I have a feeling people will do the same thing again. I wasn't really hurt, I think they are just unreliable people. We're in a different situation because we're in a different state from our friends, and all the people we invite over are in grad school. So people tend to rather work than be social. But if it was good friends that did this, then I would be hurt. Sorry that you are going through this too!

Re: What would you think/feel?

I would be very annoyed. If you are trying to make plans with someone who as of that moment does not have any other plans....what's the problem with saying YES? This always annoyed me with my friends b/c is seems as if they are holding out for something better so they don't want to commit to anything.

Re: What would you think/feel?

I would be annoyed. Its rude not to respond either way especially when there is food involved.

Re: What would you think/feel?

I've dealt with this alot - friends are non-committal about a party, and then cancel or come at the last minute.

I've limited being the initiator and inviting people over. If we're going to get together I suggest going out somewhere, that way if some people back out I havent invested too much time/money in it.

Re: What would you think/feel?

I think what's bothering me is that they think it's ok to leave everything up in the air until that day. We have things to do and set aside this day to have them over, but they may or may not come by, they'll see??

Nothing we can do like was mentioned above.

Message edited 1/25/2008 8:08:51 AM.

Re: What would you think/feel?

I would either be annoyed or go with the flow depending on the friend & the history of flakiness.

Re: What would you think/feel?

me personally i would cancel it and let them make plans next time.

Re: What would you think/feel?

i would be upset.

Re: What would you think/feel?

Honestly- Unless they have prior plans, if they really wanted to be there, they would.

Sorry you have to deal with that.

Re: What would you think/feel?

I would think I needed new friends!

Seriously, I'd cancel the whole thing and go out to dinner with my hubby.

Re: What would you think/feel?

Totally rude. I just wouldn't invite them again.

Re: What would you think/feel?

I have accepted that many of my friends are flaky about this sort of thing. But I used to get annoyed.

Re: What would you think/feel?

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Message edited 3/3/2010 11:27:07 PM.

Re: What would you think/feel?

i would tell them, "OK, just make sure you let me know no later than (put a day before) because that's when I'm planning on food shopping. I don't want a lot of leftovers lying around..."

some people are so rude--- they seem to be the type that's afraid to commit to anything, which is terrible since they're supposed to be your friends!

Re: What would you think/feel?

It would definitely bother me. I hate when people don't respond or make you feel like they will come if nothing better comes along.

Re: What would you think/feel?

I don't mean to jump in here but I have that problem with my husbands friends. I'll invite them over and cook all this dinner and they'll show up really late or not show up at all. I've decided from now on not to plan anything and if they say they're coming over I'll order food. It's very annoying.

Re: What would you think/feel?

Thinks like this drive me nuts. I hate when people are so non-committal. It has happened several times with my friends, and I usually stop planning things for awhile after.

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This is a prime reason why we've decreased our family get togethers to a minimum. Always an excuse.

Re: What would you think/feel?

Absolutely ridiculous and rude. I'm sorry they're treating you this way, Yesenia. I'd be really pissssed myself.

Re: What would you think/feel?

DH, like me, has been annoyed by the whole non committal thing. I'm sure he's not going to be happy when I tell him tonight what happened. I guess we learned our lesson and won't be inviting anyone over that obviously doesn't want to come!

Message edited 1/25/2008 8:11:51 AM.

Re: What would you think/feel?

Sounds more like they are waiting for better plans to pop up and don't want to commit to you. Sounds familiar to me too!