When will the guilt go away ? sorry so long.

Hi Ladies, Monday was DD first day @ daycare, and she is going 3x a week until September then full time, she has been @ work with me up until this point, and it is not fair to her anymore, she wants lots of attention and she is so mobile and confined here. My question is -- I waited SO long to have a baby and now I am paying someone $1100.00 to take care of her. My heart is breaking, it hurts. She was crying at daycare and then she stopped but they said she was crying here and there, it never lasted long and when I picked her up, she looked very happy! that helped a little, but today I dropped her off and she looked a little sad, and I couldn't see if she was crying from where I was standing, but the teacher took her to hold her, so I am guessing she was crying. I can't imagine being so young and looking around for your mommy and you are surrounded by strangers, uggh , it gives me soo much anxiety.

Also, when I pick her up, I wonder if they lie, they said she loved her veggies (she doesn't eat them at home) and they said she cried a little, how do I know if that is the truth or not.? She could've cried for 4 hours and I would never know about it.

Thanks all for listening.

Re: When will the guilt go away ? sorry so long.

sorry for what you are feeling....I am sure she is in great hands and she will thrive in day care

Re: When will the guilt go away ? sorry so long.

omg---just wrote a similiar post---
i hate this feeling!! being a working mother sux!!

Re: When will the guilt go away ? sorry so long.

I know the feeling, I have a sickness that is called "Not My Child" Syndrome. At nursery he eats a lot, sleeps a lot in the day. But, what happens is when they see other kids doing something, they all do it. So they become "institutionalised" very quickly.

It will become easier, once she makes some relationships with the carers and gets used to it, she will love going! I guarantee it!

Re: When will the guilt go away ? sorry so long.

I know just how you feel. My Diana is adopted from China, I stayed home with her for 3 months then she went into day care. I felt so guilty. I was so upset. I did not want her to have any doubts that I would be back to get her. She was older, 21 months at the time. I cried so much the first couple of weeks when I had to drop her off. She cried too, but stopped soon after I left. I can tell you she absolutly loves being at school (for her it is pre-school now). She loves the teachers, the other kids, the socialization and the learning. She looks foreward to going to school.

They do things at daycare they sometimes do not do at home. I know there were things Diana ate there she would not touch at home,or played with toys at daycare, then I bought them for her and she hardly touched them at home.

It will take time, but I bet it is harder on you than on your precious angel.

Re: When will the guilt go away ? sorry so long.

Re: When will the guilt go away ? sorry so long.

Posted by 5ofClubs

Posted by JenBenMen

omg---just wrote a similiar post---
i hate this feeling!! being a working mother sux!!

13 months later and still feel the guilt

Re: When will the guilt go away ? sorry so long.

I know exactly how you feel. I had so much guilt when I put my girls in daycare. My oldest has been in there for 3 years and my youngest for over a year and putting them there has been the best thing so far we could have done for them. THEY LOVE IT. My daughter wakes up and says she wants to go to school.

Yes, I understand the guilt factor of putting them in there. However, it's not like it'a choice, it's very very difficult to live on Long Island and on one salary. You have to do what you have to and TRUST ME....they are fine and the socilization skills they are getting is wonderful! Wait until your DC comes home w/crafts and singing things you'll be amazed.

I know it's tough right now but believe me it does get easier.

Re: When will the guilt go away ? sorry so long.

I want to thank you ALL for your responses!!!


Love,
Karen