Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Im sure people will have a problem with this post.

I work with a girl that always things their DC is perfect and to be perfectly honest, its driving me insane. No matter what happens her answers are always better. Sometimes I cant seem to believe that everything she says is true.

She also compares what her ped. says differently than what mine says. Kinda like her ped. is the best and mine is crap. KWIM?? Im not jealous at all..its not that. I just cant stand it.

Does anyone have someone like this in their life? Im getting to the point that I dont even want to ask her about her DC anymore since I will know the answer.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Yes, I know someone like this but I just limit conversation with this person. Honestly, some people are just like this and you cannot change them so just keep her at a distance.

Try to ignore her.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

I don't know anyone like that directly - but man, that must be annoying!

Next time, you should make a comment like "what did your miraculous daughter do today?"

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

My Paxton is an angel I brag about how wonderful my kids are all the time, I don't think there is anything wrong with it. I do also share how rotten they can be and how they drive me crazy at times too though. I would just take what she says with a grain of salt and humor her.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Abby just cured the common cold while solving multiple quadratic equations and reciting the Greek alphabet. I'm still not impressed.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

I am one of those, I think my son is an angel, and I think I am perfectly entitled to feel that way, and to brag about it if I want to. Again, like MrsBumbleb, take it with a grain of salt, and start bragging about how wonderful your kid is!!!

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

I understand, but IMO no kid is an angel. Yes, my DD does great things, but she can also be a handful and I talk about that to. Not just all the "good" things.

What I was trying to say was that she never says "oh DD was a brat last night, or "she threw such a tantrum in the store last night that it embarrassed me to death". Thats what I am trying to get across.

Everyone loves their DC and I, of course, do, but not every day is like being in paradise.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

some people just don't feel comfortable talking about the "bad" stuff... i think it's possible that she doesn't realize what she is doing. these days i find myself bragging about DS more and more, and complaining only rarely.

that thing about the ped, comparing what they say - that would only bother me if she was trying to get you to do something different, or make you feel bad. it happens on here when certain people question what peds have told other mommies, when their own peds are saying something different. but i don't think it's done out of maliciousness.

however, if your GUT is telling you that she is saying these things to be snotty or make herself "look" better, then i would go with your gut and take a step back from her

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

I would probably find it hard to bond with someone if we could never commiserate about the normal trials of child rearing.

Maybe she is a focus on the positive type of person? In any case, I think there is a fine line between focusing on the positive and living in lala land-if she always tells her kid that they are perfect how will they ever grow? I hope it's just a front and that behind the scenes she has a better balance.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

I can relate..

I have a good friend from college...she is like this in EVERY aspect of her life lately. She used to vent, blow off steam about normal life things (her DH was in a bad mood, money issues etc..). Since having her son, its like not one thing has ever gone wrong.

Talking to her on the phone made me feel like I was a freak. I would say things about DS being cranky and she would say "oh that must stink, i wonder whats wrong with him?". Everytime you ask her how things are going and how DS is, its like angels flying out her azz. Dont' get me wrong..I don't want to hear horrible things...but its unnatural the way she speaks. He is "super and great and never cries" (even though every time we speak on the phone he's screaming?). Lol.

I just chalk it up to her not wanting anyone else to know that maybe it can be tough sometimes or maybe he's not "perfect". I just do know I get annoyed and limit my conversations...only because the venting is always one sided and I start to feel like a complainer. I'll choose to talk to my friends that can relate and all the rest of them certainly can...and I'm not just talking about here and there hard times with their children, I mean normal venting like money problems, being tired, feeling overwhelmed sometimes....this particular friend seems to lead a life where she is never tired, never overwhelmed, her DS never ever cries or wakes up during the night and her husband is 100% perfect too. That kind of perfection to me is boring

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Posted by headoverheels

some people just don't feel comfortable talking about the "bad" stuff... i think it's possible that she doesn't realize what she is doing. these days i find myself bragging about DS more and more, and complaining only rarely.

that thing about the ped, comparing what they say - that would only bother me if she was trying to get you to do something different, or make you feel bad. it happens on here when certain people question what peds have told other mommies, when their own peds are saying something different. but i don't think it's done out of maliciousness.

however, if your GUT is telling you that she is saying these things to be snotty or make herself "look" better, then i would go with your gut and take a step back from her

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

I agree completely with the OP's. talking about bad stuff is so much more difficult (emotionally and physically) than talking about good, great stuff, especially when it comes to your kids. Its such a pleasure to talk about how great my kid is, but a chore to talk about naughtyness.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

I think it depends on what kind of friend you are. My closest of friends know that Jack can be the sweetest kid - and they also know that he can be very difficult at times.

To someone who I consider an aquaintance I may just share the good parts about Jack.

Either way, there are always going to be people who think there children do no wrong....we are going to be encountering this for the next 18 years.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

i know someone who talks that way about her kids, about her life, about everything in general. i know you'd rather share the good and not the bad, but there's sharing and then there's throwing it in your face how perfect and amazing and angelical your children are and how everything/everyone else is inferior to that. THAT'S annoying.

i totally know where you're coming from. just try to limit your conversation w her cause it gets to your after a while.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Posted by MrsBumbleb

My Paxton is an angel I brag about how wonderful my kids are all the time, I don't think there is anything wrong with it. I do also share how rotten they can be and how they drive me crazy at times too though. I would just take what she says with a grain of salt and humor her.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Some people just love to project an image of their life being perfect to anyone they can. It just shows me how empty their lives really are by doing that and it gets annoying and tiring really fast

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Posted by BabyCote2006


Next time, you should make a comment like "what did your miraculous daughter do today?"

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

My answer probably wont be MOST popular...
But....
I am a HUGE advocate for my daughter. I do think she is kind, I do think she is considerate, I do think she has GREAT qualities. I dont tend to get so RILED up on the negativities. Its just not worth it to me. When shes doing something I dont like I consider her to be like "Lucille Ball"...I laugh it off...
She is crazy sometimes, looney other times but I will always praise her. No one in the world can be a bigger cheerleader then momma!
I am probably alot like the person you refer to. I am sure she has her ups and downs but I would never focus on the negativities...always positive!

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Posted by KateDevine

Posted by BabyCote2006


Next time, you should make a comment like "what did your miraculous daughter do today?"

Katie, I love ya, but really?

Honestly I would be really hurt if someone I worked with said this to me. I am always telling funny or positive stories about DS

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Message edited 3/31/2009 9:32:04 AM.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

My theory is there are some people you can be friends with and by that I mean be real and be yourself, and other's who you cannot trust as deeply. I know a few in my life who can talk up how perfect their kids are, their marriages, their homes, their cars, etc. Are they just looking at the positive - maybe? Are they obnoxious - maybe? I know my MIL was truly oblivious (and can still be) about anything negative, but it is SO totally a defense mechanism. She has a horrible marriage (if one can even call it that), but to look at her you'd think she had not marital problems. As for her kids, all 3 of her son's fell hard at some point as adults due to what my DH calls "no direction/sense of reality" - there's a lot of pain in that family but some people don't even want to deal with it. I'm not saying everyone that talks up their kids does this, but they are out there.

I have closer friends who I know I can talk to about the great things in my life and those who I know in order to get along for the amount of time we're forced to spend together that I'm better off only talking about the good stuff. Maybe when with this person talk only about things that your DC did that was good and save some of the trias and tribulations of motherhood with someone who you can be "real" with.

As for the ped thing, don't sweat that too much. All docs are so different, often in the same practice they have varying thoughts on the same things. Some are just more conservative than others and you can say just that if this person gets into a battle of wits with you.

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Re: Why do some people think that their DCs are angels.....

Message edited 3/31/2009 10:08:39 AM.