wondering

am i the only one that has come to the realization that this board stresses me out more than helping?

don't get me wrong...i LOVE the advice i get here for all of you

but i must say...

i often feel like coming to this board stresses me out more than anything

I actually have felt i needed a break from lurking and reading the threads

Re: wondering

I know what you mean. Sometimes you need to clear your head of this stuff.

Re: wondering

Certain aspects of this board stress me out. I avoid opening threads that may have that effect on me. I am genuinely happy for each BFP I see here so I open those (when I can figure them out).

I stay away from TCOYF threads and anything on charting and temping. I am not doing it so it is of no use to me to read.

I stay away from repetitive questions. I often come here to seek refuge. As much as I love talking to DH about planning a family, he is a guy and like many guys, they dont see things the way women do. Sure there are a few exceptions, but right now, my DH is playing John (not Steve, Red) Madden 05 on his PS2 whereas I would like to be picking baby names and thinking about nursery colors.

Re: wondering

You are definitely not the only one!!! I feel like this board is very counter-productive at times. I see so many of the posters so excited over every sign, only to be disappointed. I also feel like a lot of the responses to "signs" and charts are over the top - and are only setting up posters for disappointment.

IMO, this board almost adds a "competitive" element to TTC, which is the last thing everyone needs. I feel like this board stresses out people unnecessarily, and we all know that stress is not good for TTC.

Message edited 9/26/2006 6:26:44 AM.

Re: wondering

I am in the minority here. I really do not get stressed on this board actually it makes think positive about TTC.

Re: wondering

Re: wondering

I feel the same way. I didn't think that TTC took so much work until I came on here. And I think about it all the time.

Re: wondering

It stresses me out because I think that now I am overanalyzing every little slight symptom that I feel. I will read things and then realize I am feeling that a few days later so I get my hopes up.

I think that LIF in general has just made me more paranoid about getting pregnant, staying pregnant, and having a healthy baby. I never realized before how many things can go wrong before I came to LIF - and now after seeing what hard times so many of the girls have gone through - has made me somewhat of a nervous nelly.

Re: wondering

I can see how all the terms and methods can stress someone. But, I think, since I lurked for long before we started to TTC, it wasn't as overwhelming and I was familar with the lingo before I really needed to be. I really do consider this board a resource. Admittedly, I stress myself sometimes, but I can't blame this board - I'm my own worst enemy!
And, I'm glad I can sometimes offer help to another TTC'er or lurker (whether is be just a hug or actual advice).

ETS: I also think certain people benefit from lots of information, some benefit from lack of information - sometimes, ignorance is bliss!

Message edited 9/26/2006 10:16:40 AM.

Re: wondering

It can be stressful but I find this site more helpful than stressful.

The reason is stressful is my own fault....I was overanalizing everything. But thanks to this board I realized I''m not alone, there are things that are helpful that I had never heard of to TTC and the support is wonderful!

Re: wondering

Believe me...you're not the only one. I have found myself not on this board as much...and even the infertility board I'm not on as much lately...but, I do have to go and check on my girls every now and again to give them the love and support they need...

It's really hard...

Re: wondering

The only thing I find stressful about this is that since I (unfortunately) have experience with problems I feel bad if I don't respond to people's questions. By the same token I think if you want to get pregnant you should at least know that you can only get pg at certain times and know whne those times are. I see SOOO many people on here saying they don't want to chart or use OPK's because its stressful but then they are on here analyzing their pg symptoms. I think EVERYONE should know about their own bodies TTC or not.

Re: wondering

YES!!! This may sound bitchy but...

What I find MOST stressful is constantly reading the same questions over and over again when the thread with the ANSWER is like 2 threads down.

I mean, I totally understand that people have questions but it seems like some are just so....for lack of a better word...lazy. People don't want to even bother to try to do some research to answer their own questions...

But I guess that happens on every board.

Re: wondering

There were definitely times were I needed a break from the boards. TTC or IF.

It can be overwhelming. But it was always nice to know they were still there when I needed them again.

Re: wondering

YESSSSS

I think you are 100% RIGHT.

I swear Jenn, sometimes I wonder if all this anticipation and etc etc is what makes this so hard and take so long.

I mean yes I have and DH has some fertility issues, but I swear talking about TTC all the time since day one has made me much more crazy and stressed IMO then others who dont use the "boards".

I have said that for a while now.

Its a shame though, I wish I "understood" it

Re: wondering

Re: wondering

YES!!! infact my DH used to say..GET OFF THAT SITE!!!

Re: wondering

thanks everyone

it is nice to know it is not just me..

i am by no way taking anything away from it..I have been fortunate to have found wonderful girls to talk to and who have given me info and advice..

SO i am not judging this board by any means...it is a good resource


I just often feel that looking at the threads and whatnot..

well it intensifies my stress..and i often find myself saying..."YOU WILL NOT LOOK AT THAT BOARD TODAY!"ETA...and the TODAYS are turning into THIS MONTH

Message edited 9/26/2006 5:55:04 PM.

Re: wondering

I have been trying to put my response into words about this board.

I do get depressed sometimes posting here, I feel like I have been here forever in TTC "pergatory".
One month blends into the next for me-

but......................................at the same time, I am genuinely happy to hear peoples progress. The support lvel here is phenomenal if you are having an off day, week, month etc.

SOme of the questions are redundant but it is good to have a place to share how we are feeling, things we are experiencing.


ETA- sometimes DH just doesn't get it emotionally


This board is bittersweet, when I feel like I need a break from it, I can't help but come back to see what's new with the ladies.

TO answer your question, it can be depressing but sometimes encouraging. Although, that being said, I am SO READY TO GRADUATE form here




babydust:

Message edited 9/27/2006 8:41:30 AM.

Re: wondering

no, you are not alone. i get freaked out when i read the infertility boards. so many things can go wrong.

Re: wondering

Re: wondering

I also wanted to say when I started on this journey I believed I would get PG(and stay PG) right away. Unfortunately that will probably not happen for me unmedicated. I have a genetic clotting issue that can not eb controlled without blood thinners and extra folic acid and B vitamins.

I do have to say I have never been one to bury my head to a probl;em. I have learned so much on this board. There have been some very helpful ladies who have inspired me to be more pro active. To each his own I guess, but I don't just leave my desire to have children in the Dr's hands-I try to know as much as i can and I have tos ay this board helped me in the beginning.

ETA: I don't chart or temp-I know my body and I use OPK's for about 3 days a month.

Message edited 9/27/2006 2:41:02 PM.

Re: wondering

Posted by Karen

You are definitely not the only one!!! I feel like this board is very counter-productive at times. I see so many of the posters so excited over every sign, only to be disappointed. I also feel like a lot of the responses to "signs" and charts are over the top - and are only setting up posters for disappointment.

IMO, this board almost adds a "competitive" element to TTC, which is the last thing everyone needs. I feel like this board stresses out people unnecessarily, and we all know that stress is not good for TTC.

Re: wondering

YES

And this is why I mostly lurk here now...the next time I post on here for myself, I will be pg.