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twicethefun
Loving life
Member since 7/06 4088 total posts
Name:
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Your thoughts please
A boy, let's call him Joe, has a best friend who he adores and plays with everyday since they are neighbors.
When Joe and his bf are place in the same class, Joe is shocked and disturbed by what a "bad listener" his bf is in school. Joe is a very serious student and refuses to be silly like bf. Bf gets angry. Joe is sad and can't understand why his bf is such a "baby."
What would you tell the Joe to do???? Seriously, he did not play with his best friend all day because of this tension...So sad because they could not wait to be in the same class together. Will this all blow over?
Message edited 9/7/2010 10:03:28 PM.
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Posted 9/7/10 10:02 PM  |
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ny55angel
car seat tech & geek :-)
Member since 2/06 4346 total posts
Name:
P
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Re: Your thoughts please
While they couldn't wait to be in the same class together, maybe they are together too much now. Joe is now seeing a different side to his bf, and unfortunatly it's a side that he doesnt' like.
Not knowing exactly how old they are, I would say to talk to Joe, and tell him that while he thinks that his bf is being a 'baby' that all kids act silly at times. Remind Joe that you can be silly at school but not while they're supposed to be learning. "Silly time" should be saved for recess and after school.
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| Posted 9/7/10 11:15 PM |
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twicethefun
Loving life
Member since 7/06 4088 total posts
Name:
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Re: Your thoughts please
Thanks.
Posted by ny55angel
"Silly time" should be saved for recess and after school.
This is pretty much exactly what Joe told me! Obviously "Joe" is my son. While I do not want to tell him that he should get in trouble with his friend, I do not want him so upset either. The silliness is not new for this child and I know his mom and his teacher had to ride him a lot last year. BUT I never told my son. In fact it never really occurred to me that he would care.
I am very proud that he is such a serious student but I am worried that this situation put such a damper on his first day.
I told him to stay out of it and let the teacher and bf's mom deal with it. I also told him that his bf is still his bf. Is that enough? I almost felt like I needed to permit some more silliness from my son, but this could go drastically wrong, so I left it like that. WDYT?
He was just so shocked by his friend its all he talked about and he asked me not to tell. which I will not.
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| Posted 9/8/10 7:29 AM |
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ny55angel
car seat tech & geek :-)
Member since 2/06 4346 total posts
Name:
P
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Re: Your thoughts please
his bf is his bf, but unfortunatly, sometimes bf's change over the years, and personality changes and maturation have a lot to do with that.
I personally think that Joe has a good head on his shoulders if he is serious about school and he is telling you that his bf's silliness is too much.
I wouldn't "permit" more silliness, b/c I think you're right, it could turn out to be a BIG mistake. If you think that Joe knows when it's appropriate and not appropriate to be silly then I would leave it at that.
Give it a week or two and see if he tells you anything else about bf. Maybe the bf is just having a rough time adjusting to school again after being off for 2 whole months.
good luck !!
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| Posted 9/8/10 11:50 AM |
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twicethefun
Loving life
Member since 7/06 4088 total posts
Name:
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Re: Your thoughts please
Posted by ny55angel
his bf is his bf, but unfortunatly, sometimes bf's change over the years, and personality changes and maturation have a lot to do with that.
I personally think that Joe has a good head on his shoulders if he is serious about school and he is telling you that his bf's silliness is too much.
I wouldn't "permit" more silliness, b/c I think you're right, it could turn out to be a BIG mistake. If you think that Joe knows when it's appropriate and not appropriate to be silly then I would leave it at that.
Give it a week or two and see if he tells you anything else about bf. Maybe the bf is just having a rough time adjusting to school again after being off for 2 whole months.
good luck !!
I agree that tides change and they may grow apart. My son is definitely more into organized sports and activities than his bf. However they have been bfs since age 3 and they are now 6. Not only do they get along, but they are conveniently located next to each other with their own backyard path to each others homes.
The bf has always been silly in school, but my son never knew it. I think he was hurt that his best friend was not like him in terms of behavior in school. I doubt it will ruin their friendship since they are almost like family...but I do see their friendship constantly evolving. I guess I just felt bad for my son.
Thank you for both of your responses. You definitely gave me something to think about. It will all work out I am sure, one way or another.
Thanks again
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| Posted 9/8/10 12:35 PM |
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