baby showers

when I got the invitation, I thought "OK, no problem, I'll go". I haven't rsvp'd and I'm having second thoughts...its the first baby shower I've been to since this whole process started. Its also for a good friend, who I've been avoiding since she announced she was PG at a dinner party I attended and I had a meltdown

have you been avoiding them?
any survival tactics?

the girls I would travel to the shower with will leave any time I want to

Re: baby showers

Hi it's me

Self preservation, if you can't face it at the last minute then don't go! If you feel you can hack it then go with an escape route planned! Or go and leave before they start opening all the pressies with the cute baby stuff, then at least you put in an apperance!

Re: baby showers

I have been to a few baby showers and christenings in the last year of TTC and haven't had a problem with it.

But I agree with the previous poster - if you feel you're not up to it, then don't go and just go for a short while and leave. It's such an emotional process and you really do have to take care of yourself first.

Re: baby showers

for me it's a no, because I have found that dealing with the people at the shower is just as hard - the annoying old biddies that ask questions about when I'm going to have one, what are we waiting for, I'm not getting any younger, etc

Re: baby showers

Posted by CAT215

Hi it's me

Self preservation, if you can't face it at the last minute then don't go! If you feel you can hack it then go with an escape route planned! Or go and leave before they start opening all the pressies with the cute baby stuff, then at least you put in an apperance!

Re: baby showers

Baby showers were HARD for me. VEry hard. I avoided in all honesty all of them, even my Best friends. I only went to my SIL's b/c I was partially throwing it, and it had its rough moments, I just hung on till the end. Told myself to be strong.

Hang in there. It will pass quickly if you decide to go. If you dont, I wouldnt feel guilty over it. you have to protect yourself right now. Its ok, a good friend would understand!

Re: baby showers

This is my theroy!! I am a pediatric nurse!! SO I am constantly around small babies (although most are extremely sick) they spend a very long time in the hospital so I get close to the families and babies as there condition improves!! So with all this said My infertility issues and the fact that I want a child never leave my mind (plus I work with mostly women and so everyone is getting pregnant LOTS OF BABY SHOWERS)

I AM GOING TO HAVE A CHILD WHATEVER IT TAKES!!!

Going to showers and seeing what everyone is getting as gifts and all the baby talk is preparing me for when I have a child (whether it is through pregnancy or adoption) It's Still hard Of course Everyone oooing and Ahhhing over your friends belly and all the cute stuff!!!

But Then i think Of all these parents who carry their child for 9mths or less and have very sick babies!! We have to be thankful for our health despite our infertility!! It's feels bad but we are just taking the longer road towards becoming parents so everything will be just right!!

Remember GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO THOSE WHO WAIT!!!
I know this very well I thought I would never get married I was getting older and i am shy!! Well lo and behold my ex-boyfriend from 9 years ago calls me and we reunite and now I am married to him!! Keep your chin up!! It will happen!!

GO have fun!! Just think it will be your turn soon and it will!!!

Re: baby showers

You really have to do what feels right. I have gone to a few and I usually leave when it starts to gets uncomfortable for me...could be at any point...sometimes before gift opening, sometimes after. I just make sure I go before I would have any kind of meltdown, so far so good.

Re: baby showers

Coming from someone without the same issues, if my friend was having an emotional issue with my pregnancy I would want her to be honest with me. Just tell her what is going on so she knows that it is not personal.

HUGS

Re: baby showers

Red,

Not only did I go to three baby showers this year, I had to host one because it was my bff.

It's hard...no bullsh!t, but you gotta go deep within yourself. Did I cry when I got to my car? Yes, both times. Did I cry when I went to BRU to buy a gift? Yes, and once went to Target because I couldn't go into BRU without knowing a meltdown was near. But I got thru it is all I wanted to tell you.

I come on here and talk about it, it helps.

Lots of for you, 'cause I know how you feel.

...edited for spelling. It's too early on a Saturday morning for me to think.

Message edited 11/4/2006 8:00:28 AM.

Re: baby showers

Do as much as you are comfortable with and not a moment more. Use the escape route as soon as you need it.